the top of the world fall on you
Finally, the first REAL entry of the year. Yes.
Well, if I may say so myself, this has been by far the most interesting break I've had back home in... well, ever. Perhaps I will share the highlights so I don't end up making this into a three part novel tonight.
From the beginning:
*Slept with Justin, Steph's roommate.
*HUGE fight with Steph (that began ever BEFORE I slept with her roommate, yikes) that ended up probably being the worst, but best fight we've had yet. We got a hell of a lot cleared out of the way and off our chests.
*PS - this was probably only because we spent the first 4 hours of our 14 hour drive together in silence, and our stubborn asses finally caved. lol.
*Drove through a toll-booth the next morning, straight through one of those lever-bar thing-ma-bobs. And yes, I saw my life flash before my eyes at 65 MPH.
*Used a TOTALLY bogus 33 year old's fake ID to go bar-hopping with Chris in Chicago. Realized that even if he is one of my best friends from high school, he's STILL the asshole that won't give up on trying to get in my pants.
*Mom found out that I smoke. Told me it was one of the stupidest things I've done yet.
*Called me "too fat to ever be anorexic again" and "whore" the following day during a seperate argument.
*Convicted several times that Dan has been cheating on his girlfriend with me the entire time I've been home. WELL honey - I'm sorry that I'm gorgeous and you're so fucking insecure in your relationship.
*Spent the first 2 weeks that I was here (with the except of one 48 hour span) being drunk, in which I realized that I could NEVER live here again. Reason being - my posse of guys are all in love with me and are all over me everytime I'm within 100 feet of them. And they all kiss me. And try to get in my pants.
*HOWEVER, I have also learned this break that I absolutely love being loved by so many wonderful people. :)
*Christmas Eve watched my sister key the fuck outta my uncle's Lexus. Funniest thing I've seen. Ever.
*Lectured by my Grandma on smoking while we lit up together...
*Made a huge dent in the side of my head from banging the shit out of it trying to figure out why the hell my dad things that I'm probably doing drugs, selling drugs, oh - and that all of my friends also do drugs.
*Held back tears of laughter when Karen & I went to the mall and returned to her car freaking out because we couldn't find the keys. Only to find out - my door was unlocked and her car had been running the ENTIRE time.
*Spent several hours convincing my parents to let me go back to school this semester.
*Interrogated and locked in my old boss's office while she made me tell her everything I've been doing at school and what kind of drugs i'm on because she wants them. (she's 45 by the way)
*Secretly smiled while on 4 different occassions our waitress refered to Dave as my "boyfriend"
*Threw up on my way home from Dave's one night in a whirlwind of happiness, hope, and fear after he had brought up marriage on 7 occassions that night (and in one of those told me, "Jash, you're practically my wife). And then kissed my forehead goodnight.
*Successfully avoided the horny tennis coach
*Had the best 4 days in Maryland with Steph, ever.
*Whackiest New Year's yet. Not sure whether Angelica's mom making out with Wyntir's boyfriend last year can top the 5 year old sister playing drinking games (with kool aid of course), boys taking body shots off the step-mom, and the dad beating everyone's asses at beer pong...
*Laughed when Steph was trying to cheer me up about my 5 hour delay at BWI by telling me to make out with a cute boy.... which then later led to some mile-high foreplay with the handsome anonymous almost-thirty year old in the bathroom.... tsk tsk tsk. ;) (We talked for a really long time, too, and I still never caught his name)
*Bit my lip (and was damn proud of myself) when Dave asked if he was taking me home after the airport or if I was staying at his apartment.
... I went home.
*Spent an amazing 48 hours with Dave after that, feeding each other lobster, crab, shrimp & strawberries, watching romantic comedies, visiting old friends and relatives, and snuggling on the couch while fighting off the urge to jump his bones while he continuously made sexual innuendos.
*Definitely wanted to shoot myself after that.
*Spent 2 days laying in bed sick as a dog, being angry that I spent 4 days with sick Steph but never felt sick once until the second I got back to my house.
