Disconnected (TSCC)
Title: Disconnected
Authors: chosenfire28 & dhfreak
Fandom: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Prompt: #129 - Black Out
Word count: 1,185
Characters: John, Cameron (mentions of Riley)
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: 2.13 "Earthlings Welcomed Here"
Summary: John is losing hope and only Cameron can make him see that the future isn't lost.
Author's Notes: We are both doing our own tracks but we decided to do one together. This fic was written on YIM in roleplaying style. John is played by chosenfire28 and Cameron is played by dhfreak. Enjoy :D This fic was for tamingthemuse
John swallowed thickly as he leaned his head on the window feeling the cold glass against his skin. He closed his eyes and he remembered the lies she had told him. He wished he still had the lies.
Cameron stared at him curiously from the dining rooms pass-way. John had been betrayed, she knew that. Her mission was still intact. He must not lose hope. He must not lose the will to make his choice for the future.
He could feel her eyes on his back and his voice was soft “So is this what the future like?” he asked curiously his voice flat. “Do I get betrayed on a regular basis or was she special?” He snorted shaking his head.
Riley had been special.
She had been fake.
"No, not everyone is like Riley." She replied automatically. She had to be very careful with her words. This wasn't her John 'yet', what she did and said now would make him her John. It would mold him to the man that he was destined to become.
He pushed off from the wall turning to face her, his voice tight “Trusting people isn’t something I get to do is it?” He shook his head his lips turning into a bitter smile “Because I’m John Connor.” Sometimes he hated his own name; he hated everything that came with it. Sometimes he wished his dad had failed. That Cameron had failed. That John Connor would never exist in the future.
Because what he was doing right now, it wasn’t living. It was surviving and he was sick of it. The one time he had tried to get something for himself and it had turned it he had been played with like a toy by a girl from the future.
She looked at him blankly responding to his question. “No, you can’t really trust anyone for the fact that you are John Connor.” She could see his rage escalating. But the truth of it all was that it was the truth. Trust was an issue that John will never gain from the future. She knew that was humanities main weakness and he knew also.
“But you will have many friends, they will be loyal and follow you. But there will always be the ones that will make their own choices and they will take their own actions. Not everyone follows you John. They are ‘human’ after all”.
John gritted his teeth “I didn’t ask for anyone to follow me, I didn’t want it.” It was something he had often wondered. Why him? Why was he the leader of the Resistance? He didn’t want it. He had never wanted that life he had been told would be his.”
“John, you are stronger than what you think.” Cameron still looked at his back of his head as she walked slowly behind him. This was the reason future John send her. To make him understand why it’s him and not someone else. Why it’s him that has to lead an army against what she is.
He closed his eyes drawing comfort from her presence. His mom didn’t get this. Derek really didn’t get this. Why John needed Cameron? With her he was already that man everyone said he would be. She didn’t push him back to protect him from the future while claiming at the same time that he would do the protecting. She let him make decisions. She let him screw up.
She had let him be with Riley. Riley who had just been following orders. Who had no real feelings for him beyond her own desperation for his Uncle’s girlfriend to accept her.
“Yeah,” he muttered his shoulders feeling tight and his throat dry “I’m real strong.”
“You are the man that sends your father back in time. You send machines to protect you. You send me to help you get through this. If you weren’t strong, you wouldn’t have done those things.” She knew that Riley had hurt him. Had destroyed something in him. Riley was only the beginning. That is why she was here. Not only to protect him but to help him accept what he his and what he will become.
“John don’t keep it all inside. That is why I am here. To help you.” At those words she sounded more human than what she was.
“To help me.” His voice rose and he turned to face her “To help me do what. I man that sent his own father back so that he could die. Everyone around me dies. So how are you suppose to help me with that?” He shook his head looking at her desperately “What do you even know about helping people,” his voice softened “you’re not even human, you just do what you’re programmed to.”
“I am here to help you accept what’s to come John”. She didn’t break her eye contact from, “I am more human than you think John Connor. I am different John. Haven’t you notice?” She was now challenging him. That is what he needed now a challenge.
“What?” he asked confused.
“I not like other machines John. I am the very essence of a human. I am program to learn emotions and express myself throw what I learn like a child. You send me to grow up with you John emotionally and to support you. I understand what you are going through John because I am going through it to. I can feel. Do you want to feel how I feel John?” She wasn’t speaking like the robot anymore. She was speaking like the girl he had meet that first day at school.
He looked at her stunned and there was a hint of horror in his voice “Why would I do that?”
“Because this moment John. Because of the same question you asked me. Can you trust anyone? You have loyal friends, but the question is can you trust them to do the right thing.” She could see his confusion with horror in his face. But that is what it was. This was the truth.
He looked at her already shaking his head “No.” He brushed pass her and stood in front of the window again his eyes grim. One thing he had learned from his mother was he couldn’t trust anyone, he couldn’t trust anyone to let him do things his way.
She looked at him truly looked at him. “Remember John, the future is not written.” She turned around and headed towards the stairs. She had said all that needed to be said. It was up to him to him now.
He heard her go and his eyes locked on the stormy night outside a new determination filling him. He knew he would always need her, and not because he trusted her. Him needing her had nothing to do with trust. It had everything to do with the fact that when she looked at him she saw all the pieces of who he was and would be as a whole. He needed someone to see him as complete.
