again with the...
I suppose everybodies lives are characterized, in some part, by reoccuring themes, but mine is like being trapped on a psychodelic merry-go-round that plays the same six bad pop songs at astronomical volume in a continuous loop. I am again, considering the meaning of an old, old, old, relationship.
I'm going to take the unpopular position hear and declare that one should not be friends with an ex love(er). I mean NEVER, even if it seems like a good idea at the time. The fall out is just too ridiculous. Even if it's not dramatic, I think it is persistent and subtle. Even if we deal with it and deal with it well. I suppose some will say it's a necessary trade-off. We deal with the slightly hurtful reality of this person in the new capacity so that we get to keep them in our lives/be in theirs, but at a certain point isn't it just better to have a clean slate? To put the past, in the past and move on? No matter what anyone says, I think this is impossible to do when you have to deal with the ex-this, now-that person all the time. And it's not like anyone has to do anything malicious or even careless. Sometimes it's the kid-gloves that are the most hurtful part.
It's just not simple. It can never be simple and fresh and new and harmless to interact with the ex-this-now-that. And to the neigh-sayers (I know you're out there) It's not that I'm still in love with the guy, or that I don't like who he is/ has become, it's just that I'm too invested. It takes so much energy to seperate out all the feelings associated with the bugger. Still we associate--out of affection, out of fear, because we're star-crossed and masochistic--out of habit.
My conclusion (and I'm sticking with the one I came to when I was fourteen) is that I hate boys because they're stupid.
This conviction is, of course, not useful in any way.
I'm going to take the unpopular position hear and declare that one should not be friends with an ex love(er). I mean NEVER, even if it seems like a good idea at the time. The fall out is just too ridiculous. Even if it's not dramatic, I think it is persistent and subtle. Even if we deal with it and deal with it well. I suppose some will say it's a necessary trade-off. We deal with the slightly hurtful reality of this person in the new capacity so that we get to keep them in our lives/be in theirs, but at a certain point isn't it just better to have a clean slate? To put the past, in the past and move on? No matter what anyone says, I think this is impossible to do when you have to deal with the ex-this, now-that person all the time. And it's not like anyone has to do anything malicious or even careless. Sometimes it's the kid-gloves that are the most hurtful part.
It's just not simple. It can never be simple and fresh and new and harmless to interact with the ex-this-now-that. And to the neigh-sayers (I know you're out there) It's not that I'm still in love with the guy, or that I don't like who he is/ has become, it's just that I'm too invested. It takes so much energy to seperate out all the feelings associated with the bugger. Still we associate--out of affection, out of fear, because we're star-crossed and masochistic--out of habit.
My conclusion (and I'm sticking with the one I came to when I was fourteen) is that I hate boys because they're stupid.
This conviction is, of course, not useful in any way.