(Untitled)

[besomeothername]

[Lavi has set out a little booth out in the middle of the hallway. Gaudy, bright pink, and decorated with strands and strands of bright blinking Christmas lights. Hanging from the booth is the following sign:]

Now Taking Applications for Prince Charming

Must be:

• Well-mannered, kind, and all things prince-like
  
• Open minded
  
• Tolerant to physical

Comments

[halfcocked]

What is this, a play?

[besomeothername]

If you don't mind playing the part for the rest of your life. Or at least until after the wedding night.

[Taps his chin thoughtfully] I guess I should have got more details on that.

[halfcocked]

You want an actual prince?? . . . Just wait until one shows up, we have every other fucking thing here. I bet in two weeks we'll get Prince Tyki, riding on a white horse down the hallway and going all "Oh dear, this must be an illusion of Road, the Witch of the East!" Then two days later, Princess Allen Walker shows up in a dress . . .

[besomeothername]

As much as we'd all like to laugh at Allen in a dress, that's not what I'm looking for. My fair Lady specifically requested a prince.

Though the Prince Tyki is promising. How often do your predictions come true?

[halfcocked]

There's chick Allens too! And I never kept track. It's just that everything you can think of shows up here someday.

[besomeothername]

Of course. And she packs a punch. Literally. I think she could take out a wall by herself.

But I digress. [Points up to the sign] Interested in becoming a Prince Charming? The woodland creatures are very cute when they're not nesting in your hair.

[halfcocked]

[just . . . starts laughing PRETTY HARD]

[besomeothername]

I'll take that as a no.

[halfcocked]

You never met one of me, Bookman~?

[besomeothername]

Lavi.

And the princess is unconventional him- [cough cough] herself. The role of Prince Charming can be equally stretched.

[halfcocked]

Whatever. What is she, a chick with a dick?

[besomeothername]

Even better. A cursed chick with a dick.

[halfcocked]

[snorts] Cursed with a dick? That's no curse, that's good luck!

[besomeothername]

Oh? Is she looking more appealing to you then?

[halfcocked]

Hey! I didn't mean good luck for me, asshole! I'm taken anyway, so you're wasting your time.

[besomeothername]

[Props his chin in hand, grinning] Taken by who?