(no subject)
I realize it's been a long time since I've properly posted here so, I'm just post up my stories by fandom then make a master post...
Title: A Charlie Chaplin Finish
Characters: Dean, Sam
Summary: Dean gets one thing in common with Charlie Chaplin
Rating: G
Warning: none
Disclaimer:I don't own anything you recognize. They belong to big companies with expensive lawyers. I'm just borrowing for a little bit and making no money.
A/N: This is set between the fake hunt beginning and before we see the real Sam and Dean at the bar. (Where Dean hits on the “ghost” and fails because of “his fans.”)
The MC of the convention goes into the lobby and clears his throat in a way that gets everybody’s attention. “Ladies and gentlemen. Deans and Sams.”
This draws a chuckle from the crowd and an eye roll from Dean.
“In 30 minutes,” the MC continues, “the Dean and Sam look-a-like contests are going to start, with ‘Dean’ being the first to start. Since we don’t know what the brothers actually look like,”
There is a cough from Dean that sounds like “look here”
The MC continues without having heard him, “you’ll be rated on how well you represent the character with stuff like a totally Dean one liner and how you look. The Hunt will be stopped then for those of you who are worried. The winner of the Dean contest will be going to see a Metallica concert. Second place will receive a replica 1967 Chevy Impala that is 1:16th the scale of a real one. The third place person will receive an “authentic” Hunter’s licence. The winners of the Sam contest will receive a Sony laptop with a hunter`s guide to the myths and legends around the USA. Second place will receive a hunter`s guidebook and the third place will receive a `genuine`` Stanford law degree certificate. Carver Edlund will be one of the judges on both contests and we have selected certain fans to judge as well. Will those people please come see me right now? The rest of you go register, you have plenty of time.
The crowd disperses. Some rush to the table and some just mill around.
Dean turns to Sam with an excited look on his face. We have to enter.
“Why?” Sam asks.
“Come on, it`s Metallica tickets. Plus there`s no way we can’t best represent ourselves we’re the best at that and Chuck is judging so he has to give me 10.” Dean says.
“Yeah but on part of the contest is to come up with a ‘Dean’ quote.” Sam huffs.
“I know, pretty lame but this whole thing is pretty damn lame so why should this be any different?” Dean points out.
“Anyways, have fun. I don’t want to.”
“Spoilsport. Well I’m entering myself to represent myself.” Dean pauses to think about what he just said.
“Do you realize how weird that sounds?” Sam asks.
“Yeah,” Dean admits, “but it’s still not as strange as hunting the big bad wolf.”
* * * * * * * * * * * *
The Contest:
“Alright, ladies and gentlemen, wolves and ghouls. It’s time to start this contest. Put down the shotguns and rock salt, and come joins us in the main room.” A voice says over the PA.
Dean pokes Sam and puts on an excited smile, “come on, lets go.” He starts walking to the main room.
Sam follows, interested as to how this is going to turn out.
As they enter the room, they hear someone yell out “Deans onto the stage. Sams to the right of the stage.”
Dean turns to Sam with a joking smile “Wish me luck” and walks up to the stage, grabs his number and gets on the stage.
Sam just chuckles and finds a seat.
After all the ‘Deans’ are on the stage, the lights dim a little and there are lights pointing to the stage. The MC walks onto the stage “alright gentlemen. What you’re going to do is step forward, then deliver a typical Dean one liner then the judges,” He points to the table where Chuck is sitting between two females “are going to give you your score. When the winners are announced, they will step forward and get their prize from Becky here.” He gestured to Becky. “Alright, gentlemen enough of my talking. Onto the show.” He steps to the right of the stage. “Alright #1, step forward.”
The first guy steps forward. “Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cake hole.”
“Very nice, very nice.” The MC says before turning to the judges. “What did you guys think?”
The judges hold up their cards.
“Well, there’s a 7. A 9 from Chuck and another 10. Very good. Now, step back and let the second person have a go.”
The real Dean steps up to deliver the line that was his favourite ever. “Duude, you fugly.” He says while looking at Chuck with a charming smirk and a raised eyebrow.
“Alright judges, what did you think?” the MC asks and looks over. “Wow, okay that’s a 10, a 7 and another 10. What did you do to make Carver hate you like that?” The MC jokes. “Alright, onto the next person.”
Dean steps back and glares at Chuck.
Chuck flashes him a quick, cheeky grin.
