Episode Two (but secretly three) of the Three Anti-OTP Whores of Angelic Debauchery

[archedies]

Session Start: Sun Jun 19 13:29:38 2005
Session Ident: #antiotp
* Now talking in #antiotp
Metatron: *shuffles into the kitchen as unobtrusively as possible, looking thoroughly dazed and blank, looking around quickly in an attempt to avoid actual human (or otherwise) interaction*
Famine: *was in the kitchen and...say, stepped out for a second through a side door, so comes back in and looks stunned* ... *hesitantly* ...Metatron?
Metatron: *flinches* ... *mumbles* Famine.
Famine: *stares, totally in shock* ...where...where have you been? Christ...what happened to you?
Metatron: *looks around frantically at anything but Famine* ...nothing. Please, leave me alone.
Famine: *blinks, then bites his lip, looking even more concerned and slightly hurt* ...it ISN'T nothing. Something's wrong. Something...bad. Please, tell me.
Metatron: *glares briefly at Famine, eyes literally bright red versus their original bright blue* No. You don't want to know. And I don't want to talk about it. All right?
Famine: ...*takes a step back at the eye colour change, looking completely thrown* ...I...*stares at Meta, looking a bit horrified* Angel, your *eyes*....
Metatron: *laughs bitterly* Yes. My eyes. ...*winces* You - *hisses* Don't call me that. Ever.
Famine: *looks startled and pained again, biting through his lip* ...all right...*straightens, expression completely lost* ...You...tell me what happened. Please.
Metatron: *glares again, bursting into blood red flame* Does it matter? Why do you even care, at this point?
Famine: *flinches at the flames, staring incredulously* ...*seems rather at a loss...and can you blame him?* ...I...of course it matters...why do I *care*? Why do you think I care?
Metatron: I don't know, why? This is partly your fault anyway. ...mostly mine, but - *pauses, looking slightly bewildered for a half-second* Look, do you -really- want to know? You'll be sorry you asked.
Famine: *looks...well, shattered for a second* *softly, almost to himself* ...my fault? *looks up with a small frown* ...yes. Yes, I do. I...I want to *help*.
Metatron: Yessss. Your fault. *tightens his hands into fists* ...Help? I seriously doubt that anyone could help at this point, but. Fine. You want to know what happened? I - *voice breaks* - ... I... I Fell, Famine.
Famine: *eyes widen with horror and takes a step back* ...you...you...oh God...*bites through his lip again and looks completely lost* ...-why-?
Metatron: *shakes his head fiercely* I am definitely not telling you that. You'll... you'll hate me even more... *sinks to his knees dazedly, staring at his hands* *quietly* Now will you leave me alone?
Famine: *ignores the last part and stares at Meta for a long time, then very slowly kneels down next to him, but not uncomfortably close* *softly* I don't hate you. I could never hate you. *continues tearing up his lip with his teeth and looks pained* ...I...Christ, Metatron, I'm so sorry...is...is there *anything* I can do?
Metatron: S-stop... you're - you're hurting yourself, please, don't, not over me... *stares dully at Famine* I don't know, Famine. You're... I - I... didn't I tell you? I was... never a very good angel, was I. Never. And now it's proven.
Famine: *stops immediately, looking pained again and absently licking the blood from his lip* *looks at Meta with a deeply lost expression* I...no, that isn't true...you're not...you can't be...oh, Metatron, how did this happen?
Metatron: Obviously it has to be true. Look at me, Famine. I've Fallen. *waves a hand weakly* I wasn't good enough. *shakes his head again, melting the tile beneath his fingertips slightly* It was - you - I... I'm... nothing. Please, don't.
Famine: *bites the inside of his cheek hard, clenching one hand into a fist tightly* I...*very tentatively reaches for Meta's shoulder with his other hand* ...I...I won't press it, if you don't want to...but...I wish there was something I could do....
Metatron: *shivers slightly* It's just that... it was -you-, Famine. It... I... I Fell because... of you.
