[Behind the Curtain] Quatre, Trowa and Kevin - 24 February 2000
This takes place after this post:
http://psych-boi-82.livejournal.com/26116.html
Quatre:
*takes a sip of tea* *tries to focus on the textbook I'm reading but fails* *rubs my temples and sighs*
Trowa:
*takes out my keys and unlocks the door* *opens it slowly and walks inside* *closes the door and walks up to you* *puts my hand on your temples and rubs circles slowly* Long day?
Quatre:
*looks up at you* *Smiles* Something like that, yes.
Trowa:
*sits down beside you* Take a break. *gestures to the books* I'm sure this can wait a while.
Quatre:
*Sighs* Everything else does so I suppose this is no different. Would you like some tea? I've just finished this. Kev made it before he went to the library.
Trowa:
No, Cat. I'm fine. *leans back on the wall and kicks shoes off*
Quatre:
*watches you* *moves over on the couch* *Pats the space next to me* There's room here if you'd prefer.
Trowa:
*smiles* *crawls onto the couch, leaving the shoes on the floor* *leans closer to you and closes my eyes for a moment, resting them.*
Quatre:
You're tired. *leans over and kisses your forehead* You're working very long hours. *softly* I don't remember the last time we sat like this.
Trowa:
*puts an arm around you, eyes still closed* We can enjoy the time now.
Quatre:
Yes we can. *Sighs* I miss you, Trowa. Our schedules don't seem to be meshing very well at all lately.
Trowa:
I know. *opens my eyes and blinks a couple of times* I don't think my hours will get better anytime soon.
Quatre:
Oh. *turns my head away slightly and stares at the wall* I'm not sure mine are either. I had hoped....*shakes my head* Never mind.
Trowa:
*looks at you* What?
Quatre:
I've been feeling a bit.....*shakes my head* It's foolish. *Shrugs* I'm not even sure it's me.
Trowa:
*frowns* What is is, Quatre?
Quatre:
*slowly* I'm not sure. I'm feeling things. Emotions. I thought they were mine, but I'm not sure. *sigh* They're getting worse and I'm not dealing with them very well.
Trowa:
*shifts eyes* What emotions?
Quatre:
*bites down on my lip* [Agitation, frustration. ] *looks at you* [ I've been feeling very unsure of things....about.....] *trails off*
Trowa:
*runs a hand through my hair* unsure?
Quatre:
*nods* That's the one that's upsetting me the most. *whisper* I thought it was to do with us, because we're not seeing much of each other anymore. I can't....*stops*
Trowa:
*whispers* It's not about us.
Quatre:
*doesn't hide my relief* I didn't want it to be. I want to think we're okay. *studies your face* We are okay, aren't we? I feel like I never see you anymore....*frowns* Do you know what this is about?
Trowa:
*kisses you* We are okay. *licks my lips* It's work.
Quatre:
*kisses you back slowly, savouring your taste* *breaks the kiss* Work? Are these your feelings, Trowa?
Trowa:
*nods* I didn't know they were affecting you. Im sorry.
Quatre:
*feels guilty* No, it's okay. I should have talked to you earlier, insisted we talked instead of worrying about it. About us. *squeezes your hand* If it's affecting you that badly why don't you leave?
Trowa:
*shrugs* I'm just bored. It's not that bad.
Quatre:
*voice slightly sharp* I'm not just picking up on boredom, Trowa. And I'm not that much of an idiot. Talk to me. Please.
Trowa:
You are very rarely an idiot. *shakes head* I don't know what else to do.
Quatre:
It's affecting you, love. I can feel it. *reaches out and strokes your face* You can't stay at a job you hate. *softly* I know what that can do to you. I can feel what it's doing to you. There has to be options. There always are - it's just a case of finding them.
Trowa:
*smiles slightly* You are getting worked up over something unimportant. There are worse things than a boring job.
Quatre:
*voice raises slightly* I am not getting worked up. If this is so damn unimportant why have I been getting all this crap from you? Tell me that.
Trowa:
*grumbles* because I was careless.
Quatre:
*raises an eyebrow* So it's /careless/ to let someone who loves you know how you're feeling. *glares at you* I thought we could be honest with each other. Obviously I was wrong
Trowa:
*sighs* Quatre, this is a stupid job I'm not happy with. I can certainly deal with it. I used to deal with bigger things.
Quatre:
*looks stubborn* This is not just a stupid job, Trowa. I have not spent the last month or so wondering if there was something seriously wrong with our relationship because of nothing.
Trowa:
Do you think there's something wrong?
