A New Thought To Ponder...
...so after some unfortunate events this evening involving family...I started thinking about something.
I think that part of the extravagant definition of "Caring About Someone" should be;
you care about the person and want to love them even when they don't care and cant' love themselves.
That is how we feel about family. Even when they aren't on our favorites list, even when they hurt our feelings or something. The reason it hurts so so much is because we care about them so much.
Alright that isnt necessarily the direction I was wanting to take this. lol Though it is relevant....my point was...
That is what I want in a person. A best friend, a boyfriend...whatever.
After what happened tonight I just wanted to call someone to talk to them, to tell them what happened and not even get their advice but just know that they cared enough to listen and not that they were judging me or my family or thinking...anything really.
The two people I would have wanted to call, that would probably have been there for me even at 2:30 in the morning...I hesitated and decided against it because...I just...I dont know I guess I just was/am worried of what they would think or say to me.
And while I was thinking this the train of thought led me also to another road.
Is there anyone in my life who I would call? Or who I would have ever called....?
yeah. one is an ex boyfriend...a best friend....turned ex boyfriend after like 3 years. and the other my best friend since first grade.
But not any recent boyfriends.
SO the point my dear friends is this;
I have been so upset, pining whatever whatever over ex boyfriends and my most recent one didnt even make it to my list of someone who I thought actually really cared about me...Clearly it couldnt have been too serious.
Oh well. I still didn't call anyone. I just wrote a lame livejournal entry instead.
That no one besides my adorable alex reads.
so besides Alex's knowledge of this...I will most likely bottle up tonights events...feel bad about what happened...wonder how I can fix it....realize there is nothing I can do short of being something extravagant that would...have intense repercussions and move on...until it happens again....fabulous. what a problem solver i am.
I think that part of the extravagant definition of "Caring About Someone" should be;
you care about the person and want to love them even when they don't care and cant' love themselves.
That is how we feel about family. Even when they aren't on our favorites list, even when they hurt our feelings or something. The reason it hurts so so much is because we care about them so much.
Alright that isnt necessarily the direction I was wanting to take this. lol Though it is relevant....my point was...
That is what I want in a person. A best friend, a boyfriend...whatever.
After what happened tonight I just wanted to call someone to talk to them, to tell them what happened and not even get their advice but just know that they cared enough to listen and not that they were judging me or my family or thinking...anything really.
The two people I would have wanted to call, that would probably have been there for me even at 2:30 in the morning...I hesitated and decided against it because...I just...I dont know I guess I just was/am worried of what they would think or say to me.
And while I was thinking this the train of thought led me also to another road.
Is there anyone in my life who I would call? Or who I would have ever called....?
yeah. one is an ex boyfriend...a best friend....turned ex boyfriend after like 3 years. and the other my best friend since first grade.
But not any recent boyfriends.
SO the point my dear friends is this;
I have been so upset, pining whatever whatever over ex boyfriends and my most recent one didnt even make it to my list of someone who I thought actually really cared about me...Clearly it couldnt have been too serious.
Oh well. I still didn't call anyone. I just wrote a lame livejournal entry instead.
That no one besides my adorable alex reads.
so besides Alex's knowledge of this...I will most likely bottle up tonights events...feel bad about what happened...wonder how I can fix it....realize there is nothing I can do short of being something extravagant that would...have intense repercussions and move on...until it happens again....fabulous. what a problem solver i am.