Famine: *eyes widen* ... *stares in total disbelief, hand not leaving Meta's shoulder* ...because...of...*me*? *sounding distant and pained*
Metatron: No, I don't mean - *blinks, startled* Famine, I don't mean... it wasn't your fault, really, don't blame yourself, please. Please, it wasn't your fault. It was... because of you, but... not your fault. I mean it.
Famine: *frowns, still looking...well...guilty and pained and anxious* I...but...how...*trails off, resisting the urge to bite his lip* ...I'm not making this any better, am I...
Metatron: No, I... I can't decide if I want you to stay or... or leave, honestly, but... do you really want to be around me, now? Now that I'm... a demon? A demon who - who - Fell because... because...
Famine: *winces at that* ...I...I don't think there's anything you can say that would make me *not* wish to be around you. Especially when...you're obviously in pain. *squeezes Meta's shoulder very lightly*
Metatron: *shudders* But I... Fell... because... *stops abruptly* You don't really - don't really want to know. You'll be... disgusted with me.
Famine: *frowns and squeezes gently again* I...no...there's *nothing* you can say to change how I...how I view you. *closes his eyes and sighs, heavily and shakily, before opening them again* ...Look at me, please?
Metatron: ...fine. *looks up at Famine tentatively, eyes wide and still startlingly crimson* Yes...?
Famine: *bites his lip automatically, then releases it* *tentatively and gently touches Meta's hair, eyes not leaving his* I...you...don't have to tell me...but...I'm here. For you. Always. ...Whatever you need...anything I can do to help...to help this.
Metatron: *flushes slightly* I... just... thank you. *glances quickly up at Famine's hand on his hair before looking back at him* It's just... I Fell because I - I... *very softly* Because I... I wanted - want... you.
Famine: *eyes widen again, moving his hand off of Meta's hair just slightly in startlement* *'s expression falls open, revealing pain and anxiety and confusion and shock, and 's hand shakes slightly* I...you...*makes a quiet incoherent noise* ...-what-?
Metatron: I... one of the commandments, isn't it? Thou shalt not commit adultery... and I... I'm so so sorry, I didn't mean to, I just - started - having... feelings... towards - you, and - I... Fell. That's it. I'msosorry.
Famine: *continues staring with the same expression, shaking a bit* I...I...oh God...I...*voice breaks slightly* Why...are *you* apologizing to...to *me*?
Metatron: *buries his face in his hands, shaking* I didn't mean to... to make your life more complicated than - than it already is, I suppose, and... you don't exactly need a stupid angel in love with you. So... I'm sorry.
Famine: *...yeah, still staring, because...yes, more or less in shock* *pauses as he tries to formulate words, and more or less fails* I...*looks at Meta with full, confused eyes* *murmurs* ...ohgod... *leans a bit closer* ...Metatron...please...*closes his eyes and sighs* Please...don't be sorry.
Metatron: H-how can I not be...? I've... done the worst possible thing. I've Fallen for you. How... how stupid can one person possibly get? *drops his hands and stares at them in apparent surprise*
Famine: *opens his eyes to stare at Meta with pain and uncertainty* I...-no-...you aren't stupid. Please. Please...don't. You...you can't help the way you feel. *pauses and goes almost inaudibly quiet* ...and neither can I.
Metatron: *instantly looks up at Famine, rubbing tears out of his eyes* You... you... wh-what?!
Famine: *flushes darkly, eyes widening, and looks away quickly, automatically biting his lip, then letting go* *murmuring* Sorry...habit... *winces* *very softly* ...well...Horsemen can't fall...but if we could...*closes his eyes and winces again*
Metatron: I... you... you really... *tenses slightly* You really... and oh, you - here - *rises partway to kiss Famine quickly, healing his lip at the same time* ...there. *turns rather pink and looks off to the side embarrassedly*
Famine: *inhales sharply and tenses a bit upon being kissed, but leans into it a little, not quite kissing back but not moving away* *murmurs, looking stunned* Thank you... *continues looking at Meta for a while, then very gently takes Meta's chin in his hand and turns his head to face him* *quietly, with an intense expression* ...I'm sorry. I...really am.
Metatron: *stares at Famine in confusion* Sorry...? Why are you sorry? It's not... not your fault, you... I just... *absently blows the hair out of his eyes* Just... love you...
