(no subject)
I am so weird about anything post-life. I try to talk to my friends, but I find myself not paying attention to what they have to say.
I try to grasp memories and hold onto people that I once used to know but I don't have enough will to - (and neither does he).
I even do weird things like bundle my hair up and twirling it into a knot, concidering a serious haircut.
I should go to bed though I haven't even done my homework. I'm not a homework type of guy though... eh what kind of excuse is that?
I just shut my eyes for a moment and ten minutes have passed. I must be tired, probably exhausted but I don't know why. I even have a movie on.
I miss Zen's body next to mine, when he's naked and warm. I love hearing him laugh in my ear and mumble about his day. His voice smiles the entire time. I don't know. I think too much about him I guess, but I know he doesn't mind.
I did some great thinking today.. I talked to a friend who asked how long Zen and I have been together now. Zen reminded me, like he always does every year, that our 2nd anniversary is coming up. It's amazing how I can say that. For two years allows me to use words like 'every' and 'always'. Two years is a very long time... sitting here reading the conversations between the two little boys back then.. gosh, I'm smiling like an idiot.
12/1/2005 8:48:19 PM ][Zen][ Someone stop my heart, stop it from killing all the love I have. Don't finish to inhale, start to exhale: Well, erm I still have hours until I have to go to bed but I er uhh...just wanted to know...Takeshi will you be my boyfriend?
12/1/2005 8:49:28 PM [ нaĸυеί^(sn) 山崎武] + So I guess I asked for too much Yes *nods* God, yes.
<3 I love you.
I try to grasp memories and hold onto people that I once used to know but I don't have enough will to - (and neither does he).
I even do weird things like bundle my hair up and twirling it into a knot, concidering a serious haircut.
I should go to bed though I haven't even done my homework. I'm not a homework type of guy though... eh what kind of excuse is that?
I just shut my eyes for a moment and ten minutes have passed. I must be tired, probably exhausted but I don't know why. I even have a movie on.
I miss Zen's body next to mine, when he's naked and warm. I love hearing him laugh in my ear and mumble about his day. His voice smiles the entire time. I don't know. I think too much about him I guess, but I know he doesn't mind.
I did some great thinking today.. I talked to a friend who asked how long Zen and I have been together now. Zen reminded me, like he always does every year, that our 2nd anniversary is coming up. It's amazing how I can say that. For two years allows me to use words like 'every' and 'always'. Two years is a very long time... sitting here reading the conversations between the two little boys back then.. gosh, I'm smiling like an idiot.
12/1/2005 8:48:19 PM ][Zen][ Someone stop my heart, stop it from killing all the love I have. Don't finish to inhale, start to exhale: Well, erm I still have hours until I have to go to bed but I er uhh...just wanted to know...Takeshi will you be my boyfriend?
12/1/2005 8:49:28 PM [ нaĸυеί^(sn) 山崎武] + So I guess I asked for too much Yes *nods* God, yes.
<3 I love you.