happiness is found and lost here(o)in..
"it's kinda like this. dad worked in a factory and mum in a hospital so my life was kinda planned out before even I realised it. and the fact that standing there, doing everything wrong, blood running down my right pinkie finger from the gash I've just inflicted on it, looking at the pain throb and feeling nothing. not pain or annoyance or fear just a desensitised acceptance that this is normality. most of what I do I work is wrong, or substandard, or incorrect or not acceptable, or faulty or incomplete, or just simply bad.
I could apologise for this but I think I'd have to start apologising for being first. best intentions and trying hard don't account for much. I could always do more. the extra mile never reached, the understanding never achieved. I know I'm pretty slow when it comes to my job. stuff I don't really understand I get by simply by being quiet. Like River says "I understand, I don't comprehend". A nice way of putting it.
I do what I can by working hard. not well, just hard. So i'll haul the trash (an occupation I've undertaken in almost every job I've ever had) and clean and scrub as best I can and work the cerner to the best of my ability and keep my mouth shut. and as for the rest? i'll keep going until there's nothing left to give. and then that will be the end.
Dee (name used in work for the benefit of others)"
cross-posted between here and facebook.
I could apologise for this but I think I'd have to start apologising for being first. best intentions and trying hard don't account for much. I could always do more. the extra mile never reached, the understanding never achieved. I know I'm pretty slow when it comes to my job. stuff I don't really understand I get by simply by being quiet. Like River says "I understand, I don't comprehend". A nice way of putting it.
I do what I can by working hard. not well, just hard. So i'll haul the trash (an occupation I've undertaken in almost every job I've ever had) and clean and scrub as best I can and work the cerner to the best of my ability and keep my mouth shut. and as for the rest? i'll keep going until there's nothing left to give. and then that will be the end.
Dee (name used in work for the benefit of others)"
cross-posted between here and facebook.