Home sick like a drunk puppy missing his momma.....
This will be my second Yule away from home, as I am in my new home in Cali. I never appreciated how much my community and family meant to me until I no longer had them surrounding me. The holidays were always a big deal with my family. We would always go to my grandparents house on christmas eve, catch up on the events of the year, open presents, laugh, and eat great food. Gramma always made sure there was a spiral cut ham from the Honey-Baked Ham company and lots of her homemade mac n cheese. Shannon (my sister) and I would that night convincing my mom and step dad to let us open the gifts under the christmas tree when we would get home late that night after the festivities, and would wake up to sausage gravy and biscuits and a white christmas morning. My step father's mother, (my grandma Oddie we use to call her) would always go out of her way to ship us the most amazing gifts, ensuring that we would have the best christmas possible. She would always ship us peanut brittle from See's candy company and several logs of Tillamook Cheese. Tillamook is the town my step father grew up in, so getting the cheese was always a big deal for us as it is off the hook awesome.
As I grew older I got involved with the pagan community more and Yule became the time in which we would all gather at someones house and do ritual, eat till we couldn't eat anymore, and drink until we couldn't stand. It was always so great to see those pagans I only got to see at yule and on the summer festival circuit. Four years ago I started going to Yule at Heather's house. Heather being a dear coven sister of mine from Ohio. She always dresses in the most beautiful leopard print dress with white trimming, her hair up, and some of THE MOST BEAUTIFUL jewelery you could ever imagine. People from all over would come over to her place on Yule, and we would turn her living room into a ritual space, sometimes there were so many people we had people spilling over into the Kitchen. We would sing and pray, commune with the great spirits, and party after wards. Heather and I would end up putting on a pot of coffee, and talking all night that night as we would hold vigil for the new born sun. We then would go out and watch the rising sun and then scry into the clouds and make predictions for the coming cycle.
I would end up back at heathers on New years eve where she throws another great party. Before I would get my drink on I would do readings for those people there at her place and take donations as we would raise money for a needy family, or a coven project. Following would be lots of drinking (we love this), lots of pool, and discussing magical philosophy with druids, heathens, Wiccans, eclectics, and more.
Now my beloved gramma Oddie has passed some years ago. My sister has a family of her own and lives in Georgia. My grandparents are old and ailing, and my mother and step father are on their own for christmas. Life goes on without you, and I have to say I am now so aware of that. I miss my family, I miss my friends, I miss the Yules and Christmases of the days of old. This year there will be a small ritual after work on Monday, dinner at Storm's mother's place (which is always a treat), and on christmas morning I will be enjoying the first day off the three of us have had together since February. Nothing is like it was. I am happy for what I do have this season but feeling that something just is not quite right all at the same time. I wont be partying with my pagans, scrying into the eastern morning sky with my closest friend, eating biscuits and gravy with my mother, step father, or sister, nor will I be feeling the community I once did. I miss these things, I miss these people, and I miss the way they made me feel.
Yule will go on, another year will pass, and nothing is as it once was.
As I grew older I got involved with the pagan community more and Yule became the time in which we would all gather at someones house and do ritual, eat till we couldn't eat anymore, and drink until we couldn't stand. It was always so great to see those pagans I only got to see at yule and on the summer festival circuit. Four years ago I started going to Yule at Heather's house. Heather being a dear coven sister of mine from Ohio. She always dresses in the most beautiful leopard print dress with white trimming, her hair up, and some of THE MOST BEAUTIFUL jewelery you could ever imagine. People from all over would come over to her place on Yule, and we would turn her living room into a ritual space, sometimes there were so many people we had people spilling over into the Kitchen. We would sing and pray, commune with the great spirits, and party after wards. Heather and I would end up putting on a pot of coffee, and talking all night that night as we would hold vigil for the new born sun. We then would go out and watch the rising sun and then scry into the clouds and make predictions for the coming cycle.
I would end up back at heathers on New years eve where she throws another great party. Before I would get my drink on I would do readings for those people there at her place and take donations as we would raise money for a needy family, or a coven project. Following would be lots of drinking (we love this), lots of pool, and discussing magical philosophy with druids, heathens, Wiccans, eclectics, and more.
Now my beloved gramma Oddie has passed some years ago. My sister has a family of her own and lives in Georgia. My grandparents are old and ailing, and my mother and step father are on their own for christmas. Life goes on without you, and I have to say I am now so aware of that. I miss my family, I miss my friends, I miss the Yules and Christmases of the days of old. This year there will be a small ritual after work on Monday, dinner at Storm's mother's place (which is always a treat), and on christmas morning I will be enjoying the first day off the three of us have had together since February. Nothing is like it was. I am happy for what I do have this season but feeling that something just is not quite right all at the same time. I wont be partying with my pagans, scrying into the eastern morning sky with my closest friend, eating biscuits and gravy with my mother, step father, or sister, nor will I be feeling the community I once did. I miss these things, I miss these people, and I miss the way they made me feel.
Yule will go on, another year will pass, and nothing is as it once was.