"...then one day it all dawned on me..."
So, I have this problem: disillusionment with Drama. I've spent the past four years of my life doing Drama, working on every show (except one), and now I'm wondering what the hell I'm doing. Why am I dedicating my time to this? Is it that it used to be fun, and now it isn't? Or was it never fun to begin with, and I'm just an idiot for not realizing it? I think the former is much more likely. When I first started Drama, it was something that I really wanted to dedicate myself to. I saw Drama productions as art, and I was only too thrilled to help create them. I worked as much as I possibly could, and that hardly ever stopped for three years. But now, I'm thinking, "what the fuck?". What's the point of contributing to this? Is it doing anything?
Ironically, as a freshman, I didn't like band that much, especially marching band. The only reason I was in it was pretty much because if I wasn't, I wouldn't ever play the horn. I pretty much just saw it as my only option. Now, I think it's amazing. At pageant, I saw what happens when people actually care. When people fully dedicate themselves to creating something amazing, it's thrilling to be a part of it. Despite the fact that I don't have that many friends in band (in fact a bunch of people don't like me that much), I'm still thrilled to be in it.
Drama, on the other hand, is different. When I was a freshman, I felt very similar to Drama as I do to band now. A bunch of people were dedicating themselves to create something, and I was part of it. I wanted nothing more than to become a thespian. Now, drama just kind of feels like something that I have to do. Worse, it seems like almost everyone in the department feels that way. It seems like very few people are actually dedicating themselves to it. I have a theory as to why that is, as illustrated below.
1. The shows this year. First of all, it seems like almost every show this year is just appeasement to someone who used to go to the school. At least half the shows this year are being directed by former students, who probably wouldn't be allowed to direct anywhere else. I like the idea of student direction, but former student direction is different. If a student directs a show, it's part of the educational process. If a former student with no credentials comes back and directs a show, it's just kind of nostalgia. Not only have former student productions squelched opportunity for outside directors, they've also, I believe, squelched opportunity for student direction. There are only two mainstage productions being directed by students this year (as opposed to five my sophomore year), and both of the directors are so qualified that to turn down either one would have been an insult to the process.
Second of all, the shows seem to mean relatively little plotwise. I mean, a show is supposed to be fiction and everything, but it seems like none of the mainstage shows (that doesn't include Alice's Wonderland) have any kind of moral message. I'm pretty sure that every other year, we've had at least one or two plays that actually mean something.
2. The lack of shows this year. There are only eight or so. I know that the 13 we did in my sophomore year was too many, but we can definitely manage more than eight. Eight shows makes it hard for almost anyone to get hours, unless they're a master or an actor. Even some of the masters aren't getting that many. We need to do more shows.
3. The lack of freshman involvement. My freshman year, NONE of the shows were cast over the summer. And every single show had at least one freshman in it, except for the thespian show. This year, over a third of our season was cast over the summer. That's just ridiculous. Not to mention that with the lack of shows combined with the new heftier requirements, I think we're going to have a painfully small number of new thespians.
And that's why I feel disillusioned with Drama. An exception seems to be Alice's Wonderland, which, while not being a mainstage show, seems to have a bunch of people involved who actually care. I apologize to everyone in it for not being able to attend as many rehearsals as I've missed.
Ironically, as a freshman, I didn't like band that much, especially marching band. The only reason I was in it was pretty much because if I wasn't, I wouldn't ever play the horn. I pretty much just saw it as my only option. Now, I think it's amazing. At pageant, I saw what happens when people actually care. When people fully dedicate themselves to creating something amazing, it's thrilling to be a part of it. Despite the fact that I don't have that many friends in band (in fact a bunch of people don't like me that much), I'm still thrilled to be in it.
Drama, on the other hand, is different. When I was a freshman, I felt very similar to Drama as I do to band now. A bunch of people were dedicating themselves to create something, and I was part of it. I wanted nothing more than to become a thespian. Now, drama just kind of feels like something that I have to do. Worse, it seems like almost everyone in the department feels that way. It seems like very few people are actually dedicating themselves to it. I have a theory as to why that is, as illustrated below.
1. The shows this year. First of all, it seems like almost every show this year is just appeasement to someone who used to go to the school. At least half the shows this year are being directed by former students, who probably wouldn't be allowed to direct anywhere else. I like the idea of student direction, but former student direction is different. If a student directs a show, it's part of the educational process. If a former student with no credentials comes back and directs a show, it's just kind of nostalgia. Not only have former student productions squelched opportunity for outside directors, they've also, I believe, squelched opportunity for student direction. There are only two mainstage productions being directed by students this year (as opposed to five my sophomore year), and both of the directors are so qualified that to turn down either one would have been an insult to the process.
Second of all, the shows seem to mean relatively little plotwise. I mean, a show is supposed to be fiction and everything, but it seems like none of the mainstage shows (that doesn't include Alice's Wonderland) have any kind of moral message. I'm pretty sure that every other year, we've had at least one or two plays that actually mean something.
2. The lack of shows this year. There are only eight or so. I know that the 13 we did in my sophomore year was too many, but we can definitely manage more than eight. Eight shows makes it hard for almost anyone to get hours, unless they're a master or an actor. Even some of the masters aren't getting that many. We need to do more shows.
3. The lack of freshman involvement. My freshman year, NONE of the shows were cast over the summer. And every single show had at least one freshman in it, except for the thespian show. This year, over a third of our season was cast over the summer. That's just ridiculous. Not to mention that with the lack of shows combined with the new heftier requirements, I think we're going to have a painfully small number of new thespians.
And that's why I feel disillusioned with Drama. An exception seems to be Alice's Wonderland, which, while not being a mainstage show, seems to have a bunch of people involved who actually care. I apologize to everyone in it for not being able to attend as many rehearsals as I've missed.