Not a work in progress.
Authors: chosenfire28 & dhfreak
Fandom: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Prompt: #129 - Black Out
Word count: 1,185
Characters: John, Cameron (mentions of Riley)
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: 2.13 "Earthlings Welcomed Here"
Summary: John is losing hope and only Cameron can make him see that the future isn't lost.
Author's Notes: We are both doing our own tracks but we decided to do one together. This fic was written on YIM in roleplaying style. John is played by chosenfire28 and Cameron is played by dhfreak. Enjoy :D This fic was for tamingthemuse
John swallowed thickly as he leaned his head on the window feeling the cold glass against his skin. He closed his eyes and he remembered the lies she had told him. He wished he still had the lies.
Cameron stared at him curiously from the dining rooms pass-way. John had been betrayed, she knew that. Her mission was still intact. He must not lose hope. He must not lose the will to make his choice for the future.
He could feel her eyes on his back and his voice was soft “So is this what the future like?” he asked curiously his voice flat. “Do I get betrayed on a regular basis or was she special?” He snorted shaking his head.
Riley had been special.
She had been fake.
"No, not everyone is like Riley." She replied automatically. She had to be very careful with her words. This wasn't her John 'yet', what she did and said now would make him her John. It would mold him to the man that he was destined to become.
He pushed off from the wall turning to face her, his voice tight “Trusting people isn’t something I get to do is it?” He shook his head his lips turning into a bitter smile “Because I’m John Connor.” Sometimes he hated his own name; he hated everything that came with it. Sometimes he wished his dad had failed. That Cameron had failed. That John Connor would never exist in the future.
Because what he was doing right now, it wasn’t living. It was surviving and he was sick of it. The one time he had tried to get something for himself and it had turned it he had been played with like a toy by a girl from the future.
She looked at him blankly responding to his question. “No, you can’t really trust anyone for the fact that you are John Connor.” She could see his rage escalating. But the truth of it all was that it was the truth. Trust was an issue that John will never gain from the future. She knew that was humanities main weakness and he knew also.
“But you will have many friends, they will be loyal and follow you. But there will always be the ones that will make their own choices and they will take their own actions. Not everyone follows you John. They are ‘human’ after all”.
John gritted his teeth “I didn’t ask for anyone to follow me, I didn’t want it.” It was something he had often wondered. Why him? Why was he the leader of the Resistance? He didn’t want it. He had never wanted that life he had been told would be his.”
“John, you are stronger than what you think.” Cameron still looked at his back of his head as she walked slowly behind him. This was the reason future John send her. To make him understand why it’s him and not someone else. Why it’s him that has to lead an army against what she is.
He closed his eyes drawing comfort from her presence. His mom didn’t get this. Derek really didn’t get this. Why John needed Cameron? With her he was already that man everyone said he would be. She didn’t push him back to protect him from the future while claiming at the same time that he would do the protecting. She let him make decisions. She let him screw up.
She had let him be with Riley. Riley who had just been following orders. Who had no real feelings for him beyond her own desperation for his Uncle’s girlfriend to accept her.
“Yeah,” he muttered his shoulders feeling tight and his throat dry “I’m real strong.”
“You are the man that sends your father back in time. You send machines to protect you. You send me to help you get through this. If you weren’t strong, you wouldn’t have done those things.” She knew that Riley had hurt him. Had destroyed something in him. Riley was only the beginning. That is why she was here. Not only to protect him but to help him accept what he his and what he will become.
“John don’t keep it all inside. That is why I am here. To help you.” At those words she sounded more human than what she was.
“To help me.” His voice rose and he turned to face her “To help me do what. I man that sent his own father back so that he could die. Everyone around me dies. So how are you suppose to help me with that?” He shook his head looking at her desperately “What do you even know about helping people,” his voice softened “you’re not even human, you just do what you’re programmed to.”
“I am here to help you accept what’s to come John”. She didn’t break her eye contact from, “I am more human than you think John Connor. I am different John. Haven’t you notice?” She was now challenging him. That is what he needed now a challenge.
“What?” he asked confused.
“I not like other machines John. I am the very essence of a human. I am program to learn emotions and express myself throw what I learn like a child. You send me to grow up with you John emotionally and to support you. I understand what you are going through John because I am going through it to. I can feel. Do you want to feel how I feel John?” She wasn’t speaking like the robot anymore. She was speaking like the girl he had meet that first day at school.
He looked at her stunned and there was a hint of horror in his voice “Why would I do that?”
“Because this moment John. Because of the same question you asked me. Can you trust anyone? You have loyal friends, but the question is can you trust them to do the right thing.” She could see his confusion with horror in his face. But that is what it was. This was the truth.
He looked at her already shaking his head “No.” He brushed pass her and stood in front of the window again his eyes grim. One thing he had learned from his mother was he couldn’t trust anyone, he couldn’t trust anyone to let him do things his way.
She looked at him truly looked at him. “Remember John, the future is not written.” She turned around and headed towards the stairs. She had said all that needed to be said. It was up to him to him now.
He heard her go and his eyes locked on the stormy night outside a new determination filling him. He knew he would always need her, and not because he trusted her. Him needing her had nothing to do with trust. It had everything to do with the fact that when she looked at him she saw all the pieces of who he was and would be as a whole. He needed someone to see him as complete.
Not a work in progress.