Steve Rogers' Letter to James "Bucky" Barnes
Dear Bucky,
Captcha wants you to do Tony.
If you know what I mean.
wink wink.
Just thought I'd pass on the message.
Love,
Your Best Friend Forever.
Steve.
P.S. What I meant was that captcha wants you to have all the sex with Tony.
P.P.S. Just in case it wasn't obvious.
P.P.P.S. Clint says it was obvious and I don't need to explain. Natasha says you're pathetic. Rhodey says if you hurt his best friend he's gonna repulsor your face, but he gives you his blessing otherwise because you both have the same first name. Also, he said something insane about always liking you best out of all the Howling Commandos he studied at the Academy but that's obviously just crazy talk.
P.P.P.P.S. I figured I should explain just in case since you still haven't "HOOKED UP" with Tony. Thor wants to know how you use the hook when you have all the sex. But I don't know either, I told him to ask Darcy. Ms. Potts just walked by and read this letter. She laughed a lot and then asked JARVIS something about coffee dates? Even in the future dames women don't make any sense. Ms. Potts is pretty swell though. Smart and powerful and confident and beautiful and and and...anyway, JARVIS says Tony lives off of coffee and engineering stuff in his workshop. Stuff like your arm. I dunno why he wanted me to tell you that.
P.P.P.P.P.S. You used to be a lot better at dating. What happened? Sorry, that was rude. It's okay. Ask Coulson for future dating tips. He told me, he would help me with anything, so this probably counts. Don't ask Fury. He yells. A LOT.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Don't worry. Tony TOTALLY wants you. He told Bruce when they were doing science with Jane and Selvig. Don't worry that's not a s-e-x thing, Thor checked. Hulk told me Tony like-likes you last mission. It happened while Tony was passed out. You missed it because you were hiding in that vent after Loki blasted you with truth spell for the tenth time in a row.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. You should go for it. It's pretty sad when supervillains are trying to help you "HOOK UP" with Tony.
Captcha wants you to do Tony.
If you know what I mean.
wink wink.
Just thought I'd pass on the message.
Love,
Your Best Friend Forever.
Steve.
P.S. What I meant was that captcha wants you to have all the sex with Tony.
P.P.S. Just in case it wasn't obvious.
P.P.P.S. Clint says it was obvious and I don't need to explain. Natasha says you're pathetic. Rhodey says if you hurt his best friend he's gonna repulsor your face, but he gives you his blessing otherwise because you both have the same first name. Also, he said something insane about always liking you best out of all the Howling Commandos he studied at the Academy but that's obviously just crazy talk.
P.P.P.P.S. I figured I should explain just in case since you still haven't "HOOKED UP" with Tony. Thor wants to know how you use the hook when you have all the sex. But I don't know either, I told him to ask Darcy. Ms. Potts just walked by and read this letter. She laughed a lot and then asked JARVIS something about coffee dates? Even in the future dames women don't make any sense. Ms. Potts is pretty swell though. Smart and powerful and confident and beautiful and and and...anyway, JARVIS says Tony lives off of coffee and engineering stuff in his workshop. Stuff like your arm. I dunno why he wanted me to tell you that.
P.P.P.P.P.S. You used to be a lot better at dating. What happened? Sorry, that was rude. It's okay. Ask Coulson for future dating tips. He told me, he would help me with anything, so this probably counts. Don't ask Fury. He yells. A LOT.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Don't worry. Tony TOTALLY wants you. He told Bruce when they were doing science with Jane and Selvig. Don't worry that's not a s-e-x thing, Thor checked. Hulk told me Tony like-likes you last mission. It happened while Tony was passed out. You missed it because you were hiding in that vent after Loki blasted you with truth spell for the tenth time in a row.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. You should go for it. It's pretty sad when supervillains are trying to help you "HOOK UP" with Tony.