Fortnight
So it's been two weeks here in Indianapolis. I've been wondering what conclusions to draw. I'm not sure now is the time for conclusions - now is the time for beginnings, I guess, for finding the right questions, sifting through the noise to find the sound of things, to find their place.
Work is interesting. I figured it would be as much. I've met three of my twelve people so far, with more slated to come in as the week progresses. It's been a bit overwhelming, but at least now I'm beginning to recognize faces and to name names.
It turns out all the pretty girls on my floor are all married, or at the very least engaged. All of them. Down to a one. They work for a difference department, and I guess their boss - a heterosexual female, mind you - has a thing for attractive, young, spoken for women. Join the club, sister.
Not like it matters. Saves me potential collisions down the road, anyway. Best not to shit where you eat and all that.
Apart from that, the job is still frustratingly vague to me at this point. I mean, it's the same thing I did in Bloomington, but the structure is wildly different. All of the forms - it's like I know what they say and all once I comb through them, but they're shaped differently. Different format. I'm assured it will all click soon, but for now all I see is a mucky mess. In time, in time.
My apartment is shaping up. My resolution to keep it as clean as it was when I got there has been going well. I have too man boxes that really can't be unpacked due to lack of space, so I'm going to move a good bit of it downstairs once I can figure out how to meet the maintenance guy, the only person with a key.
My new clothes have been helpful in making me feel attractive. An oddly feminine thing to say. But a clean haircut, expensive leather shoes, new pants and polo shirts have really helped me to feel comfortable. I have to keep on top of that as well - time to cowboy up and to start looking like a grown-ass man.
I do find myself to be a bit bored. I don't really know anyone here. Or at least not yet. Another new coworker is throwing a party this Saturday night and I'm going to attend, of course, though I don't know what to expect, other than that he's married and lives in a supposedly fancy part of town, some place called Geist, which to me sounds like the name of a concentration camp.
I made out with this absolutely gorgeous girl on Saturday night at a club. She all but demanded me to. She gave me her number, called me after I texted her, but since then she's disappeared. Poof. At least I suspect that's the case. I was unsurprised at that outcome - after all, my guard is way up on all fronts - financial, job, personal, emotional - since moving, so I don't think it'll have any major effects.
I do have some small wonders about what's going to happen here. I wonder if I'll do well at my job, but I'm not letting it get in the way. It's like with the bonus program - so long as I take care to do my best every day, that will take care of itself.
Perhaps it's against my better judgment, but I threw some money into online dating again, figuring my recent move and genuinely not knowing anyone and all made for the perfect justification. It would seem that there are leads, but very few. I dunno - can't help but be myself, right? Inside and out, I mean? Eh - it's a soul-sucking way to meet people. I've done a good job keeping it in perspective, but if it becomes heart-wrenching at any point I'm going to drop it like a bad habit.
I still feel very positive and quite happy with things out here. Maybe that's why I haven't caught up in a while. Still think I made the right decision. Still think I'm going to really like life out here. Just have to keep my wherewithal. Just have to trust that I know what I'm doing, that I'm the captain of my own little ship.
Apart from that, not much to add. A rather profound radio silence Radio silence pervades.
Work is interesting. I figured it would be as much. I've met three of my twelve people so far, with more slated to come in as the week progresses. It's been a bit overwhelming, but at least now I'm beginning to recognize faces and to name names.
It turns out all the pretty girls on my floor are all married, or at the very least engaged. All of them. Down to a one. They work for a difference department, and I guess their boss - a heterosexual female, mind you - has a thing for attractive, young, spoken for women. Join the club, sister.
Not like it matters. Saves me potential collisions down the road, anyway. Best not to shit where you eat and all that.
Apart from that, the job is still frustratingly vague to me at this point. I mean, it's the same thing I did in Bloomington, but the structure is wildly different. All of the forms - it's like I know what they say and all once I comb through them, but they're shaped differently. Different format. I'm assured it will all click soon, but for now all I see is a mucky mess. In time, in time.
My apartment is shaping up. My resolution to keep it as clean as it was when I got there has been going well. I have too man boxes that really can't be unpacked due to lack of space, so I'm going to move a good bit of it downstairs once I can figure out how to meet the maintenance guy, the only person with a key.
My new clothes have been helpful in making me feel attractive. An oddly feminine thing to say. But a clean haircut, expensive leather shoes, new pants and polo shirts have really helped me to feel comfortable. I have to keep on top of that as well - time to cowboy up and to start looking like a grown-ass man.
I do find myself to be a bit bored. I don't really know anyone here. Or at least not yet. Another new coworker is throwing a party this Saturday night and I'm going to attend, of course, though I don't know what to expect, other than that he's married and lives in a supposedly fancy part of town, some place called Geist, which to me sounds like the name of a concentration camp.
I made out with this absolutely gorgeous girl on Saturday night at a club. She all but demanded me to. She gave me her number, called me after I texted her, but since then she's disappeared. Poof. At least I suspect that's the case. I was unsurprised at that outcome - after all, my guard is way up on all fronts - financial, job, personal, emotional - since moving, so I don't think it'll have any major effects.
I do have some small wonders about what's going to happen here. I wonder if I'll do well at my job, but I'm not letting it get in the way. It's like with the bonus program - so long as I take care to do my best every day, that will take care of itself.
Perhaps it's against my better judgment, but I threw some money into online dating again, figuring my recent move and genuinely not knowing anyone and all made for the perfect justification. It would seem that there are leads, but very few. I dunno - can't help but be myself, right? Inside and out, I mean? Eh - it's a soul-sucking way to meet people. I've done a good job keeping it in perspective, but if it becomes heart-wrenching at any point I'm going to drop it like a bad habit.
I still feel very positive and quite happy with things out here. Maybe that's why I haven't caught up in a while. Still think I made the right decision. Still think I'm going to really like life out here. Just have to keep my wherewithal. Just have to trust that I know what I'm doing, that I'm the captain of my own little ship.
Apart from that, not much to add. A rather profound radio silence Radio silence pervades.