Quatre:
You tell me. *counts off on my fingers* Let's see. You're /bored/ at work and didn't tell me, so we have communication problems. I only worked out there is something wrong because you got /careless/. Should I continue?
Trowa:
What do you want me to tell you, Quatre? It's a job, a fucking job, it isn't supposed to be fun.
Quatre:
I know that. But it's not supposed to do this to you either. It was supposed to be a temporary thing. You were supposed to be going home. *looks down* You were helping the general out. I know you. You need to be doing something. I don't want you to be unhappy for the next fifty years. This isn't working and you damn well know it.
Trowa:
I don't regret not going home. *looks out the window* If the price of being with you and Kevin is a lousy job then I'll pay it gladly. *sighs knowing I've said too much*
Quatre:
You don't have to. There are options, love. I know there are. *Sigh* *moves closer and kisses you gently* [ You should have said something sooner]
Trowa:
It's not so bad, Cat, really. I don't even know what else to do.
Quatre:
It is so bad, Trowa. That's the point. *shakes my head* Have you thought about going back to school?
Trowa:
No. I'll leave that to you and Fei. *smiles* I'd rather work.
Quatre:
Okay. *slowly, thinking* You were a great mechanic. What about something more hands on?
Trowa:
*is silent for a moment* I think I would enjoy that, but *swallows* *shakes head* I've never had a lot. What World Ex pays is way more than I would need but *looks at you* but I need to think of you and Kevin too.
Quatre:
We don't need a lot either, Trowa. We managed before, combining what we had. Kev and I are both working part time. I'd prefer we had less and you were happy. I know Kev would feel the same way. *frowns* Are you staying in this job because of us?
Trowa:
*shifts eyes*
Quatre:
*Sighs* I had a feeling that was the case. Trowa, love. This isn't working. It's not worth it.
Trowa:
You are both worth it.
Quatre:
We want you to be happy. Trowa. You being unhappy is not worth it. *softy* This affects Kev as well. I'm gong to let him know it's safe to come home now, okay?
Trowa:
*nods* I'm happy, you two make me happy
Quatre:
Yes but you could be happier. You can't base your life just on us, Trowa. *to Kev* [ Could you come home, love? We need to talk about something.]
Trowa:
I'm not doing that but you are a great part of my life.
Kevin:
*brushes at my eyes so you can't tell I was crying* [I will be there in a minute] *stands up and brushes sand off my clothes* *picks up my satchel and teleports*
Quatre:
*frowns* [ Kev, are you okay?]
Kevin:
*sets down my satchel* *nods*
Trowa:
*pulls you into the sofa with us*
Kevin:
*settles down between you and tries to smile*
Quatre:
*puts my arms around both of you* We're okay, Kev. We've been talking about something. *looks at Trowa*
Trowa:
*shifts eyes* Work.
Kevin:
*strokes Trowa's arm* Oh.
Trowa:
*focuses on the window and the night outside*
Quatre:
*gives Trowa another look and sighs* He's not happy at WorldEx. I've told them that he needs to be happy. That the money doesn't matter, we'll be okay.
Trowa:
*mumbles* It's not that bad
Kevin:
*nods slowly in agreement* You should be happy with what you do. It is a part of who you are.
Quatre:
*raises an eyebrow and snorts* Not that bad? Right...
Trowa:
I'm happy with you, and I want you to be happy. *looks at Quatre* It's not that bad
Kevin:
*softly* I want you to be happy too. *swallows hard* If it is not that bad why were you fighting?
Quatre:
It is that bad, Trowa. Stop sidestepping.
Trowa:
Kev, if I leave WorldEx, it will affect all of us.
Kevin:
I know.
Quatre:
If you stay it affects all of us too.
Kevin:
*quickly* I can get a second job. I only work a few hours now.
Trowa:
No.
Quatre:
*shakes my head* No
Trowa:
You are studying. That's more important.
Quatre:
Trowa's right. And he has an idea what he wants to do. It just doesn't pay as much as WorldEx does.
Kevin:
*tilts my chin up* I want to do my part.
Quatre:
*softly* Kev, love. You are doing your part. You are studying and working already. That's more than enough.
Trowa:
Exactly. *pauses* I'm not studying. I have the time and the will to work. Kev, this is exactly why I didn't want to say anything about WorldEx
Kevin:
*cringes, thinks I have messed things up* *drops my eyes* [I'm sorry]
Quatre:
*caresses Kev through the bond* It's okay. It was a good thing to offer, but you are doing enough. *softly* Trowa, do you want to tell Kev what you'd like to do instead?
Kevin:
*raises my eyes to look at Trowa*
Trowa:
*puts a hand on Kevin's knee* Don't apologize. I think I would enjoy working on mechanics.
