The Punishment of Joe Grundstrom - Part 1
In a nearly empty neighbourhood there was a bungalow. It was a nice bungalow, a good size and quite nicely decorated. There were thousands like it in the multiverse, having been made by Maxis, but in this miniverse it belonged to me. I had only just moved in, but having gotten myself settled, I had invited some friends over.
"Hi Everyone, I think we all know why we are here." I said smiling at my guests.
Cait smiled. "Does it have anything to do with a certain bastard who treated the lovely Alexandra in an appalling manner?"
"Absolutely." I replied.
"Excellent." Said Doc rubbing her hands with glee. "I hope we are going to see him suffer lots and lots of pain and humiliation."
"Well...maybe." I replied, a wicked gleam in my eye.
"Ooo, ooo, ooo." Gin was practically bouncing up and down where she stood. "Is this why you asked the question over at Boolprop?"
"Yup."
"So we are going to see..." She trailed off. "You know what, I can't wait."
"Neither can I." Said Sarah. "In fact do we have to?"
I looked at them all. "Oh you mean you don’t want me to continue to do my cruel, 'I'm going to make you all wait to see what I have in store for Joe ' act?"
They all looked at me as if I was mad.
"NO!"
"We want to see Joe suffer." Supplied Katy.
"Yeah, and we're not at all blood thirsty or cruel." Said Lea. "Honest."
Silence filled the room.
"Well maybe a little." Said Orikes with a small smile.
"Fine let's get on with it then." I said.
There was a flash and Joe suddenly appeared in the centre of the room.
"What?" He looked around astonished. "Where am I?" He caught sight of me.
"Miss Di? But you look so different." He continued to scan the faces of the assembled simselves. "Doc? Mrs Legacy? Why are you here? Why am I here?"
"You are here Joe to get your just desserts for how you treated Alexandra." Replied Cait.
"What? But...?"
"You're a dog Joe." Said Circe. "You used Alexandra and then when you were done, you abandoned her."
"Now hold on, I think you are being too harsh. Yes I should have finished it sooner, but I did stop it before we were wed."
"But not soon enough." Said Marina. "Thankfully a very awesome man was in love with her and they are now married."
Joe thought for a while. "Anthony."
"Anthony." I agreed.
"So that is why he wanted me to finish it..." He started to get angry.
"No you dingbat! All he wanted was for her to be happy, and knew that being with you would have made her miserable." I was getting exasperated.
"Enough chat. Bored now." Said Doc.
"I agree, shall we begin?"
The reaction was unanimous.
"Ok then. Guys you can watch on the big screen in the other room."
Then with a flash of light three of us disappeared.
Two of us re-appeared by the side of a dilapidated, graffiti covered building.
"Well this is different." Said Doc looking around.
"Not the type of place we normally go to." I agreed. "I just hope that there are no unsavoury characters about."
"You mean like us." Said a familiar voice.
We turned round to see Larch, Indy and Archie Vetinari standing there.
"Larch! So good to see you." Said Doc giving him a hug. "I miss not having you around."
"Of course you do." Replied Larch. "No one else like me."
"True."
I meanwhile was greeting Indy.
"Hi honey." I kissed him softly.
"Hi yourself."
"Where's mine?" Growled Archie.
"Sorry?"
"My simself, where is she? Larch gets to hug Doc, Indy has his Di. Where's mine?"
"Oh poor Archie." Said Doc. "Only a few simselves have ever been off limits to you, and here you are stuck with two of the."
"Hmm, yeah, funny." He snarled. "Where is she?"
"Sorry Archie," I said, "but that's not why you are here."
"Then why?"
Doc had been having a look around, and had spotted where Joe had appeared.
"I think I know." She said with a grin.
"Then explain." Archie's notoriously short temper was getting shorter and shorter.
Doc walked back to him. "Apart from woohooing simselves, what do you enjoy more than anything?"
"An argument and a good fight." Comprehension dawned and his features relaxed into what for him passed as a smile. "Sweet."
"All of you are here to teach someone a very good lesson."
"Who?" Asked Larch with a grim smile.
Doc motioned to the mouth of the alley.
Larch peered round the wall to see Joe standing at the far end fretting.
'Oh this does not look like a nice place. That twisted cow, what sort of a clicky person is she to bring me here?'
Larch turned back to Doc. "Why?"
"There needs to be a reason?" Growled Archie.
Larch looked steadily at his great, great grandson.
"No, but I'm curious."
Doc looked over at me. "Di, you want to put Indy down for a minute and explain?"
Reluctantly I pulled out of Indy's embrace. I turned and walked back towards Larch, Archie and Doc, with Indy following me.
"I know this." Said Indy. "It's good."
"That bastard," I motioned towards the alley, "took advantage of someone very dear to me, Alexandra. She thought she loved him and that he loved her, but he didn't. Thing is he was too cowardly to tell her he didn't want to see her again. Then he changed his mind, decided she would make a convenient wife, and proposed to her."
"Feel like getting to the point?" Snarled Archie.
"I'm getting there Archie."
"Only this talking is cutting into my fighting time."
"There's plenty of fighting time, don't worry. Anyway, he eventually left her at the altar, but not before she was pregnant with his children."
"The dude never heard of condoms?" Asked Archie.
"Regalton only exists in the nineteenth century Archie." Supplied Indy. "Unless you are 'hooing a simself or your name is Stanley, there's no contraception."
Archie's face fell for a moment, before he remembered something. "I like simselves."
