Letter to Lord Voldemort, from Acheron Hades
Sir:
In the past few days I have had the pleasure of making the acquaintance of Bartemius Crouch, who, I believe, was loyal to you. I had also made an enemy of one Bonnie Wood, and last night the two of us were torturing her together. I turned away momentarily, leaving Crouch in charge of the situation, and when I turned back a few seconds later found that he was dead. He had been beheaded.
I am still unsure of who had done it. I certainly didn’t. Wood couldn’t have, as she was in too much pain, unarmed, and did not have the use of her arms. There was no one else in my house at the time. At that moment I became aware that I was being searched for and, after safely storing Crouch’s head and body, had to leave.
As you are his lord, if you would like me to return Crouch’s remains to you, please let me know and I will happily do so. I am aware that death is usually a temporary state in this place, and if there is any way for him to return, I for one would certainly be happy to see him back.
Sincerely yours,
Acheron Hades
Typist: Last-ditch effort. Will do him no good whatsoever, but he wrote it, and therefore I posted it.