Hmm...
Being fake, wearing these masks, is becoming quite exhausting and somewhat depressing.
Faking happiness, feigning ignorance, falsifying my levels of care and interest... The escapes aren't even escapes anymore, just extensions.
It felt like it was working for a while but that was just me lying to myself. I still deny the idea that trying to lie to oneself is the way to happiness(brainwashing). It's a line fed to me by family. As it stands, I say happiness doesn't come until fortune 'decides' to bathe you in its light. Working towards it just leads to more strife when key components simply aren't there. How nice that some have the ability to pick up their sword and shield alone. To do something like that, one needs to have gone through too much too early on or already have truly helpful tools in their inventories.
Somewhat unrelated, this thought passed by while driving to a meeting in Reading. I tend to overdo everything in life. No, I don't overachieve, I simply overdo. The whole drive was pretty much retrospection supporting that notion. Despite my years of introspection, I'd never really honed in on that fact. It's a positive trait in some cases but not many... at least, not many that count.
Faking happiness, feigning ignorance, falsifying my levels of care and interest... The escapes aren't even escapes anymore, just extensions.
It felt like it was working for a while but that was just me lying to myself. I still deny the idea that trying to lie to oneself is the way to happiness(brainwashing). It's a line fed to me by family. As it stands, I say happiness doesn't come until fortune 'decides' to bathe you in its light. Working towards it just leads to more strife when key components simply aren't there. How nice that some have the ability to pick up their sword and shield alone. To do something like that, one needs to have gone through too much too early on or already have truly helpful tools in their inventories.
Somewhat unrelated, this thought passed by while driving to a meeting in Reading. I tend to overdo everything in life. No, I don't overachieve, I simply overdo. The whole drive was pretty much retrospection supporting that notion. Despite my years of introspection, I'd never really honed in on that fact. It's a positive trait in some cases but not many... at least, not many that count.