[Private Post] The Nature of Love
Kev is working on a paper about the research of a psychologist called Harry Harlowe. We've spoken about it briefly and he's promised to let me read the assignment when he's finished.
I'm concerned about him. He insists that he is okay with this, but the little he's told me about this man's experiments have left me uneasy and angry as hell.
I decided, today, to do some research for myself.
I almost wish I hadn't. I'm not sure exactly what I'm feeling. I know I'm angry that someone could treat any living thing like this in the name of science. I feel cold and shaky too, knowing that the Hunters who had Trowa and I, from the comments they passed, viewed us the same way in which Harlowe viewed these monkeys, that they were planning to experiment on us in much the same way.
But, what really gets me angry is thinking about how this relates to Kev's mother. She was a wire monkey, to put it bluntly. In reading about the responses of the baby monkeys; the way they rocked when upset. I know Kev does this. I've seen him do that, and felt helpless watching him.
In writing this paper, he has to compare his own life experiences to these experiments. I shudder to think what memories this is making him relive, and I'm worried about him and scared for him. I know he needs to be aware of his own issues to be a good therapist but that fact doesn't make this any easier.
God, when I think of everything his mother put him through and continues to put him through, I still fight the urge to go give her a piece of my mind. But, I can't. I promised Kev and I promised Trowa, but I can't keep watching him getting hurt by this over and over.
I'm concerned about him. He insists that he is okay with this, but the little he's told me about this man's experiments have left me uneasy and angry as hell.
I decided, today, to do some research for myself.
I almost wish I hadn't. I'm not sure exactly what I'm feeling. I know I'm angry that someone could treat any living thing like this in the name of science. I feel cold and shaky too, knowing that the Hunters who had Trowa and I, from the comments they passed, viewed us the same way in which Harlowe viewed these monkeys, that they were planning to experiment on us in much the same way.
But, what really gets me angry is thinking about how this relates to Kev's mother. She was a wire monkey, to put it bluntly. In reading about the responses of the baby monkeys; the way they rocked when upset. I know Kev does this. I've seen him do that, and felt helpless watching him.
In writing this paper, he has to compare his own life experiences to these experiments. I shudder to think what memories this is making him relive, and I'm worried about him and scared for him. I know he needs to be aware of his own issues to be a good therapist but that fact doesn't make this any easier.
God, when I think of everything his mother put him through and continues to put him through, I still fight the urge to go give her a piece of my mind. But, I can't. I promised Kev and I promised Trowa, but I can't keep watching him getting hurt by this over and over.