suck it.....

[diemaetresse]

I knew that I would be screwing myself over by working part-time, but this sucks. I mean how can I even eat with what I make? I can't rely on my husband for anything and I am constantly starving at work because the nasty frozen food I get from home is not filling for the days I do work.
I am going to have to work full-time again even if that means more stress and putting my health at risk again. But I do not want to work there anymore, I feel like it has sucked the life out of me.

I mean why can't i be happy regardless, I can't stand to be away from my family when I work full-time and can't afford to work part-time with the gas prices being so high, I can't even buy that many groceries with what I made before because of bills. I can't even save money because people are constantly needing money for everything. I mean why bother, I am not going to be satisfied either way.

I get so depressed watching these travel channels of places I will never get to see because I am so broke and feel almost resigned to being miserable, because I know life is short and I want to enjoy it but i feel something holding me back from acting like a jerk to get what I want.