Famine: *wibbles...yes, actually wibbles* *clenches his fist tightly, then relaxes it and raises the hand to brush Meta's hair back, other hand still holding Meta's chin, and expression sad* *softly* You...I...I'm not worth that. I don't deserve your love.
Metatron: *blinks* Of - of course you do. You don't know... how often you've made me feel better, knocked sense into me, tried to help me, succeeded at helping me - just... you've been so kind to me, it's not... it's I who don't... don't...
Famine: *bites his tongue lightly, tears rising to his eyes* *softly, resting his hand on Meta's hair lightly* I...I'm glad I've been able to...that's...all I've wanted...*shakes his head, blinking back the tears* No...no, please. You're...*deep breath*...you're amazing. You're more than I deserve. Please...don't feel otherwise.
Metatron: M-matter of opinion, isn't it, then? I... I think you're amazing, and you think I am, and - well, I'm right, but... but... maybe we shouldn't argue about this. Just... oh, -Famine-, please don't cry. Please... *moves forward to kiss him, more firmly this time* Please be happy, with or without me.
Famine: *winces, then freezes again when he's kissed...pauses again, but this time actually kisses back* *pulls away a bit shakily, eyes full again, and moves his hand to touch Meta's cheek lightly* But...I...*very softly* I could *never* be happy without you.
Metatron: *looks startled, eyes widening* I... well - you... you see what I've given for you, and... I suppose that speaks for itself. If... if you're willing to, I - want... want to be with you. *swallows anxiously*
Famine: *winces a little, looking guilty and pained* I...*leans forward to kiss Meta's forehead gently, closing his eyes* I...I hope I can be worth that sacrifice. *leans down and cups Meta's face in his hands gently* I'm...this is...I'm not sure. *shakes his head, then leans in again* But I do know that...I want to be with you too. *kisses Meta gently*
Metatron: You've always been worth it, Famine. *kisses back hesitantly, closing his eyes and pressing closer to Famine* I... will you be all right with me, now that I'm - I'm... Fallen?
Famine: *sighs heavily and strokes Meta's hair lightly, looking at him with intensity* *softly* It doesn't matter. I'll...always...see you as an angel. *kisses again, running a finger down Meta's cheek* ...-my- angel.
Metatron: *stares at Famine in shock, slack-jawed* You... oh, -Famine-. I... *begins to shake with sudden sobs* I'm... look at me, at my - my wings and... my eyes and... but you're... too... *closes his eyes, letting the tears run down his cheeks*
Famine: *looks anxious and hesitantly wraps his arms around Meta's waist, holding him tightly* *raises one hand to gently wipe Meta's tears away, a few of his own falling, and kisses him once on each eyelid* *softly and shakily* You're a beautiful and amazing being, and you always will be.
Metatron: *hooks his arms around Famine's neck and buries his face in his chest, still shuddering with tears* I... I'm not, really, I'm just... just myself. And you're... you're so kind and - and you've given me so much, it's not... not fair of me to ask...
Famine: *holds on to Meta tighter, kissing the top of his head* You are yourself, my angel, and that's more than enough. And...you are asking nothing of me that I?m not willing to give. With all my heart.
Metatron: That's... that's the problem, I - I... how can I be a demon? It's just... *presses closer, if this is possible* Not... I never thought I would... but - at least - thank you so much, for... for being here and - being with me.
Famine: *holds Meta as closely as he can, closing his eyes and letting a few more tears slip out* I...can't imagine anywhere else I'd rather be. And...whenever you need me, I will be here. I swear it. *swallows and whispers very quietly* I love you.
Metatron: *shudders, struggling to stop his tears* You... I... I love you, too, so, so much, it's... I -- just... *pulls away slightly, having finally stopped crying, and kisses Famine soundly* *softly and hoarsely* Will... will things turn out all right?
*kisses back, holding Meta tightly, his own tears flowing unchecked* *touches Meta's cheek gently* They will. They...have to. *voice catches slightly* I'll -make- everything all right for you.
