Dude, this turned into actual meta
Been reading a bit of h/c fic lately and I love it so. But I've noticed some tendencies that kind of make me lose interest in a story unless it's otherwise good enough to make me very invested in finishing it. I mention them here not to bash, because one fangirl's turn-off are likely another's kinks, but just to see what everyone else thinks.
First, name-calling and blame. For example, Steve has broken his elbow in the line of duty and Danny, to cover his fear and concern, does nothing but yell at him for it as he patches him up. The "Look what you went and did to yourself" thing kind of irks me because, I think, it transfers responsibility for the injury from the villain of the story onto one of the heroes, which I think dilutes the dramatic tension by diminishing the fearsomeness of the villain and/or the danger of their situation.
The blame thing also gets to me because (if Danny really means it) those words indicate that Danny thinks Steve really hurts himself on purpose, which I don't think is in character for either of them. Steve goes willingly headlong into danger and Danny rolls his eyes and kvetches a lot (my family, comprised of East Coast Jews, does the same thing, except for when we really want to make a serious point and have the other person pay good attention), but goes right with him when he can. In other words, the way I read the show, Steve doesn't have a death wish, or even a masochistic impulse. There's suicidal ideation, then there's a lifestyle and vocation that are active, athletic, adventurous, and really hazardous.
Now, if a story was about Steve (or Danny, or whoever) having a suicidal/masochistic/martyr streak, then Danny yelling at him for getting hurt would make more sense to me because it would have something to do with the plot; it would show Danny connecting to Steve on a deeper level, recognizing the darkness at work in his heart or whatever, and it would underscore a conflict that needs to be resolved.
I think excessive blaming of the hurt guy or girl is also annoying because, well, the person is lying there in agony. Sure, a little shared dark humor, some ironic comments, some heat-of-the-moment words said in anger or out of fear. I love that. I don't expect Danny to get melodramatically tender and doe-eyed whenever he's worried about Steve. I like my guys stoic, and their tough love is more or less in character. It's just when Danny won't shut up about what an idiot Steve is for getting shot... It can be done right in good fic, but usually it's repetitive and distracting and creates a barrier between me and any sympathy I can feel for the guy lying there shot. I wanna focus on the direness of their situation and the hurt guy's injury/sickness, and I want the comforting guy to show how he feels instead of ranting the entire time. A whisper, not a scream.
The second thing I thought I'd mention is lack of setting. A story might begin in media res, which is great because the guys are in the middle of a shoot-out or at the hospital or waking up together and about to make out! All to the great. But where are they? The reader is often left to imagine for herself, to pull the background together from a mishmash of fics from the same fandom or genre. The shoot-out must be outside an abandoned factory, or if there are enough details to help, it could be in the middle of a street. The hospital usually means a waiting room, the ICU, the hurt guy's room, or a random hall. I'd kind of like to know which it is, and what it looks like, and other descriptive details. (And can't somebody wait for news in the hospital cafeteria for once?) And it's jarring when Steve and Danny wake up together and make out and you assume they're in Steve's bedroom only to later discover they're actually somewhere quite different.
Raymond Chandler once said that readers only think they want to get right to the action, that description will slow things down and make them lose interest. In fact, though, he rightly says, artful description is what makes or breaks a story, what makes it come alive and the action feel realistic and the emotional plane touch us as deeply as it can.
So I guess what I'm saying is that even in a brief ficlet, it's usually a good idea to say where the heck they are.
And that goes for exposition as well. Look! There's a shootout against random thugs and a villain with a non-Anglo name (in some location not disclosed to the reader)! A brief sentence mentions that the villain is a serial killer/arsonist/drug kingpin the team has been after for days, and that's about it before we move straight to the part where Steve gets winged or Danny taken hostage. The villain is disposable, which is more or less fine in many stories. The h/c drama is going to focus, amazingly, on the h/c. For those of us who ache for Danny to wake up in a hospital bed to find Steve sleeping with his head on the mattress and a firm grip around Danny's hand, the psychological profile of the bad guy may not always matter and can frequently get in the way. No need to turn a 1k-word idea into a novella.
That said, poorly sketched exposition can feel random and leave the reader uninvested in what happens. A paragraph or three somewhere relating the circumstances that brought about the current scene can do wonders for a reader. Or if not that, then some other clever writerly thing that works well with the story, however it's done, because there is no one right way to tell a story.
