(no subject)
Programming is a very rewarding process. It's like many other things in that you are given a problem with nearly infinite solutions. Your task is to decide which solution would be best suited for your particular situation. When all is said and done, when I hit the debug button (a preview/play button if you will) and everything runs flawlessly, a certain sense of accomplishment floods my veins.
I think after all, I may find some joy working with computers. I have, for the longest time, regretted my decision to switch majors from Journalism to CIS but now I think I have grown to relish in it. As a matter of fact, I find it surprisingly comparable to writing. There were a dozen other ways which I could have written and organized this entry but I chose this one. I got my point across in a way which I find efficient and effective.
My aunt even offered me a considerable sum of money if I were to develop software for my job. She also offered to allow me to work on it while on the clock. Furthermore, I'll be getting experience on the field doing service plumbing. I'm very excited for this summer.
Remember that epiphany?
Be warned: This shit is deep. :]
It is truly humbling to me how strongly something as insignificant and obscure as a longer shadow can affect my congeniality. I have learned that dusk is by far my favorite time of day. It is an incredibly, to borrow Olivia's perfectly precise adjective, introspective period between two otherwise diligent yet meticulous times of day.
The short bit of time when the Sun peers out from behind scarlet and orange is when all other things seem distant and inconsequential. I can escape for that short while to a place with no real intentions. It is a purgatory of sorts where expiation is not required or encouraged but for some reason, remains intensified and omnipresent. There is not a better time to examine one's life and be thankful. It seems that at that frozen moment in time, there is only possession and not forfeit. Nothing is missing, things only exist.
I said many weeks ago that there is no time when I feel a true sensation of relaxation or a sense of being 'free'. I was mistaken. I think that dusk is just such a time.
From this, I derive that there are two states of mind among many others which patronize people more than usual. There's the 'daytime' get up, get out, and get it done (TM - lol) mentality and the 'nighttime' wind down and prepare for the subsequent 'daytime' period. Sundown is an awkward phase though, a period between the two. The human psyche at sundown is caught between two distinct phases with no real idea of how to complete the transition. Only when focus is lost on the moment can the transition fully be complete.
One thing I have noticed is how my bouts of insomnia seem strangely correlated with missing the sunset. I liken it to that eerie feeling after leaving a movie theater at night when at the point of entry, it was day. I think that feeling can be explained by your body attempting to adjust and immediately transition from the 'daytime' phase to the 'nighttime' phase as mentioned earlier. Yet, for some reason, you never quite make it. You knew when leaving the theater, as a rational human being, that it couldn't possibly still be daytime and somehow are still taken by surprise that it's the moon's longing gaze and not the sun's bright, cheery stare upon you.
Anyway, I because of the self-reflection inspired period of dusk, I have decided that my life, from this point forward, will be lived for the moment as opposed to living for the future, the past or any other reason. I have decided that my money is not 'wasted' on CD's and fast food but rather well spent. I was satisfied by the consumption and therefore it was by no means a negative action. I have decided to go out, even after an exhausting day at work or school and spend time with those whom I love. I, from now on, will do what makes me happy without thought of consequence, incidence, or most importantly regret. I have, in effect, decided to live life like it is my last day on Earth. If any cliche was better suited for anyone else on earth, I would be extremely surprised.
I think after all, I may find some joy working with computers. I have, for the longest time, regretted my decision to switch majors from Journalism to CIS but now I think I have grown to relish in it. As a matter of fact, I find it surprisingly comparable to writing. There were a dozen other ways which I could have written and organized this entry but I chose this one. I got my point across in a way which I find efficient and effective.
My aunt even offered me a considerable sum of money if I were to develop software for my job. She also offered to allow me to work on it while on the clock. Furthermore, I'll be getting experience on the field doing service plumbing. I'm very excited for this summer.
Remember that epiphany?
Be warned: This shit is deep. :]
It is truly humbling to me how strongly something as insignificant and obscure as a longer shadow can affect my congeniality. I have learned that dusk is by far my favorite time of day. It is an incredibly, to borrow Olivia's perfectly precise adjective, introspective period between two otherwise diligent yet meticulous times of day.
The short bit of time when the Sun peers out from behind scarlet and orange is when all other things seem distant and inconsequential. I can escape for that short while to a place with no real intentions. It is a purgatory of sorts where expiation is not required or encouraged but for some reason, remains intensified and omnipresent. There is not a better time to examine one's life and be thankful. It seems that at that frozen moment in time, there is only possession and not forfeit. Nothing is missing, things only exist.
I said many weeks ago that there is no time when I feel a true sensation of relaxation or a sense of being 'free'. I was mistaken. I think that dusk is just such a time.
From this, I derive that there are two states of mind among many others which patronize people more than usual. There's the 'daytime' get up, get out, and get it done (TM - lol) mentality and the 'nighttime' wind down and prepare for the subsequent 'daytime' period. Sundown is an awkward phase though, a period between the two. The human psyche at sundown is caught between two distinct phases with no real idea of how to complete the transition. Only when focus is lost on the moment can the transition fully be complete.
One thing I have noticed is how my bouts of insomnia seem strangely correlated with missing the sunset. I liken it to that eerie feeling after leaving a movie theater at night when at the point of entry, it was day. I think that feeling can be explained by your body attempting to adjust and immediately transition from the 'daytime' phase to the 'nighttime' phase as mentioned earlier. Yet, for some reason, you never quite make it. You knew when leaving the theater, as a rational human being, that it couldn't possibly still be daytime and somehow are still taken by surprise that it's the moon's longing gaze and not the sun's bright, cheery stare upon you.
Anyway, I because of the self-reflection inspired period of dusk, I have decided that my life, from this point forward, will be lived for the moment as opposed to living for the future, the past or any other reason. I have decided that my money is not 'wasted' on CD's and fast food but rather well spent. I was satisfied by the consumption and therefore it was by no means a negative action. I have decided to go out, even after an exhausting day at work or school and spend time with those whom I love. I, from now on, will do what makes me happy without thought of consequence, incidence, or most importantly regret. I have, in effect, decided to live life like it is my last day on Earth. If any cliche was better suited for anyone else on earth, I would be extremely surprised.