Famine... *leans forward and softly kisses the tears away from Famine's cheeks* The... even just that you're willing to -- to try, for... for me, is... is unbelievable. *shakes his head slightly, closing his eyes to hold back further tears*
*shivers slightly, closing his eyes as well* I...I would try anything...I would do anything...to see you happy...*opens his eyes again, looking down at Meta shakily, and gently kisses again*
You - oh, Famine... thank you... *kisses back more forcefully, tears still escaping his eyes, and braces a hand against Famine's thigh* ...just... thank you.
*continues holding Meta close and hugging him tightly* *gently brushes Meta's tears away and brushes his thumb over Meta's lower lip* *shakily* I love you...
*opens his eyes and stares at Famine, eyes wide and... perhaps slightly less red than before* And I - I love you... I... I might be a bit difficult for a while. I'm sorry... I just...
Famine: *notices, but doesn't mention it* *moves his hand to the back of Meta's neck, brushing past his cheek* It's all right, angel. I'll wait...as long as I have to. And I'll be here for you as long as you need me.
Metatron: Th-thank you - *tightens his grip around Famine slightly and buries his face in the hollow of Famine's neck, sobbing* Ijustcan'tbelievethatI... I Fell just - because of... I tried so hard to be a good angel, I did, I... I tried, but it wasn't... enough... was it?
Famine: *bites the inside of his cheek and hugs Meta tightly, closing his eyes* ...I don't know...I'm...I'm so sorry...if there was anything I could do, anything...I would die to give you the chance of Rising again...
Metatron: F-Famine, no, you... you shouldn't, it wouldn't... no, I just - I love you, don't... don't do anything for me. I want you happy, please... *kisses Famine's neck dazedly*
Famine: *shivers and hugs Meta closer, kissing his temple* *shakily* I...I love you, too. And...I *am* happy...here, with you. But...I can't be truly happy unless you are. I would do anything for you...*softly, brushing a hand up to Meta's cheek* I want to see you smile again, my angel...
Metatron: I... *swallows* I'll try, if - if it'll make you happy, if... *kisses Famine quickly* Because I just want you to be - to be happy, that's all, really, I mean... I don't know if I can just now, though.
Famine: *kisses back quickly and smiles faintly* Well, if we can both...try to be happy...for each others' sake...it'll work, I think. *brushes Meta's hair back* *softly* Take as long as you need. It'll be worth the wait.
Metatron: Yes, I - I think it will. I think... I can be happy, if - if I'm with you. *looks at the floor briefly, then back at Famine, and maybe... maybe smiles, just a little* Thank you.
Famine: *smiles gently and twines his fingers idly in Meta's hair* *softly* I'll have to see to it that I never leave you, then. *kisses Meta's forehead, then leans their foreheads together* *whispers* You deserve it. And so much more. *kisses*
Metatron: *returns the kiss almost feverishly, eyes half-closed* I don't... don't deserve anything, really. I'm... a demon. The lowest of the low. Th-the m-most... vile...
Famine: *places his fingertips firmly over Meta's mouth* *softly and laced with pain* Shhh. Please don't. You're an angel, and you always will be. *voice breaks slightly* A beautiful, golden, pure, loving, untarnished...-amazing- angel. That is how I'll always see you. Always.
Metatron: *quiet, murmuring noise of surprise* F-Famine... you... *struggling desperately not to cry again* How can you be so kind to me, you - all you do is give to me, and I've never... never given anything in return...
Famine: How? *softly* I love you. You deserve all I can give, and so much more. *leans his forehead against Meta's and continues in low, intense tones* You've given me your trust...you've given me a reason to smile, every day...you've given me...*voice drops*...your love.
Famine: *reaches for Meta's hand and takes it, twining their fingers together* ...you've given me yourself, haven't you? That's more than I have a right to ask for, my angel.
Metatron: *holds Famine's hand tightly, looking slightly at a loss for words* I - no, I'll... I'll give you anything, Famine, anything you ask for. Anything you need. Just ask, and... if I can, I'll give it. ...anything. *shudders and closes his eyes, still trying not to cry*
Famine: *draws his thumb gently over the back of Meta's hand, kissing his forehead gently* *softly* You. You're all I want. You're...everything. I...couldn't ask for more.
