(no subject)

[desertofthemind]

While going through my old clothes and tossing out stuff, I came across a shirt I made my senior year of high school for something called 'Patriot Day.' The basic idea was that you dress in red white or blue, or if you're daring, all three, to show your support for America. My friend Sara and I decided, in our typical fashion, to write a bunch of little somewhat anti-patriotic, satirical haikus and put them on a white shirt. After all, there were no rules against wearing haikus. Forgetting about the shirt up until now, I haven't seen it pretty much since when I wore it for that. Most of the haikus are pretty funny, so I'd like to post them.
*Ahem*

An Evening of Patriotic Haikus
with Daniel Gilmore

Red, White, and Blue flag
We cannot drop it... or else
America wow!

Loyal Patriots
Fought for freedom for our kids
Now push up daisys

We don't like monarchs
So we fought the British hard
Throw tea in the ocean

Can't mess with this land
Using ulmats make us cool
Ünïtëd Stätës Rülës!

Now Europe loves us
Because we beat the nazis
Go United States

Poor wandering Jews
Holy land belongs to you
Palestine is wrong

Americans help
Give poor people from Chad food
Feed the world with Coke

We make the best stuff
American cars are great
Who wants a Porsche?

Europe don't bother
Leave Latin America
Because we want it

Eienstein made us nukes
Fall out does not taste so good
Our deserts glow weird

We warned you Japan
We had to do something quick
We will help you now

Make a switch to red
We will not recognize you
There is no China