a way to not yet be wanted, a way to not yet be wanted
I have somehow managed to alienate myself from everyone I used to love, and it is a halting kind of loneliness; my heart is a ghost haunting my body. Do you know what it's like, to have your body betray you?
I swim by myself, float on my back and watch the cars drive past the spillway. I eat ice cream by myself, walk around the deserted shopping complexes of run-down Tuscaloosa. Most days, I stay in bed for 18 hours, reading and sleeping.
Jorie Graham writes, "there is a way to not yet be wanted," and I'm hanging onto it by a thread. There is a way to not yet be wanted.
Songs I have been listening to lately:
♥ When I was a Young Girl, Barbara Dane
♥ You Don't Know How it Feels, Tom Petty
♥ Hospital Bed, Seabear