she said space is not just a place for stars.
i'm in a light filled internet cafe above swanston street and the guy sitting behing me is wearing checkered underpants and crusing myspace. not that i am doing much better.
the last month has seemed like one long holiday at home. the constant stream of people in and out of melbourne has left me exhausted and, as much as i love it, spending a few quite nights at home was, for once, fairly satisyfing. nothing like washing your underwear when you've run out of clear pairs.
underwear appears to be a running theme for this entry.
at the risk of having a rant, i would like to address the concept of betrayal. now, in this day and age some would argue that the idea of loyalty is outdated and that we live in an essentially existential society where the ultimate goal is our own hapiness. whether this be at the expense of other peoples comfort or happiness or not. and generally i would agree wholeheartedly with them.
now, I am essentially a self oriented person, who only at times has a streak of consideration for the rest of the human race. however, the last seven months and the knowledge that it is possible to be alone in a room filled with people has left me with some kind of regard for the delicacy of human relationships. the realisation that sometimes you need to lean on the people in your life, whereas sometimes its better to just be a lone wolf and walk your own path. tough realisations, i know, but lets face it, i'm not exactly known for making the best decisions.
anyway, the people i choose to keep close to my heart are lucky indeed, because despite the lively and often chaotic persona i exhibit, there is a lot more going on beneath the surface. few people are exposed to this. essentially i would do anything for them, in exchange all i expect is their unfaltering loyalty and understanding.
any deviation from said expectations of loyalty is shattering to the point of soul destruction.
i honestly think i might be harbouring some serious trust issues from now onwards.
but perhaps this is life.
and, you know. this whole moving away from home thing was all about life experience. life lessons.
perhaps it was time for a particularly devastating piece of disillusionment.
but when the amazing turns on you, it tends to be disheartening.
Anastasia
the last month has seemed like one long holiday at home. the constant stream of people in and out of melbourne has left me exhausted and, as much as i love it, spending a few quite nights at home was, for once, fairly satisyfing. nothing like washing your underwear when you've run out of clear pairs.
underwear appears to be a running theme for this entry.
at the risk of having a rant, i would like to address the concept of betrayal. now, in this day and age some would argue that the idea of loyalty is outdated and that we live in an essentially existential society where the ultimate goal is our own hapiness. whether this be at the expense of other peoples comfort or happiness or not. and generally i would agree wholeheartedly with them.
now, I am essentially a self oriented person, who only at times has a streak of consideration for the rest of the human race. however, the last seven months and the knowledge that it is possible to be alone in a room filled with people has left me with some kind of regard for the delicacy of human relationships. the realisation that sometimes you need to lean on the people in your life, whereas sometimes its better to just be a lone wolf and walk your own path. tough realisations, i know, but lets face it, i'm not exactly known for making the best decisions.
anyway, the people i choose to keep close to my heart are lucky indeed, because despite the lively and often chaotic persona i exhibit, there is a lot more going on beneath the surface. few people are exposed to this. essentially i would do anything for them, in exchange all i expect is their unfaltering loyalty and understanding.
any deviation from said expectations of loyalty is shattering to the point of soul destruction.
i honestly think i might be harbouring some serious trust issues from now onwards.
but perhaps this is life.
and, you know. this whole moving away from home thing was all about life experience. life lessons.
perhaps it was time for a particularly devastating piece of disillusionment.
but when the amazing turns on you, it tends to be disheartening.
Anastasia