*Resisted the urge to go up to Milwaukee to see CJ and go to the Marquette game. Because I know why he invited me, and I know it would be a dumb idea. (SEE I'm smart, on occassion :) )
*Got my cartilidge pierced with my 2 aunts, and surprisingly enough - this was NOT my idea, AND i didn't have to pay for it. :)
*Relieved to find out from my aunt that my dad doesn't care that I smoke. Also relieved to know that my aunt already knew, so I could spent my day with her chain smoking. :)
*Favorite comment: (while I'm digging ferociously through my purse) "Having a nicotine fit, eh? See, NOW do you see why I've never been able to stop!! If you've got 'em - Smoke 'em!!!" Love my Aunt Ginger. Love her.
That's all for now, however, as my life really turns out to be a soap opera 90% of the time and I'm still in Chicago for one more week, I'm SURE I will be adding to this list before I hit Colorado again. :)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now for some randomness.
I love that my cousin asks our Aunt to send his porn while he's in Iraq. And I love it even more that she does this for him.
This Dave mess has left me crying for help, an answer, guidence, anything. I wanted to bite my lip so badly and tell him, listen, I thought we could just be friends but I CAN'T just be friends with you, so in order for me to continue to function normally without you, we need to stop talking, period. BUTTTT of COURSE I can not do this because I'm in love with the man. The stiuation starts to get sticky when I have all this time NOW to spend with him, but in a week, I won't be seeing him for at least another 6 months. So then I'll be miserable back at school. And we still won't be together, because the whole reason why we broke up in the first place was because he decided he couldn't handle the distance.
He wants to be with me, I know he does, he's told me a million times. And I want to be with him. And I've already let him go once, and he's come back, and I know he'll be there again if I let him go once more, but the thing is, I don't want to. I can't. I mentally can't. I need him. I want to hug him so tight and kiss him everywhere and have the wildest makeup sex that Jenn can hear us all the way in Canada, and maybe even Saz in Aussie if I'm feeling really down and dirrrrty. ;)
Anyways, the point is, what do I do with this boy over the next week that I still get to see him? I need help, fast. Lots of it.
And unfortunately, talking about Dave exhausts me like no other. Leave lots of notes pretty please, thank you loves and goodnight!!! xoxoxo
Well, if I may say so myself, this has been by far the most interesting break I've had back home in... well, ever. Perhaps I will share the highlights so I don't end up making this into a three part novel tonight.
From the beginning:
*Slept with Justin, Steph's roommate.
*HUGE fight with Steph (that began ever BEFORE I slept with her roommate, yikes) that ended up probably being the worst, but best fight we've had yet. We got a hell of a lot cleared out of the way and off our chests.
*PS - this was probably only because we spent the first 4 hours of our 14 hour drive together in silence, and our stubborn asses finally caved. lol.
*Drove through a toll-booth the next morning, straight through one of those lever-bar thing-ma-bobs. And yes, I saw my life flash before my eyes at 65 MPH.
*Used a TOTALLY bogus 33 year old's fake ID to go bar-hopping with Chris in Chicago. Realized that even if he is one of my best friends from high school, he's STILL the asshole that won't give up on trying to get in my pants.
*Mom found out that I smoke. Told me it was one of the stupidest things I've done yet.
*Called me "too fat to ever be anorexic again" and "whore" the following day during a seperate argument.
*Convicted several times that Dan has been cheating on his girlfriend with me the entire time I've been home. WELL honey - I'm sorry that I'm gorgeous and you're so fucking insecure in your relationship.
*Spent the first 2 weeks that I was here (with the except of one 48 hour span) being drunk, in which I realized that I could NEVER live here again. Reason being - my posse of guys are all in love with me and are all over me everytime I'm within 100 feet of them. And they all kiss me. And try to get in my pants.
*HOWEVER, I have also learned this break that I absolutely love being loved by so many wonderful people. :)
*Christmas Eve watched my sister key the fuck outta my uncle's Lexus. Funniest thing I've seen. Ever.
*Lectured by my Grandma on smoking while we lit up together...
*Made a huge dent in the side of my head from banging the shit out of it trying to figure out why the hell my dad things that I'm probably doing drugs, selling drugs, oh - and that all of my friends also do drugs.