Sometimes, too, I feel like a scene in the middle of a story could actually use some prior scenes building up to it. That's especially so in stories where the action shifts abruptly from section to section. For instance, Danny realizes he's in love with Steve [yay!]--cut to an unspecified length of time later, when Danny is driving a battered Steve home from the hospital. Why is Steve battered? What happened? How long has it been since Danny had his epiphany and has it changed his life in any way? I'd really have a wonderful time reading all that, no need in a longer story to get straight to the good parts.
So, um, show don't tell?
Last, I've been thinking about why some h/c fic touches me deeply while other h/c fic leaves me almost completely unaffected. There are a lot of obvious reasons, but one that keeps coming back to me is the generic nature of the narrative. At its core, the h/c form usually goes like this: A is hurt --> B has intense feelings about this --> B comforts A --> some resolution that affirms their relationship. I like that form; it DOES things for me. But it takes more than the form to make me *feel* for A and B. A and B have to feel and act like this stuff doesn't happen to them once a day and twice on Sundays.
In other words, if A and B are in a dangerous situation, let them feel and act like it. If A has been kidnapped and held hostage, then he should be frightened, even if he doesn't show it. His internal narrative should reflect uncertainty, not boredom. Tension, not casualness. If he's thinking, "Just another crazy kidnapper, must be Wednesday already, where does the time go and B better get here soon because these ropes are a little uncomfortable and I'm tired of the kidnapper's insane ramblings" -- then I'm not gonna be all that worried for him, or sympathetic for B's worry.
So I think the writer's challenge is to remember that the characters don't think of their lives in generic terms. Getting kidnapped or shot at is a big deal, even if it does happen kind of often. It makes an impression on you, and the results from the character's point of view are always in doubt. The reader can guess that there's a hospital scene followed by first-time sex, but the characters only know that their lives are in danger and there's no happy ending guaranteed. A good story puts me so far into their pov that I worry along with them.
Okay, enough of that. As I said above, the stuff I criticize probably works really well for other people, and power to them/you! I hope this doesn't harsh anyone's squee, but I wanted to get these thoughts out. And of course there are exceptions, stories that break all my "rules" and yet keep me enraptured, so, there you go. Thoughts? What are your h/c nitpicks?
Oh, and btw: WHERE is all the KONO fic????
First, name-calling and blame. For example, Steve has broken his elbow in the line of duty and Danny, to cover his fear and concern, does nothing but yell at him for it as he patches him up. The "Look what you went and did to yourself" thing kind of irks me because, I think, it transfers responsibility for the injury from the villain of the story onto one of the heroes, which I think dilutes the dramatic tension by diminishing the fearsomeness of the villain and/or the danger of their situation.
The blame thing also gets to me because (if Danny really means it) those words indicate that Danny thinks Steve really hurts himself on purpose, which I don't think is in character for either of them. Steve goes willingly headlong into danger and Danny rolls his eyes and kvetches a lot (my family, comprised of East Coast Jews, does the same thing, except for when we really want to make a serious point and have the other person pay good attention), but goes right with him when he can. In other words, the way I read the show, Steve doesn't have a death wish, or even a masochistic impulse. There's suicidal ideation, then there's a lifestyle and vocation that are active, athletic, adventurous, and really hazardous.
Now, if a story was about Steve (or Danny, or whoever) having a suicidal/masochistic/martyr streak, then Danny yelling at him for getting hurt would make more sense to me because it would have something to do with the plot; it would show Danny connecting to Steve on a deeper level, recognizing the darkness at work in his heart or whatever, and it would underscore a conflict that needs to be resolved.
I think excessive blaming of the hurt guy or girl is also annoying because, well, the person is lying there in agony. Sure, a little shared dark humor, some ironic comments, some heat-of-the-moment words said in anger or out of fear. I love that. I don't expect Danny to get melodramatically tender and doe-eyed whenever he's worried about Steve. I like my guys stoic, and their tough love is more or less in character. It's just when Danny won't shut up about what an idiot Steve is for getting shot... It can be done right in good fic, but usually it's repetitive and distracting and creates a barrier between me and any sympathy I can feel for the guy lying there shot. I wanna focus on the direness of their situation and the hurt guy's injury/sickness, and I want the comforting guy to show how he feels instead of ranting the entire time. A whisper, not a scream.
