(no subject)
Its 2:30 in the morning, and I really should be working. I have a term paper due in 12 hours, and the amount I have written at this point is too embarassing to even write. As I'm sitting here in the library listening to some good old Jimmy, alone at my big table amongst the other last-minute exam studiers, I feel so incredibly alone. It happened in an instant, when both the people who were sitting with me left to catch some sleep.
I got the same feeling last night, when it was me who left the library early to trudge back to my dorm in darkness. You walked with me the whole way, though I don't know how much of that had to do with the fact that you left your car parked by Kistler. You asked me to walk with you to your car, and I did; partly because you asked, but mostly because I wanted to keep at bay for as long as possible the emotions I knew would be waiting for me alone in my dark room.
I didn't want to go up there and be alone. Not yet. Alone time is going to be too rampant in the summer; I wanted to squeeze every possible moment out of these last nights as I could, while I still have company wherever I go. Where meals are never solitary, and walks are never lonely. Where friends smile and gather in Kleiner, our meeting place that might as well have been the living room of our lives these past months. Walking in at any given time, I find someone there, waiting on our infamous couches. We've laughed there and we've cried there, thought about life and fought about the things that matter most to us. The all-nighters spent there, I couldn't begin to count them. When we sometimes worked and sometimes conversed, but mostly grew closer as friends. We probably wouldn't have needed the whole night to do our work had we not been sitting up with one another, but we wouldn't have it any other way. Then there were the nights when we had no work to do, staying up late anyway for no other reason than to enjoy each others company. You are my family, and my only hope is that you realize how much you mean to me. We ate together, walked together, and many times slept in the same place. We studied together, we partied together. We shared the stories of our lives and became better people through each other. But most importantly, we spent the year together. I cherish every moment we've spent, and know that we will be together again come fall. Or at least I hope. My heart aches at the mere thought of being without you guys and girls at home, planning my summer days and going out without you there. What a void there is going to be, and no real way to fill it. My friends won't be all within a mile of me, and our lives won't be contained within the bubbles of gv and grand rapids. So much harder to be surrounded by those you love. Everyone living so far apart. I'm going to miss the community, and the family. I'm going to miss the company, the energy of the campus. The way everything was in such close reach and in such a laid back atmosphere. But most of all, I'm going to miss you. I love you, grand valley family. Until next year...auf Wiedersehen!
I got the same feeling last night, when it was me who left the library early to trudge back to my dorm in darkness. You walked with me the whole way, though I don't know how much of that had to do with the fact that you left your car parked by Kistler. You asked me to walk with you to your car, and I did; partly because you asked, but mostly because I wanted to keep at bay for as long as possible the emotions I knew would be waiting for me alone in my dark room.
I didn't want to go up there and be alone. Not yet. Alone time is going to be too rampant in the summer; I wanted to squeeze every possible moment out of these last nights as I could, while I still have company wherever I go. Where meals are never solitary, and walks are never lonely. Where friends smile and gather in Kleiner, our meeting place that might as well have been the living room of our lives these past months. Walking in at any given time, I find someone there, waiting on our infamous couches. We've laughed there and we've cried there, thought about life and fought about the things that matter most to us. The all-nighters spent there, I couldn't begin to count them. When we sometimes worked and sometimes conversed, but mostly grew closer as friends. We probably wouldn't have needed the whole night to do our work had we not been sitting up with one another, but we wouldn't have it any other way. Then there were the nights when we had no work to do, staying up late anyway for no other reason than to enjoy each others company. You are my family, and my only hope is that you realize how much you mean to me. We ate together, walked together, and many times slept in the same place. We studied together, we partied together. We shared the stories of our lives and became better people through each other. But most importantly, we spent the year together. I cherish every moment we've spent, and know that we will be together again come fall. Or at least I hope. My heart aches at the mere thought of being without you guys and girls at home, planning my summer days and going out without you there. What a void there is going to be, and no real way to fill it. My friends won't be all within a mile of me, and our lives won't be contained within the bubbles of gv and grand rapids. So much harder to be surrounded by those you love. Everyone living so far apart. I'm going to miss the community, and the family. I'm going to miss the company, the energy of the campus. The way everything was in such close reach and in such a laid back atmosphere. But most of all, I'm going to miss you. I love you, grand valley family. Until next year...auf Wiedersehen!