The rest of contest passes in a boring blur for Dean
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
“Very nice score. Step back while the scores are tallied up and we’ll find out who the big winners are.” The MC tells the group.
*Five minutes later*
“Alright, I got here, in my hand, the results.” The MC says as he holds up the paper. He brings it down to read it. “Third place is… number 2. Go to Becky to get your “genuine” hunter’s license.”
Dean has a floored look on his face.
“Go on, get your prize.” The MC eggs Dean on.
Dean looks like he gets back into the zone and walks off the stage to Becky.
Becky giggles when Dean reaches her and starts looking for the license.
“Oh, shut up.” Dean says as he grabs the thing and stalks off.
Sam quickly catches up and opens his mouth to make fun of him.
Dean turns to point and glare at him. “You say anything and I will make the rest of your life a miserable experience. You will never know when I will strike and I will never tire or stop.”
“I was just gonna say that at least we’re licensed now.” Sam says with an innocent look on his face.
Dean harrumphs and walks off, mumbling something about needing a drink.
THE END
A/N #2: There is a story where Charlie Chaplin entered himself in a “Charlie Chaplin look-a-like” contest and he got third place. (I don’t know if it’s for sure true… but as far as I know, it is true…)
Title: Lawyer Jokes Part 1
Characters: Dean, Sam
Summary: Dean makes fun of Sam for going to be a lawyer
Rating: G
Warning: If you like lawyers, well, you're just weird... and this is cheesy so if you want to avoid the cheese, don't read
Disclaimer:I don't own anything you recognize. They belong to big companies with expensive lawyers. I'm just borrowing for a little bit and making no money.
Dean sits down one side of the booth and picks up the menu as Sam does the same. He and Sam simultaneous open their menus.
While perusing the menu, Dean looks up at Sam. “Want to hear a joke Sammy?”
“It’s Sam.” Sam says without looking up.
Dean ignores the correction. “What’s the difference between a road kill snake on the road and a road kill lawyer on the road?” At the word lawyer, Dean nudged Sam with his foot.
Sam tilts his head up so he’s glaring at Dean through his bangs.
“Come on, participate.” Dean says with a smile.
Sam lifts his head all the way up and tilts his forehead to the left. “What is the difference between the snake and the lawyer?” Sam asks with a deadpan voice.
“There’s skid marks in front of the snake.” Dean says before bursting out laughing.
Sam just rolls his eyes and goes back to reading his menu.
Title: Lawyer Jokes Part 2
Characters: Dean, Sam
Summary: Dean makes fun of Sam for going to be a lawyer
Rating: G
Warning: If you like lawyers, well, you're just weird... and this is cheesy so if you want to avoid the cheese, don't read
Disclaimer:I don't own anything you recognize. They belong to big companies with expensive lawyers. I'm just borrowing for a little bit and making no money.
Dean shifts in his seat, making the chair squeak.
“Stop moving,” Sam orders him.
“I’m bored and my ass is sore.” Dean complains. “It’s boring doing research.”
“Then get out of the motel and go for a drive or something.” Sam offers, looking up from his laptop.
“Then you’re going to be left alone with the research and I can’t do that to my little bro.” Dean says innocently.
“Yeah… but…” Sam says, exasperated. “Whatever.”
There is a blessed silence from Dean.
“Want to hear a joke?” Dean’s voice breaks silence a few moments later.
Sam knows when Dean is bored of the research, he will keep bugging him until he gives in. “Sure”
“Why don’t sharks attack lawyers?” Dean says, grin evident on his face, even if Sam can’t see his face.
“I don’t want to hear another lawyer joke,” Sam says sternly.
“Well, I want to tell you one.” Dean says nicely, “Sharks don’t attack…”
“Well, I’m not listening.” Sam says before plugging his ears “La la la la…”
Dean tackles Sam to the ground. Plastering himself on Sam to prevent Sam from getting up.
Sam then uses his height and flips Dean over.
Dean uses the momentum and keeps the roll going to stay on top. He then uses his strength to keep Sam down, despite Sam’s struggles. After a few minutes of struggling, Sam stops.
“I give up,” Sam says, “Uncle.”
Dean leans in, bringing his face close to Sam’s. “The reason sharks don’t attack lawyers is,” Dean pauses for effect “for professional courtesy.” Dean grins and gets off of Sam. He gets up and continues doing research like nothing happened.