The second thing I thought I'd mention is lack of setting. A story might begin in media res, which is great because the guys are in the middle of a shoot-out or at the hospital or waking up together and about to make out! All to the great. But where are they? The reader is often left to imagine for herself, to pull the background together from a mishmash of fics from the same fandom or genre. The shoot-out must be outside an abandoned factory, or if there are enough details to help, it could be in the middle of a street. The hospital usually means a waiting room, the ICU, the hurt guy's room, or a random hall. I'd kind of like to know which it is, and what it looks like, and other descriptive details. (And can't somebody wait for news in the hospital cafeteria for once?) And it's jarring when Steve and Danny wake up together and make out and you assume they're in Steve's bedroom only to later discover they're actually somewhere quite different.
Raymond Chandler once said that readers only think they want to get right to the action, that description will slow things down and make them lose interest. In fact, though, he rightly says, artful description is what makes or breaks a story, what makes it come alive and the action feel realistic and the emotional plane touch us as deeply as it can.
So I guess what I'm saying is that even in a brief ficlet, it's usually a good idea to say where the heck they are.
And that goes for exposition as well. Look! There's a shootout against random thugs and a villain with a non-Anglo name (in some location not disclosed to the reader)! A brief sentence mentions that the villain is a serial killer/arsonist/drug kingpin the team has been after for days, and that's about it before we move straight to the part where Steve gets winged or Danny taken hostage. The villain is disposable, which is more or less fine in many stories. The h/c drama is going to focus, amazingly, on the h/c. For those of us who ache for Danny to wake up in a hospital bed to find Steve sleeping with his head on the mattress and a firm grip around Danny's hand, the psychological profile of the bad guy may not always matter and can frequently get in the way. No need to turn a 1k-word idea into a novella.
That said, poorly sketched exposition can feel random and leave the reader uninvested in what happens. A paragraph or three somewhere relating the circumstances that brought about the current scene can do wonders for a reader. Or if not that, then some other clever writerly thing that works well with the story, however it's done, because there is no one right way to tell a story.
Sometimes, too, I feel like a scene in the middle of a story could actually use some prior scenes building up to it. That's especially so in stories where the action shifts abruptly from section to section. For instance, Danny realizes he's in love with Steve [yay!]--cut to an unspecified length of time later, when Danny is driving a battered Steve home from the hospital. Why is Steve battered? What happened? How long has it been since Danny had his epiphany and has it changed his life in any way? I'd really have a wonderful time reading all that, no need in a longer story to get straight to the good parts.
So, um, show don't tell?
Last, I've been thinking about why some h/c fic touches me deeply while other h/c fic leaves me almost completely unaffected. There are a lot of obvious reasons, but one that keeps coming back to me is the generic nature of the narrative. At its core, the h/c form usually goes like this: A is hurt --> B has intense feelings about this --> B comforts A --> some resolution that affirms their relationship. I like that form; it DOES things for me. But it takes more than the form to make me *feel* for A and B. A and B have to feel and act like this stuff doesn't happen to them once a day and twice on Sundays.
In other words, if A and B are in a dangerous situation, let them feel and act like it. If A has been kidnapped and held hostage, then he should be frightened, even if he doesn't show it. His internal narrative should reflect uncertainty, not boredom. Tension, not casualness. If he's thinking, "Just another crazy kidnapper, must be Wednesday already, where does the time go and B better get here soon because these ropes are a little uncomfortable and I'm tired of the kidnapper's insane ramblings" -- then I'm not gonna be all that worried for him, or sympathetic for B's worry.
So I think the writer's challenge is to remember that the characters don't think of their lives in generic terms. Getting kidnapped or shot at is a big deal, even if it does happen kind of often. It makes an impression on you, and the results from the character's point of view are always in doubt. The reader can guess that there's a hospital scene followed by first-time sex, but the characters only know that their lives are in danger and there's no happy ending guaranteed. A good story puts me so far into their pov that I worry along with them.
Okay, enough of that. As I said above, the stuff I criticize probably works really well for other people, and power to them/you! I hope this doesn't harsh anyone's squee, but I wanted to get these thoughts out. And of course there are exceptions, stories that break all my "rules" and yet keep me enraptured, so, there you go. Thoughts? What are your h/c nitpicks?
Oh, and btw: WHERE is all the KONO fic????