Metatron: *shudders violently and bites his lip as tears begin anew* ...'m sorry, I'm a bit out of sorts - *swallows* I don't... don't understand, I'm not... not that... wonderful. Especially now that - that...
Famine: *hugs Meta tighter with the arm still around his waist, squeezing his hand tightly* *softly* Don't apologize. *frowns, gently nuzzling Meta's forehead* ...you are. -I- think you are. And I could list reasons forever why I think so, but...it's something deeper, something inexplicable. But...it doesn't matter. I -love- you.
Famine: *raises Meta's hand to his lips and kisses it, squeezing lightly in turn* You're beautiful, first of all. Utterly stunning. Your hair...your face...your stature...your smile...you're the most gorgeous creature I've ever laid eyes on. Everything about you...I could look at you forever.
Famine: You're not stupid in the least...you're sweet and you can see into the hearts and minds of people. I can hide nothing from you...you're honest and open and true, and I feel completely exposed when you look at me. ...but you offer understanding, you offer guidance, you offer everything you have to give. You offer an incentive for people to -trust-.
Famine: You're an angel...*voice breaks slightly* Yes. No matter what...*brushes his fingertips over Meta's eyelashes lightly* You will always be...an ideal angel. You embody...purity, beauty, virtue...everything about you. *pauses slightly, as if trying to remember something*
Famine: ...faith. You've always had it. You try to make everything around you good...to lead everyone to do the right thing. You've never lost that. Nor have you lost hope...you always look on the bright side of things. You try to find good everywhere...and because you *are* the good, because you shed light and life and joy, you find it. Always.
Famine: Charity...you're the least selfish being I've met, ever. You do anything to spare others pain...you ask nothing for yourself. You give aid and spread goodness and never take anything away from others...you give the virtues you embody and the happiness that goes from knowing them.
Famine: Fortitude...you don't give up. If you find the spark of goodness in anyone...you won't let it go. You do what you can for everyone...and you never lose sight of what you want. Justice...no one has a stronger sense of right and wrong than you do. You have morals and you know what the right thing to do is...and you try to hold even those who are beyond saving to those standards. I admire your strength in it so much.
Famine: Prudence...you don't know much of the world, my angel, but you try to understand everything and act on what you know the right thing is. You take your morals and the circumstances into account, and you...do what you can. And more often than not, things come out all right.
Famine: Temperance...well, you've done nothing outrageous, as far as I know. You keep your emotions in check most of the time...I've not seen a great deal of wrath, unless the person truly deserved it. You never abuse your power, hold it over others...you never act as if you have anything special about you, when you're the most amazing being I've ever met. *brushes his fingers over Meta's cheek lightly*
Famine: And as if all of those weren't enough reason...plenty reason...more than enough reason for me to love you...you love me. You're here now...you've trusted me with your secrets, with your happiness, with your heart...that you are capable of that...towards a Horseman of the Apocalypse...it is far more than I deserve. That you are capable of such openness, such honesty, such love...angel...I can't help but adore you for it.
Metatron: *stares at Famine for a long, long while, eyes wide and shining bright blue again with tears and emotion* *very quietly* You... -fuck-, Famine, you... I c-can't -- *chokes on tears and closes his eyes tightly* ...I... *begins to shake violently, bursting into crimson flame* F-Fam.. ine... y-you -- you make it all worth it, everything, I - I... Falling, even - even losing my wings, if... if I had to, anything, everything, just... I'm not...
Metatron: *stops for a minute to lick the salt of tears from his lips* ...not... I don't -- I don't... I don't even know what t-to say, I just... loveyousomuchand... *pauses again, unable to speak for sobbing* ...if it wouldn't - wouldn't be too much trouble, could w-we just... stay like this for a while?
Metatron: *opens his eyes slowly, blinking quickly to try and see* I m-mean, if you don't mind, really, could you... please... just -- just -- hold me? Forever?
