(no subject)
I want to get drunk tonight. Anyone want to get drunk? Or watch me get drunk? Come on, it might be fun.
It wasn't me he wanted. It was that image. Whatever the hell it is. And when I didn't fit it, he found someone else. It hasn't even been a month! What-and to say what he said..further proof of what I was to him.
It was never supposed to be anything anyway. That night..I was only using him that first night. I didn't feel anything for him. I was just scared of the feelings I was developing for someone else. So I used him. He's the one that wanted more. He's the one that wouldn't give up. He made me feel things for him. He convinced me that there was something worth trying. And I gave up something else. For him. And our entire...relationship..was a struggle. And for what? For me to start to fall in love with...no one worth my time.
I wish I'd never slept with him that night. I want to erase him from my life. All that went on between us..that affected my other relationships...that affected other people...none of it was worth him.
Hah, and to think I've actually struggled with even flirting with other guys and here he is...already...
I'm going out tonight. I can't sit here.
It wasn't me he wanted. It was that image. Whatever the hell it is. And when I didn't fit it, he found someone else. It hasn't even been a month! What-and to say what he said..further proof of what I was to him.
It was never supposed to be anything anyway. That night..I was only using him that first night. I didn't feel anything for him. I was just scared of the feelings I was developing for someone else. So I used him. He's the one that wanted more. He's the one that wouldn't give up. He made me feel things for him. He convinced me that there was something worth trying. And I gave up something else. For him. And our entire...relationship..was a struggle. And for what? For me to start to fall in love with...no one worth my time.
I wish I'd never slept with him that night. I want to erase him from my life. All that went on between us..that affected my other relationships...that affected other people...none of it was worth him.
Hah, and to think I've actually struggled with even flirting with other guys and here he is...already...
I'm going out tonight. I can't sit here.