Sam is left exasperated on the floor.
Title: A Charlie Chaplin Finish
Characters: Dean, Sam
Summary: Dean gets one thing in common with Charlie Chaplin
Rating: G
Warning: none
Disclaimer:I don't own anything you recognize. They belong to big companies with expensive lawyers. I'm just borrowing for a little bit and making no money.
A/N: This is set between the fake hunt beginning and before we see the real Sam and Dean at the bar. (Where Dean hits on the “ghost” and fails because of “his fans.”)
The MC of the convention goes into the lobby and clears his throat in a way that gets everybody’s attention. “Ladies and gentlemen. Deans and Sams.”
This draws a chuckle from the crowd and an eye roll from Dean.
“In 30 minutes,” the MC continues, “the Dean and Sam look-a-like contests are going to start, with ‘Dean’ being the first to start. Since we don’t know what the brothers actually look like,”
There is a cough from Dean that sounds like “look here”
The MC continues without having heard him, “you’ll be rated on how well you represent the character with stuff like a totally Dean one liner and how you look. The Hunt will be stopped then for those of you who are worried. The winner of the Dean contest will be going to see a Metallica concert. Second place will receive a replica 1967 Chevy Impala that is 1:16th the scale of a real one. The third place person will receive an “authentic” Hunter’s licence. The winners of the Sam contest will receive a Sony laptop with a hunter`s guide to the myths and legends around the USA. Second place will receive a hunter`s guidebook and the third place will receive a `genuine`` Stanford law degree certificate. Carver Edlund will be one of the judges on both contests and we have selected certain fans to judge as well. Will those people please come see me right now? The rest of you go register, you have plenty of time.
The crowd disperses. Some rush to the table and some just mill around.
Dean turns to Sam with an excited look on his face. We have to enter.
“Why?” Sam asks.
“Come on, it`s Metallica tickets. Plus there`s no way we can’t best represent ourselves we’re the best at that and Chuck is judging so he has to give me 10.” Dean says.
“Yeah but on part of the contest is to come up with a ‘Dean’ quote.” Sam huffs.
“I know, pretty lame but this whole thing is pretty damn lame so why should this be any different?” Dean points out.
“Anyways, have fun. I don’t want to.”
“Spoilsport. Well I’m entering myself to represent myself.” Dean pauses to think about what he just said.
“Do you realize how weird that sounds?” Sam asks.
“Yeah,” Dean admits, “but it’s still not as strange as hunting the big bad wolf.”
* * * * * * * * * * * *
The Contest:
“Alright, ladies and gentlemen, wolves and ghouls. It’s time to start this contest. Put down the shotguns and rock salt, and come joins us in the main room.” A voice says over the PA.
Dean pokes Sam and puts on an excited smile, “come on, lets go.” He starts walking to the main room.
Sam follows, interested as to how this is going to turn out.
As they enter the room, they hear someone yell out “Deans onto the stage. Sams to the right of the stage.”
Dean turns to Sam with a joking smile “Wish me luck” and walks up to the stage, grabs his number and gets on the stage.
Sam just chuckles and finds a seat.
After all the ‘Deans’ are on the stage, the lights dim a little and there are lights pointing to the stage. The MC walks onto the stage “alright gentlemen. What you’re going to do is step forward, then deliver a typical Dean one liner then the judges,” He points to the table where Chuck is sitting between two females “are going to give you your score. When the winners are announced, they will step forward and get their prize from Becky here.” He gestured to Becky. “Alright, gentlemen enough of my talking. Onto the show.” He steps to the right of the stage. “Alright #1, step forward.”
The first guy steps forward. “Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cake hole.”
“Very nice, very nice.” The MC says before turning to the judges. “What did you guys think?”
The judges hold up their cards.
“Well, there’s a 7. A 9 from Chuck and another 10. Very good. Now, step back and let the second person have a go.”
The real Dean steps up to deliver the line that was his favourite ever. “Duude, you fugly.” He says while looking at Chuck with a charming smirk and a raised eyebrow.
“Alright judges, what did you think?” the MC asks and looks over. “Wow, okay that’s a 10, a 7 and another 10. What did you do to make Carver hate you like that?” The MC jokes. “Alright, onto the next person.”
Dean steps back and glares at Chuck.
Chuck flashes him a quick, cheeky grin.
