(no subject)
i cant stop posting because i cant stop fucking thinking so i guess ive just written three new posts in the last ten minutes. its not fair. its not fair. lifes not fair but why cant mine be. i called my mom like 40 times yesterday and she said i still had to leave at what time i did..so then i came home and they were all asleeping and i am going to be grounded today for calling her bitch like 50 times but i dont care because its not like i have anywhere to go besides the teen choir picnic that i dont want to go to anyways. i dont know what to do. who to go to. ive already tried to talk to him. i guess in my heart i know he doesnt like me anymore. i just want him to. i dont even know what i did wrong. what did i do wrong? maybe its because im a fucking psycho and i said something gay or acted really stupid somehow. i dont know. i must have really fucked up. now everytime i think about doing stupid stuff i think about trevor and mills and know i cant because of them because i need to see them. life is so confusing. why cant people just tell me things instead of letting me want to kill myself for them.