*Held back tears of laughter when Karen & I went to the mall and returned to her car freaking out because we couldn't find the keys. Only to find out - my door was unlocked and her car had been running the ENTIRE time.
*Spent several hours convincing my parents to let me go back to school this semester.
*Interrogated and locked in my old boss's office while she made me tell her everything I've been doing at school and what kind of drugs i'm on because she wants them. (she's 45 by the way)
*Secretly smiled while on 4 different occassions our waitress refered to Dave as my "boyfriend"
*Threw up on my way home from Dave's one night in a whirlwind of happiness, hope, and fear after he had brought up marriage on 7 occassions that night (and in one of those told me, "Jash, you're practically my wife). And then kissed my forehead goodnight.
*Successfully avoided the horny tennis coach
*Had the best 4 days in Maryland with Steph, ever.
*Whackiest New Year's yet. Not sure whether Angelica's mom making out with Wyntir's boyfriend last year can top the 5 year old sister playing drinking games (with kool aid of course), boys taking body shots off the step-mom, and the dad beating everyone's asses at beer pong...
*Laughed when Steph was trying to cheer me up about my 5 hour delay at BWI by telling me to make out with a cute boy.... which then later led to some mile-high foreplay with the handsome anonymous almost-thirty year old in the bathroom.... tsk tsk tsk. ;) (We talked for a really long time, too, and I still never caught his name)
*Bit my lip (and was damn proud of myself) when Dave asked if he was taking me home after the airport or if I was staying at his apartment.
... I went home.
*Spent an amazing 48 hours with Dave after that, feeding each other lobster, crab, shrimp & strawberries, watching romantic comedies, visiting old friends and relatives, and snuggling on the couch while fighting off the urge to jump his bones while he continuously made sexual innuendos.
*Definitely wanted to shoot myself after that.
*Spent 2 days laying in bed sick as a dog, being angry that I spent 4 days with sick Steph but never felt sick once until the second I got back to my house.
*Resisted the urge to go up to Milwaukee to see CJ and go to the Marquette game. Because I know why he invited me, and I know it would be a dumb idea. (SEE I'm smart, on occassion :) )
*Got my cartilidge pierced with my 2 aunts, and surprisingly enough - this was NOT my idea, AND i didn't have to pay for it. :)
*Relieved to find out from my aunt that my dad doesn't care that I smoke. Also relieved to know that my aunt already knew, so I could spent my day with her chain smoking. :)
*Favorite comment: (while I'm digging ferociously through my purse) "Having a nicotine fit, eh? See, NOW do you see why I've never been able to stop!! If you've got 'em - Smoke 'em!!!" Love my Aunt Ginger. Love her.
That's all for now, however, as my life really turns out to be a soap opera 90% of the time and I'm still in Chicago for one more week, I'm SURE I will be adding to this list before I hit Colorado again. :)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now for some randomness.
I love that my cousin asks our Aunt to send his porn while he's in Iraq. And I love it even more that she does this for him.
This Dave mess has left me crying for help, an answer, guidence, anything. I wanted to bite my lip so badly and tell him, listen, I thought we could just be friends but I CAN'T just be friends with you, so in order for me to continue to function normally without you, we need to stop talking, period. BUTTTT of COURSE I can not do this because I'm in love with the man. The stiuation starts to get sticky when I have all this time NOW to spend with him, but in a week, I won't be seeing him for at least another 6 months. So then I'll be miserable back at school. And we still won't be together, because the whole reason why we broke up in the first place was because he decided he couldn't handle the distance.
He wants to be with me, I know he does, he's told me a million times. And I want to be with him. And I've already let him go once, and he's come back, and I know he'll be there again if I let him go once more, but the thing is, I don't want to. I can't. I mentally can't. I need him. I want to hug him so tight and kiss him everywhere and have the wildest makeup sex that Jenn can hear us all the way in Canada, and maybe even Saz in Aussie if I'm feeling really down and dirrrrty. ;)
Anyways, the point is, what do I do with this boy over the next week that I still get to see him? I need help, fast. Lots of it.
And unfortunately, talking about Dave exhausts me like no other. Leave lots of notes pretty please, thank you loves and goodnight!!! xoxoxo