Exile From Cool Island
A few weeks ago I was having a super late lunch (call time: 3PM!) with LA Consing Lopez. Things got super relaxed post-meal, we started admitting on what would take away our "cool cards"--the little quirks that would label us terminal (or at least, long-term) dorks if we declared them in public. We're not talking about "I don't like Tom Cruise" levels here. We're hardcore! Naturally, admitting them AGAIN here makes us fearless and/or does nothing to restore our coolness. (Hey LA! Population Dorkdom: One--only me. They won't be able to tell what is where, up or down, left or right!)
"I really can't stand Cameron Diaz!"
"Almost Famous is kinda over-rated. So is Dead Poet's Society."
"I really love Rocky, and it totally deserves its Best Picture Oscar."
"I don't watch movies that have Christian Bale in them. He's a terrible actor."
Then it happened: I revealed what apparently is the TRUMP CARD of un-coolness. Beats all others, hands down.
"I can't stand Johnny Depp! I think he's a smug ass."
Hey, where'd you go?
This from a person who thinks phone-throwing Russell Crowe is a sweetheart! The Deppster has been eternally tainted with me since his days on the TV show 21 Jump Street, where he was a surly whiner despite being the star of the show that shot him into the public consciousness. (And unleashing the icky Richard Grieco upon us because of it. Dear Johnny: Eeew! No thanks, Karen)
Ever since, I've never been able to buy his I'm-cool-because-I'm-so-awesome-I-only-do-alternative-stuff-none-of-that-mainstream-shite persona. Whatever acting skills he possesses can't overcome it. Pirates Of The Carribean only compounded it. Sure it was a Disney movie, but his faux charm was just another form of smugness. Me no likey.
LA's jaw dropped to the ground upon my confession, and he's probably exhausted from dragging it off the floor since he hasn't raised it back up since. No way--you can't NOT like Johnny Depp., he said. (Subtext: You can't NOT like Johnny Depp. It's like, not liking Christmas!) Alas, I don't care about Johnny Depp the way some people don't care about some vegetable, or chopped liver. It's just not for me.
Consider this a refreshing sorbet after all that heavy Depp-ness. Seen here is Alessandro Nivola with Frances McDormand. Because I HAVE seen a few select Christian Bale movies, like Laurel Canyon. But only because Alessandro and Frances were in it. Especially because of Alessandro. Yummmm.
A Word Of Thanks...
... goes to mrshobbes (go check her blog! She's in my Friends page) for being my very own Thom Filicia/Nate Berkus in renovating my very vanilla blog! This swanky new look--in fact this blog's very existence--is a testament to her blog passion (and how well she twisted my arm! Ha ha! She know's I'm joking!). Thanks so much!
mrshobbes, otherwise known as Alexis Aldeguer, is leaving us at the ol' workplace. To say she will be sorely missed is a severe understatement. The fun won't be the same if you're not there, Lex. You were so patient with my snark! More than that, having Lex on the team was like the Hope Diamond--so valuable. You'll want her on your lifeboat. She had that joy d'viver.
Here's a little surprise for you, Lex!
Awww, Colin Firth and Kenneth Branagh in A Month In The Country, circa 1984. Or 85. Can't remember. So young, these are probably baby pictures! Consider this part, dessert!
"I really can't stand Cameron Diaz!"
"Almost Famous is kinda over-rated. So is Dead Poet's Society."
"I really love Rocky, and it totally deserves its Best Picture Oscar."
"I don't watch movies that have Christian Bale in them. He's a terrible actor."
Then it happened: I revealed what apparently is the TRUMP CARD of un-coolness. Beats all others, hands down.
"I can't stand Johnny Depp! I think he's a smug ass."
Hey, where'd you go?
This from a person who thinks phone-throwing Russell Crowe is a sweetheart! The Deppster has been eternally tainted with me since his days on the TV show 21 Jump Street, where he was a surly whiner despite being the star of the show that shot him into the public consciousness. (And unleashing the icky Richard Grieco upon us because of it. Dear Johnny: Eeew! No thanks, Karen)
Ever since, I've never been able to buy his I'm-cool-because-I'm-so-awesome-I-only-do-alternative-stuff-none-of-that-mainstream-shite persona. Whatever acting skills he possesses can't overcome it. Pirates Of The Carribean only compounded it. Sure it was a Disney movie, but his faux charm was just another form of smugness. Me no likey.
LA's jaw dropped to the ground upon my confession, and he's probably exhausted from dragging it off the floor since he hasn't raised it back up since. No way--you can't NOT like Johnny Depp., he said. (Subtext: You can't NOT like Johnny Depp. It's like, not liking Christmas!) Alas, I don't care about Johnny Depp the way some people don't care about some vegetable, or chopped liver. It's just not for me.
Consider this a refreshing sorbet after all that heavy Depp-ness. Seen here is Alessandro Nivola with Frances McDormand. Because I HAVE seen a few select Christian Bale movies, like Laurel Canyon. But only because Alessandro and Frances were in it. Especially because of Alessandro. Yummmm.
A Word Of Thanks...
... goes to mrshobbes (go check her blog! She's in my Friends page) for being my very own Thom Filicia/Nate Berkus in renovating my very vanilla blog! This swanky new look--in fact this blog's very existence--is a testament to her blog passion (and how well she twisted my arm! Ha ha! She know's I'm joking!). Thanks so much!
mrshobbes, otherwise known as Alexis Aldeguer, is leaving us at the ol' workplace. To say she will be sorely missed is a severe understatement. The fun won't be the same if you're not there, Lex. You were so patient with my snark! More than that, having Lex on the team was like the Hope Diamond--so valuable. You'll want her on your lifeboat. She had that joy d'viver.
Here's a little surprise for you, Lex!
Awww, Colin Firth and Kenneth Branagh in A Month In The Country, circa 1984. Or 85. Can't remember. So young, these are probably baby pictures! Consider this part, dessert!