The wind was a torrent of darkness among the gusty trees.
This week has been THE worst week. And I don't think it's going to get any better.
First Courtney got her head cleaved off in a car accident. That had me all freaked out... On top of the three huge exams I had to take this week. Dr. Boulant wouldn't let me take my AP exam on the scheduled day... She knew I was incapable of doing so.
So I try to maintain a balance of mourning Courtney and keeping up with school work...
ANd then I leave my dorm keys in the nursing skills lab. I don't realize it until an hour after I did it. The TA said she had put them on a bedside table and figured I had come to get them.
*sigh* So some well meaning person from my class probably is keeping them for me until they see me. Which pisses me off. Can't they just turn it into public safety? Because I've used up two of my three lockouts for this semester. Two more... And I fork over 150 to get my locks changed. I may have to do that anyway if my keys don't get returned in a timely manner. I don't know if I can wait until Thursday. So I lost valuable study and lab time Thursday and had to stay up all night cramming for my Nursing 221 exam. Having a childhood friend die a gruesome death kind of puts a dent in your original schoolwork plans. And so when I finally got finished with that... Well, I tried to study for theatre. It didn't work. And I don't think I did that horribly well on the theater exam... Maybe a B. I don't know. At this point, I don't care.
I just want this to be over. I still have a shitload of homework to do... And a huge nutrition exam to study for that is on Monday.
And I cannot even go to stay at Jeremy's because if I'm wrong and the person with my keys does plan to invade my room, they might just forego stealing any of my crap and take my roommate's computer. I'm not going to bear the responsibility for that. So I have to stay here.
Jeremy is coming. He knows that I am essentially have a nervous breakdown.
So I feel like shit. They put Courtney in the ground tomorrow... And I hate thinking about her being there. I know that's not really her anymore... But still. She's not in the world anymore... God knows where COurtney is. All I know is... I wish she was still here.
And it's driving me crazy...
School is driving me crazy.
I wish... I wish that I knew how to handle all of this better. But I don't know how. And quite frankly, unlike other people, I don't have many people that can really help me.
So I'm going to go insane for awhile... Hopefully calm down... Maybe things will get easier in a few weeks. I hope so.
......When I had a bad week, I could at least take comfort in that things would be better the next week.
They aren't going to be.
Voy a sufrir...
First Courtney got her head cleaved off in a car accident. That had me all freaked out... On top of the three huge exams I had to take this week. Dr. Boulant wouldn't let me take my AP exam on the scheduled day... She knew I was incapable of doing so.
So I try to maintain a balance of mourning Courtney and keeping up with school work...
ANd then I leave my dorm keys in the nursing skills lab. I don't realize it until an hour after I did it. The TA said she had put them on a bedside table and figured I had come to get them.
*sigh* So some well meaning person from my class probably is keeping them for me until they see me. Which pisses me off. Can't they just turn it into public safety? Because I've used up two of my three lockouts for this semester. Two more... And I fork over 150 to get my locks changed. I may have to do that anyway if my keys don't get returned in a timely manner. I don't know if I can wait until Thursday. So I lost valuable study and lab time Thursday and had to stay up all night cramming for my Nursing 221 exam. Having a childhood friend die a gruesome death kind of puts a dent in your original schoolwork plans. And so when I finally got finished with that... Well, I tried to study for theatre. It didn't work. And I don't think I did that horribly well on the theater exam... Maybe a B. I don't know. At this point, I don't care.
I just want this to be over. I still have a shitload of homework to do... And a huge nutrition exam to study for that is on Monday.
And I cannot even go to stay at Jeremy's because if I'm wrong and the person with my keys does plan to invade my room, they might just forego stealing any of my crap and take my roommate's computer. I'm not going to bear the responsibility for that. So I have to stay here.
Jeremy is coming. He knows that I am essentially have a nervous breakdown.
So I feel like shit. They put Courtney in the ground tomorrow... And I hate thinking about her being there. I know that's not really her anymore... But still. She's not in the world anymore... God knows where COurtney is. All I know is... I wish she was still here.
And it's driving me crazy...
School is driving me crazy.
I wish... I wish that I knew how to handle all of this better. But I don't know how. And quite frankly, unlike other people, I don't have many people that can really help me.
So I'm going to go insane for awhile... Hopefully calm down... Maybe things will get easier in a few weeks. I hope so.
......When I had a bad week, I could at least take comfort in that things would be better the next week.
They aren't going to be.
Voy a sufrir...