"Anyway," I continued before Archie started to ask how he could get to Regalton, "that utter, utter bastard left Alexandra broken hearted, and in a shameful situation. She would have been seen as morally bankrupt and a common whore. She would have been lucky if she had escaped being put in an asylum."
"He deserves a good kicking for treating her like that, and abandoning his childrinions." Snarled Larch, cracking his knuckles.
"To be fair, he doesn’t know about his kids." I pointed out.
"Doesn't matter."
"Meh, he deserved a kicking before I heard that." Said Archie. "Just because everyone does at some point."
By this time Joe had gotten very anxious standing stranded in the alley.
"YOU CRAZY BITCH!" He started to yell. "YOU CANNOT JUST LEAVE ME HERE YOU KNOW!"
"I think that's our cue." Said Indy
"I agree."
"Yup enough talk, time to fight." Snarled Archie.
"That's my boys." Said Doc as they moved into the dark alley.
Joe was very panicked by now but as soon as he saw Indy, Archie and Larch approach him he started to relax.
"Oh thank goodness. That crazy bitch of a clicky person has abandoned me here. Can you point the way back to Simmingtonbury?"
Indy glared at him. "If I were you, I would refrain from calling Di names."
Archie snarled at Joe and Larch cracked his knuckles. Suddenly Joe had the feeling that maybe these three men wouldn't be so helpful after all.
"Continue, and I will hurt you more." Finished Indy.
Fear made Joe bold and stupid.
"Really? And what is it to you what I call the bitch?"
He didn't see the blow coming.
"That 'bitch' as you call her is the woman I love."
"Isn't he wonderful when he is defending my name?" I asked smiling at Doc.
"Yeah," she thought about how Theo had once defended her honour when for some reason Mortimer Goth had attacked her. "It's nice when they do that. Unnecessary, but nice."
"Yeah."
"Seeing you and Indy makes me miss Theo." Doc said wistfully.
"Theo's here in the neighbourhood, did I not tell you?"
"Obviously not."
I grimaced. "Sorry I did mean to."
We looked down the alley again, where Joe was pulling himself upright, whilst Indy was gesturing at him impatiently.
"Shall we go watch?" I asked.
"Hell yeah!" Came the answer.
As we started down the alley Indy, having gotten fed up with waiting for Joe to get up, let rip with another punch.
By the time we got to the end, a full blown fight was going on.
"Woo go Indy!" Shouted Doc.
Whilst I cowered.
"Oo my poor Indy, what if he gets hurt?"
"You changed your personality just enough so that you won't run away, but not enough so you cheer didn't you?" Asked Doc as Joe made an attempt to hit Indy.
"Yeah."
"HAH!" Said Indy dusting off his hands. "That'll teach you to call Di names, and take advantage of Alexandra."
Indy walked over to me, leaving Joe to try to pick himself up from the floor.
"Best thing I've seen today." I said running my finger along his jaw.
"Ow." He flinched slightly.
"You alright?" I asked,
"Yeah, bastard got in a lucky blow."
"Oh my poor baby." I kissed the spot gently.
"He also caught me here." He pointed to his chin, which I dutifully kissed.
A wicked gleam appeared in his eye and he opened his mouth to speak, but I pre-empted him.
"Don't push your luck mister," I said with a wry smile, "I have things to be getting on with."
"Spoilsport."
"I know. Once we've finished with this, you can have me all to yourself."
"I'm gonna hold you to that promise."
Whilst we had been speaking Larch had walked up to Joe as he finally got to his feet.
"You're a scumbag for taking advantage of that poor girl and abandoning her as you did. You have brought this all on yourself, remember that."
He then lunged at Joe.
"Go Larch!" Cheered Doc.
"Come on old man, I want my turn!" Shouted Archie.
"That's it, hit him! HIT HIM!" Encouraged Indy.
And I cowered again.
"And that is why you should have made sure that a one nice point, Eeevil, protective family sim never found out about how you treated Alexandra."
"Larch, that was great." Said Doc. "Have I told you how much I miss having you around?"
"Of course it was great, and of course you miss me. Who wouldn’t miss me?"
By now it was finally Archie's turn to beat up Joe.
"Are you going to censure me too?" Asked Joe.
"Me? No. I don’t give a shit what you have or haven't done. All I know is I want to punch you."
So he did.
"Di are you hiding behind me?" Asked Doc as she watched Archie land one on Joe's jaw.
"...Yes." I replied.
"'Kay then. As long as I know."
"And since there are no available simselves about, that is the most fun I've had all night." Said Archie as he looked at Joe, huddled on the floor.
"That was great fun, but we're going to have to go now aren't we?" Said Doc.
"I'm afraid so, I have more planned." I replied.
"I'll just go say bye to the boys then."
Doc stepped over Joe's prone body and went up to Archie. "That was great my Little Bastard."
"Does this mean I can have a hug?"
"Oh alright then, but you had better not roll any wants because of this."
*snerk* "Oh I would never do that Doc."
"Hmph."
She turned and headed to Larch. "Now you I know I can hug without you rolling any wants I don't want to know about."
"You know it Doc."
"You'll be at the finale?" I asked Indy as we finished saying goodbye.
"Course." He said running his fingers through my hair. "I'll even bring these two with me."
"You do that. I think they'll enjoy it."
"Finale?" Asked Doc.
"Yup I've planned a huge whacking great finale for this thing."
"Sweet."
"But for now we had better be going." I said stepping back from Indy.
With a flash, and a fingergun from Larch, we were gone.
Part two.