(no subject)
Steve and I made Daniel go by the decor left over from his son Jericho's birthday party so we could take a token photo of his own birthday.
That was over a week now and as I was scrolling through the images on my phone, I just got hit by a wave of futility somehow. We were just being silly, and he was just humoring us... But seeing this image again, I was overcome with sadness.
When things are not going well, you struggle and fight to make it right. When you don't, it just crumbles and everything falls apart. Shutting up doesn't accomplish anything. Saying 'okay' just to avoid fights fixes nothing. While I can give advice and make suggestions, at the end of the day, nothing is up to me. If they're unwilling to put in the work to make things work, then the end is just a matter of inevitability... I shouldn't feel guilty about this. I actually have gone far and beyond the duties of a friend as it were... But I somehow feel insufficient and very sorry still.
/sigh