Clarity
For the first time in over a year I know what I want.... and it's not you.
Who you choose to spend your time with is a reflection of who you are. Either good or bad.
Everything you are
Everything you do
Every cheesy line you say
Every charming smile you flash my way
Fails to ring true
You throw your words around
Too carelessly
It loses it's novelty when you've said it to twenty other girls before
I'm not impressed with the charming, smooth, sleek, and troubled guys anymore. That phase of my life. Is. Over.
I will not be a sucker for a well rehearsed line.
I will not be a sucker for a polished kiss.
I will not be tricked into the troubled soul scenario.
I can see the charming mask... but I don't like whats behind it.
Everyone puts their best foot forward to impress the people around them. But sometimes there other foot is so far back that the charm is misleading.
I've finally pin-pointed you.
You are smart. Very smart. You know how to charm the people around you and to get what you want. You go for the innocent, because the experienced know what you for what you really are: not worth a second glance.
Everyone knows these type of people, whether they're aware of it or not.
Those people that just have a negative energy. When your with them you can't help but have fun and you almost forget about that nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach that is telling you something is wrong. You continue to spend your time with them thinking that they are great and it must just be you thats the problem. But then... you slowly start to realize, the person sitting next to you, that you've grown to believe is the type of person you enjoy spending your time with... is judging you. In the worst way. Judging, and watching for a weakness to bring you down with. And then you wonder, why would this smiling charming person want to bring me down? The answer.... well the answer is because there is a fundamental problem with their personality. A trait that cannot be suppressed and will always be there no matter how many fake smiles and polished masks they put on to impress you -- meanness. It's in all of us, but there are those all too numerous people that it is a stability for. They feed off of it. They live for it. They cannot help themselves. They are just plain bad people. They are angry. They have problems of their own... big problems. And they don't have the skill to handle it in a productive way. These type of people all have a goodness in them. And it's the naive that think the good will win. It won't. Because the overwhelming need to hate is crippling to the good. It smothers it until it is almost impossible to find.
It is the just plain dumb people that think this is a label that is not true. No. It is true. These people, yes, have their own individuality, but they are all so predictable in their own way. Do yourself a favor and shut up. People do fit into categories. People are predictable. People repeat history. There is an undeniable pattern that the knowledgeable recognize. People think they are so unique and there is no body that can even begin to know them or recognize their behavior. Well, reality check. You are predictable. You are not the first to have those feelings, or those thoughts. It is incredibly big headed and ignorant to think that out of the billions of people on this earth, not one is as special or as smart or as unique as you. You are convinced that you are special, made for something bigger and better. Well, guess what: The person sitting next to you has the same belief. We all do. People are animals. And no person has ever questioned the fact that animals are predictable. They hibernate. They go south for the winter. They will eat like clockwork. They react bad to a predator. They will stay close to their kind or they will roam free and unbridled. People are animals and don't mislead yourself by thinking otherwise. And if you don't know what you are talking about, please just sit quietly. Because nobody is impressed by ignorance. Least of all, me.
I know what I want:
I value a guy that is real.
Unpolished.
What you see is what you get.
Goofy.
No big fancy words to impress.
Does not care what others think.
Is not interested in impressing others, especially me.
Comfortable with his appearance and his personality.
Does not have to put a mask on to hide what he really is.
Is true to himself, always.
Humor is a big part of what he is.
Respects everyone that deserves it.
Does not need to stereotype or put down other people in an effort to make himself look better than them.
Has big plans.
Follows through.
I don't need a talker, I need a doer.
Reliable.
Fundamentaly good.
Perseptive.
Is not fooled by appearances or fake smiles.
Unshallow.
Ultimatly a dork, and happy with it.
Respects and treasures people who deserve it.
Is not afraid to openly admire.
I W I L L S E T T L E F O R N O T H I N G L E S S