(no subject)
Im so confused right now. My life is shit. Nothing will ever go right for me. I wish i could live like a normal kid doing normal things. I want to go to regular school like regular kids. I want to get good grades like a regular kid. I want to have money like a regular kid. I want a car like a normal 17 almost 18 year old normal kid. Everything in my life will never be normal. I want a normal FAMILY the most. You dont know what its like to live 17 years without a father or a mother. My mother was always working and NEVER spent time with me on her days off. She was always out fucking around with guys. Its always been MED 1st. That will never change. My father is like any other father. He was never there. He wasnt there for 11 years and then he pops up and expects me to let him in. Of course i do and what happens i get abused the whole time i live with him. Watch my step mother go through the same thing along with my real mother. I come back hoping things will change with me and my mother. Comes to find out her new husband is like every other father figure in my life ausive. My grandmother dosnt do anything about is. You want to know who actually does something about is. A girl that i never thought i would be close to. I have a best friend of 6 years and he didnt do not a damn thing. The only person who did was maia. I never thought me and her would be as close as we are now. I thought it was gonna be like any other relationship. We go out for 2 weeks and then i get dumped. But i fell fast. I have never liked someone so much. She is my 1st LOVE. As time went by and we began to talk more and more i fall deeper and deeper. Then im told we have to move to NC. I was crushed. I thought i would never see her again. We got into a big fight while i was up there i fucked everthing up with us for good i thought. We didnt talk for like 3 months. I called her one day to find out she still liked me. Who knew the girl i meet 2 summers ago would be the love of my life. I love maia so much. Everything that has happened that was bad just made us alot more closer i dont know why. Love is strange. But its the best feeling in the world to love someone and have them love you back.