Famine: *watches Meta with eyes full, both with tears and emotion* *raises Meta's hand to his lips again, holding it there as he lets his other hand drift over Meta's hair, down the side of his face, across his jaw, and past his lips* *softly* I...hope I can be everything for you. Everything you deserve.
Famine: *slowly lets go of Meta's hand and wraps both arms around him, holding him tightly and kissing the top of his head* As long as you need me, my angel. I will be here for you, forever.
Metatron: *curls up against Famine, holding him tightly around the waist* You already are, Famine. You... always... have been. Even if - if you didn't know it. *shudders, trying and failing to stop his tears* I... just... th-thank you. Someday I'll... repay you for everything, for the countless things you've given me.
Famine: *hugs Meta tighter, closing his eyes against his own tears, letting them fall into Meta's hair* I...it means the world to me that...that you think so...*kisses the top of Meta's head* No...you, yourself, are more than enough. You're all I need.
Metatron: P-please don't cry, it's fine... and how could I think anything but? Just -- you, the way you are, you're... so... not perfect, maybe, but... but -- just... wonderfulamazingawe-inspiring. I... then let's just... *clings as tightly as he can, burying his face in Famine's chest* ...just stay here for a while.
Famine: I...can't help it...*blinks his tears back and nuzzles the top of Meta's head gently, murmuring against his hair* I feel so much, so strongly, and...and it's amazing and I never want to let it go...*holds on as tightly as HE can and would be clinging too but feels has to be the strong one, so just...holds tightly* *softly* We can stay here forever.
Metatron: *chokes slightly again* I... oh, Famine, I know exactly what you mean, I - honestly do. It's so... overwhelming. Wonderful. Wonderfully overwhelming, maybe? *shivers* I think I'm getting your clothes wet, I'm sorry...
Famine: *nods, smiling faintly, and kisses the top of Meta's head again* *murmurs* It's all that, and more. *laughs softly, bringing a hand up to gently lift Meta's chin* It's all right. I don't care. *bends and kisses Meta again*
Metatron: All right, g -- mmf! *kisses back fervently, fingers digging into Famine's sides slightly without him noticing* *smiles dizzily up at him through his tears* Good, because I'm trying to stop but I don't think I can just now.
Famine: *winces a little but tightens his grip on Meta's waist in turn* *smiles back, kissing Meta's eyelids gently* No hurry, angel. We're here forever, remember?
Metatron: *blinks in surprise and loosens his grip* Oh, I'm so sorry - *shivers* Right... forever. I never want to move... I know I have to someday, but I never want to.
Famine: It's all right. *smiles faintly and traces a finger up Meta's jawline* Well...we have time. Moving is...a long way away. *kisses lightly again* We have all the time we need.
Metatron: *kisses back dazedly* Yes... eternity, isn't it? *tired smile* We have... all the time in the world. *yawns slightly, then looks embarrassed* Sorry, I'm a little tired...
Famine: Right. *smiles, touching Meta's hair lightly, then laughs softly* It's all right, my angel. If you're tired, you should rest...
Metatron: Well... all right. *small, lopsided smile* Um... do you mind if I... *bites his lip* ...sleeponyou? I mean, if we're never going to move... or...
Famine: *looks startled, then flushes lightly and bends to kiss Meta lightly but lingeringly* Of course I don't mind. I'd like nothing better, actually. *small, crooked grin*
Metatron: *kisses back slowly before pulling back and smiling shyly* A-all right. *curls up with his head in Famine's lap, arms hooked loosely around Famine's waist* Th-thank you... for everything.
Famine: *smiles faintly and brushes Meta's hair back with one hand, letting the other trace down to rest loosely on his hip* *bends down to kiss Meta's cheek* You're welcome. And thank -you-. Sleep well, my angel.
Metatron: *murmurs* Mm'hmm. 'Night... or morning. Not sure what time it is. *shifts sleepily to make himself more comfortable* I love you...
Famine: *smiles tenderly, continuing to gently stroke Meta's hair* I love you too. *murmurs* Good night. I'm here for you...forever.
Metatron: *smiles* ...and I you. Forever. *makes a quiet, sleepy sound of contentment and closes his eyes, almost immediately slipping into a light sleep*