The rest of contest passes in a boring blur for Dean
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
“Very nice score. Step back while the scores are tallied up and we’ll find out who the big winners are.” The MC tells the group.
*Five minutes later*
“Alright, I got here, in my hand, the results.” The MC says as he holds up the paper. He brings it down to read it. “Third place is… number 2. Go to Becky to get your “genuine” hunter’s license.”
Dean has a floored look on his face.
“Go on, get your prize.” The MC eggs Dean on.
Dean looks like he gets back into the zone and walks off the stage to Becky.
Becky giggles when Dean reaches her and starts looking for the license.
“Oh, shut up.” Dean says as he grabs the thing and stalks off.
Sam quickly catches up and opens his mouth to make fun of him.
Dean turns to point and glare at him. “You say anything and I will make the rest of your life a miserable experience. You will never know when I will strike and I will never tire or stop.”
“I was just gonna say that at least we’re licensed now.” Sam says with an innocent look on his face.
Dean harrumphs and walks off, mumbling something about needing a drink.
THE END
A/N #2: There is a story where Charlie Chaplin entered himself in a “Charlie Chaplin look-a-like” contest and he got third place. (I don’t know if it’s for sure true… but as far as I know, it is true…)
Title: Lawyer Jokes Part 1
Characters: Dean, Sam
Summary: Dean makes fun of Sam for going to be a lawyer
Rating: G
Warning: If you like lawyers, well, you're just weird... and this is cheesy so if you want to avoid the cheese, don't read
Disclaimer:I don't own anything you recognize. They belong to big companies with expensive lawyers. I'm just borrowing for a little bit and making no money.
Dean sits down one side of the booth and picks up the menu as Sam does the same. He and Sam simultaneous open their menus.
While perusing the menu, Dean looks up at Sam. “Want to hear a joke Sammy?”
“It’s Sam.” Sam says without looking up.
Dean ignores the correction. “What’s the difference between a road kill snake on the road and a road kill lawyer on the road?” At the word lawyer, Dean nudged Sam with his foot.
Sam tilts his head up so he’s glaring at Dean through his bangs.
“Come on, participate.” Dean says with a smile.
Sam lifts his head all the way up and tilts his forehead to the left. “What is the difference between the snake and the lawyer?” Sam asks with a deadpan voice.
“There’s skid marks in front of the snake.” Dean says before bursting out laughing.
Sam just rolls his eyes and goes back to reading his menu.
Title: Lawyer Jokes Part 2
Characters: Dean, Sam
Summary: Dean makes fun of Sam for going to be a lawyer
Rating: G
Warning: If you like lawyers, well, you're just weird... and this is cheesy so if you want to avoid the cheese, don't read
Disclaimer:I don't own anything you recognize. They belong to big companies with expensive lawyers. I'm just borrowing for a little bit and making no money.
Dean shifts in his seat, making the chair squeak.
“Stop moving,” Sam orders him.
“I’m bored and my ass is sore.” Dean complains. “It’s boring doing research.”
“Then get out of the motel and go for a drive or something.” Sam offers, looking up from his laptop.
“Then you’re going to be left alone with the research and I can’t do that to my little bro.” Dean says innocently.
“Yeah… but…” Sam says, exasperated. “Whatever.”
There is a blessed silence from Dean.
“Want to hear a joke?” Dean’s voice breaks silence a few moments later.
Sam knows when Dean is bored of the research, he will keep bugging him until he gives in. “Sure”
“Why don’t sharks attack lawyers?” Dean says, grin evident on his face, even if Sam can’t see his face.
“I don’t want to hear another lawyer joke,” Sam says sternly.
“Well, I want to tell you one.” Dean says nicely, “Sharks don’t attack…”
“Well, I’m not listening.” Sam says before plugging his ears “La la la la…”
Dean tackles Sam to the ground. Plastering himself on Sam to prevent Sam from getting up.
Sam then uses his height and flips Dean over.
Dean uses the momentum and keeps the roll going to stay on top. He then uses his strength to keep Sam down, despite Sam’s struggles. After a few minutes of struggling, Sam stops.
“I give up,” Sam says, “Uncle.”
Dean leans in, bringing his face close to Sam’s. “The reason sharks don’t attack lawyers is,” Dean pauses for effect “for professional courtesy.” Dean grins and gets off of Sam. He gets up and continues doing research like nothing happened.
Sam is left exasperated on the floor.