wha?
gio posting on lj? again? wtf?
lol, no there are reasons for it....sitting down smoking lots of cigs and looking at the mirror at myself has inspired something in me....something i thought once lost. so now im going to embrace it and run with it.... :)
for this a list seems most appropriate.
1. I have led a shitty life....very simple..... ive lived in shitty dumps on nothin more that sheets, on streets cops fear to travel down. I can tell people in lexington where i have lived and if they know lexington they will reply "im, sorry". as if to imply that it was something that made me a worse person. I have also been raped....big fuckin shit....i got over it ive moved on, well at least for the most part :).
2. I had a drug problem....big whoodpy hoo. got over it....move on.
3. Despite it all....46 medals in my high school career (yeah so they were in my senior year big shit). graduated in the top percent...again big whoopdy hooo. Got in the whos whos of high school students....so what, that makes me special how? Oh, and i made the deans list top .5% of students at uk.....again so what?
4. I love alex....nuf said....
5. I love tylor....hes my heterosexual life mate....i believe we share a bond that resists any and everything one could throw at it....even time....dont like it fuck off!
6. I AM GIOVANNI....dont like me....again....FUCK OFF!
so you might ask, "what the fuck does any of this matter?" well ill tell you....it really doest....just my own need to make a statement about myself....we all live in little boxes in life....self contained realities in which we are content...but you know what....tonight i fuckin caught my box on fire....and watched it burn, and i took in the bittersweet stench of destruction, and i fucking bathed in it...i refuse to accept myself and my life until two things happen...( another list?)
1. I have realized my goal of bringing to video games what the printing press brough to reading.(wtf does that mean? think about it for more than 5 minutes and you will die of an brain aneurism. just accept it)
2. I have a real life, not defined by boundries and limitations imposed on me by my own fears and reluctance.
again, "why does this matter?", well truth be told it doesnt matter to you, truthfully. It doesnt matter to anybody but me. And quite frankly im tired of living a life that makes me depressed and makes me loath breathing. So im done. Done with the box. Done with the depression. And done with all the bullshit that makes my life seem more and more like a bad soap opera every day of the week.
this is my deceleration of indepence....I will win this war and my freedom!
lol, no there are reasons for it....sitting down smoking lots of cigs and looking at the mirror at myself has inspired something in me....something i thought once lost. so now im going to embrace it and run with it.... :)
for this a list seems most appropriate.
1. I have led a shitty life....very simple..... ive lived in shitty dumps on nothin more that sheets, on streets cops fear to travel down. I can tell people in lexington where i have lived and if they know lexington they will reply "im, sorry". as if to imply that it was something that made me a worse person. I have also been raped....big fuckin shit....i got over it ive moved on, well at least for the most part :).
2. I had a drug problem....big whoodpy hoo. got over it....move on.
3. Despite it all....46 medals in my high school career (yeah so they were in my senior year big shit). graduated in the top percent...again big whoopdy hooo. Got in the whos whos of high school students....so what, that makes me special how? Oh, and i made the deans list top .5% of students at uk.....again so what?
4. I love alex....nuf said....
5. I love tylor....hes my heterosexual life mate....i believe we share a bond that resists any and everything one could throw at it....even time....dont like it fuck off!
6. I AM GIOVANNI....dont like me....again....FUCK OFF!
so you might ask, "what the fuck does any of this matter?" well ill tell you....it really doest....just my own need to make a statement about myself....we all live in little boxes in life....self contained realities in which we are content...but you know what....tonight i fuckin caught my box on fire....and watched it burn, and i took in the bittersweet stench of destruction, and i fucking bathed in it...i refuse to accept myself and my life until two things happen...( another list?)
1. I have realized my goal of bringing to video games what the printing press brough to reading.(wtf does that mean? think about it for more than 5 minutes and you will die of an brain aneurism. just accept it)
2. I have a real life, not defined by boundries and limitations imposed on me by my own fears and reluctance.
again, "why does this matter?", well truth be told it doesnt matter to you, truthfully. It doesnt matter to anybody but me. And quite frankly im tired of living a life that makes me depressed and makes me loath breathing. So im done. Done with the box. Done with the depression. And done with all the bullshit that makes my life seem more and more like a bad soap opera every day of the week.
this is my deceleration of indepence....I will win this war and my freedom!