there is no spoon
# Ah, my last day of vacation. Despite not traveling anywhere (I've had that itch for a while now) it's been one of the best in memory. Have felt really clearheaded and thought a lot about my life and lifestyle and more or less came to the conclusion that I'm out of the habit of organizing my time and following up on many types of responsibilities, but also that those are behavioral and cognitive issues, which means I can train myself to behave and think differently. It's kind of like how you are able to automatically drive home from work using the same route every day without really thinking about it, but if you wanted to, you could take a different route, and if you took it often enough, that would become your default instead. By being more mindful, I can change my habits.
I've sort of known this for a long time, but it's only recently that I've really wanted on a sincere, gut level to make the change. So far I've started having breakfast at home instead of grabbing something around lunchtime, made a point of going out somewhere almost every day instead of staying in the whole day, gone to the gym a number of times, finally fixed up my apartment, and crossed off a lot of to-do list items that have been hanging around for a while. The main thing I'm focusing on is identifying when I'm procrastinating (it has its own sort of stress that I'm coming to consciously recognize) and just do the thing right then. Like yesterday, I thought about paying my bills, decided to put it off, realized I felt stressed about having them hanging over me, and just went ahead and did it. Instant relief! Now I can stress about other things! :DDD
# In other news, Broadchurch is back and just, like, MAGICAL. OMG, Alec and Ellie, never change.
# Also, Agent Carter. I am really down with this show. Also, I need to write Peggy/Angie fic.
# Have been podficcing a very long fic for an auction and hope to be finishing it soon... though I suspect I'm going to be unhappy with my first take and rerecord the whole thing.
I've sort of known this for a long time, but it's only recently that I've really wanted on a sincere, gut level to make the change. So far I've started having breakfast at home instead of grabbing something around lunchtime, made a point of going out somewhere almost every day instead of staying in the whole day, gone to the gym a number of times, finally fixed up my apartment, and crossed off a lot of to-do list items that have been hanging around for a while. The main thing I'm focusing on is identifying when I'm procrastinating (it has its own sort of stress that I'm coming to consciously recognize) and just do the thing right then. Like yesterday, I thought about paying my bills, decided to put it off, realized I felt stressed about having them hanging over me, and just went ahead and did it. Instant relief! Now I can stress about other things! :DDD
# In other news, Broadchurch is back and just, like, MAGICAL. OMG, Alec and Ellie, never change.
# Also, Agent Carter. I am really down with this show. Also, I need to write Peggy/Angie fic.
# Have been podficcing a very long fic for an auction and hope to be finishing it soon... though I suspect I'm going to be unhappy with my first take and rerecord the whole thing.