if you thought Saetan SaDiablo was bad...
... check out this shit :D
Dark Lover
(Black Dagger Brotherhood #1)
by J.R. Ward
Moar paranormal romance trash! Some of you have seen me on Twitter raging about recent junk I've read, Daughter of the Blood (Black Jewels #1) by Anne Bishop, where main characters were called Daemon "The Sadist" Sadi, Saetan SaDiablo, Hekatah, Lucivar, Hepsabah and Jaenelle Angelline. Takes me back to the very first paranormal crap I've experienced, more than 10 years ago, where main bitch was called Jeshikah, main dude was Jaguar, and the protagonist was called Turquoise Draka. Oh, and there was a chick named Raven. Actually, these sound pretty original now, compared to the new levels of fail everywhere. Kinda like you call a character Claude Faustus and some people still don't get why others facepalm. Kuroshitsuji needs to name their new demon Mephistopheles Satan 666th, for all fantards to understand.
Dark Lover is about a speshul girl falling in love with vampire guy, Wrath, the leader of the badass vampire organization Black Dagger Brotherhood. Kinda reminds me of pure blood brotherhood from Sword of Truth, you know, the ones who were stealing nipples? Just as absurd. Anyway, Dark Lover's names look like taken from craptastic preteen fanfiction written by a mentally retarded goth wannabe. Here are the Goodreads and Amazon reviews:
"If you want a story that is 101 different ways to describe sex (with such awesome phrases as 'drilling her'), this is the book for you."
"His homeys consist of Tohrment, Rhage, Zsadist and Phury."
"'His abs looked like he was trying to smuggle paint rollers under his skin,' what?"
Wikipedia says there are also: Butch / Dhestroyer, Vishous, Rehvenge, Tohrment, Tehrror, Qhuinn.
(Okay, so we get it, all the guys are oh so sexy macho alpha males. Females are called Elizabeth, Bella, Mary Madonna Luce, Marissa, Cormia, Ehlena, etc. Just as appropriate.)
The main antagonist is called Mr X.
And now Polish version:
"Same imiona bohaterów mogą przyprawić o gęsią skórkę. Brzmią groźnie i dziko. Ale może konkrety: Ghrom, Vhredny, Furiath, Tohrtur, Hardhy, Zbihr, Mrokh, Hardkohr..."
The fact that this book has 4.26/5 average rating on GoodReads and 4.5/5 stars on Amazon is the undeniable proof of the horrific downfall of humanity and total brain deterioration. I understand that people may enjoy poorly written porn fanfiction, but to publish these childish wet fantasies? Puh-lease.
Dark Lover
(Black Dagger Brotherhood #1)
by J.R. Ward
Moar paranormal romance trash! Some of you have seen me on Twitter raging about recent junk I've read, Daughter of the Blood (Black Jewels #1) by Anne Bishop, where main characters were called Daemon "The Sadist" Sadi, Saetan SaDiablo, Hekatah, Lucivar, Hepsabah and Jaenelle Angelline. Takes me back to the very first paranormal crap I've experienced, more than 10 years ago, where main bitch was called Jeshikah, main dude was Jaguar, and the protagonist was called Turquoise Draka. Oh, and there was a chick named Raven. Actually, these sound pretty original now, compared to the new levels of fail everywhere. Kinda like you call a character Claude Faustus and some people still don't get why others facepalm. Kuroshitsuji needs to name their new demon Mephistopheles Satan 666th, for all fantards to understand.
Dark Lover is about a speshul girl falling in love with vampire guy, Wrath, the leader of the badass vampire organization Black Dagger Brotherhood. Kinda reminds me of pure blood brotherhood from Sword of Truth, you know, the ones who were stealing nipples? Just as absurd. Anyway, Dark Lover's names look like taken from craptastic preteen fanfiction written by a mentally retarded goth wannabe. Here are the Goodreads and Amazon reviews:
"If you want a story that is 101 different ways to describe sex (with such awesome phrases as 'drilling her'), this is the book for you."
"His homeys consist of Tohrment, Rhage, Zsadist and Phury."
"'His abs looked like he was trying to smuggle paint rollers under his skin,' what?"
Wikipedia says there are also: Butch / Dhestroyer, Vishous, Rehvenge, Tohrment, Tehrror, Qhuinn.
(Okay, so we get it, all the guys are oh so sexy macho alpha males. Females are called Elizabeth, Bella, Mary Madonna Luce, Marissa, Cormia, Ehlena, etc. Just as appropriate.)
The main antagonist is called Mr X.
And now Polish version:
"Same imiona bohaterów mogą przyprawić o gęsią skórkę. Brzmią groźnie i dziko. Ale może konkrety: Ghrom, Vhredny, Furiath, Tohrtur, Hardhy, Zbihr, Mrokh, Hardkohr..."
The fact that this book has 4.26/5 average rating on GoodReads and 4.5/5 stars on Amazon is the undeniable proof of the horrific downfall of humanity and total brain deterioration. I understand that people may enjoy poorly written porn fanfiction, but to publish these childish wet fantasies? Puh-lease.