(no subject)
what will it take to get this heavy feeling off my chest? being more aware of what causes the heaviness, and not knowing how to handle it, makes me more reclusive than ever. don't do this. don't do that. i'm so vulnerable that doing any thing sounds like a bad idea. i'm not even a person any more. even my once closest friend doesn't like me any more (reasonably so). --one of the ones who know me the most.-- why would they like me any more?-- let alone be any where near a favorite of theirs. only in convenience. what does that say? square one. when the time is right i'll be whole again. i'll be able to start something new. going back is not an option. i'm not a person there. i was wrong to think that i could be a person there. but i'm not even wanted so how could that ever happen? what i've done, what has happened, and how it all has been taken is engraved in stone. i have no business trying to make it something different than how i've helped made it.
i know this post must be wrong... cuz that's me. everything i do is wrong.
i know this post must be wrong... cuz that's me. everything i do is wrong.