Quatre:
Trowa is very good at that.
Kevin:
Like Duo?
Trowa:
Better.
Kevin:
*has to laugh*
Quatre:
*grins* Trowa is a very very good mechanic.
Kevin:
Duo does very well being a mechanic.
Quatre:
He also managed to get a job without having to produce qualifications so this may work out okay.
Trowa:
*nods thoughtfully*
Kevin:
*hugs Trowa* I don't care what you do I just want you to be happy.
Trowa:
*smiles and returns the hug* Are you both sure?
Kevin:
*answers immediately* Yes
Quatre:
Yes. *nods, leans over and kisses Trowa* Very sure.
Trowa:
Fine, then. Thank you.
Quatre:
*smiles, feeling happier than I have in weeks* Thank you for talking to us. *softly* Promise me that next time you will before it gets this bad?
Trowa:
I promise.
Kevin:
*pulls Cat into the hug and smiles* I love you.
Quatre:
I love you too. Both of you.
Trowa:
*kisses you both* [Love you. Thank you.]
http://psych-boi-82.livejournal.com/26116.html
Quatre:
*takes a sip of tea* *tries to focus on the textbook I'm reading but fails* *rubs my temples and sighs*
Trowa:
*takes out my keys and unlocks the door* *opens it slowly and walks inside* *closes the door and walks up to you* *puts my hand on your temples and rubs circles slowly* Long day?
Quatre:
*looks up at you* *Smiles* Something like that, yes.
Trowa:
*sits down beside you* Take a break. *gestures to the books* I'm sure this can wait a while.
Quatre:
*Sighs* Everything else does so I suppose this is no different. Would you like some tea? I've just finished this. Kev made it before he went to the library.
Trowa:
No, Cat. I'm fine. *leans back on the wall and kicks shoes off*
Quatre:
*watches you* *moves over on the couch* *Pats the space next to me* There's room here if you'd prefer.
Trowa:
*smiles* *crawls onto the couch, leaving the shoes on the floor* *leans closer to you and closes my eyes for a moment, resting them.*
Quatre:
You're tired. *leans over and kisses your forehead* You're working very long hours. *softly* I don't remember the last time we sat like this.
Trowa:
*puts an arm around you, eyes still closed* We can enjoy the time now.
Quatre:
Yes we can. *Sighs* I miss you, Trowa. Our schedules don't seem to be meshing very well at all lately.
Trowa:
I know. *opens my eyes and blinks a couple of times* I don't think my hours will get better anytime soon.
Quatre:
Oh. *turns my head away slightly and stares at the wall* I'm not sure mine are either. I had hoped....*shakes my head* Never mind.
Trowa:
*looks at you* What?
Quatre:
I've been feeling a bit.....*shakes my head* It's foolish. *Shrugs* I'm not even sure it's me.
Trowa:
*frowns* What is is, Quatre?
Quatre:
*slowly* I'm not sure. I'm feeling things. Emotions. I thought they were mine, but I'm not sure. *sigh* They're getting worse and I'm not dealing with them very well.
Trowa:
*shifts eyes* What emotions?
Quatre:
*bites down on my lip* [Agitation, frustration. ] *looks at you* [ I've been feeling very unsure of things....about.....] *trails off*
Trowa:
*runs a hand through my hair* unsure?
Quatre:
*nods* That's the one that's upsetting me the most. *whisper* I thought it was to do with us, because we're not seeing much of each other anymore. I can't....*stops*
Trowa:
*whispers* It's not about us.
Quatre:
*doesn't hide my relief* I didn't want it to be. I want to think we're okay. *studies your face* We are okay, aren't we? I feel like I never see you anymore....*frowns* Do you know what this is about?
Trowa:
*kisses you* We are okay. *licks my lips* It's work.
Quatre:
*kisses you back slowly, savouring your taste* *breaks the kiss* Work? Are these your feelings, Trowa?
Trowa:
*nods* I didn't know they were affecting you. Im sorry.
Quatre:
*feels guilty* No, it's okay. I should have talked to you earlier, insisted we talked instead of worrying about it. About us. *squeezes your hand* If it's affecting you that badly why don't you leave?
Trowa:
*shrugs* I'm just bored. It's not that bad.
Quatre:
*voice slightly sharp* I'm not just picking up on boredom, Trowa. And I'm not that much of an idiot. Talk to me. Please.
Trowa:
You are very rarely an idiot. *shakes head* I don't know what else to do.
Quatre:
It's affecting you, love. I can feel it. *reaches out and strokes your face* You can't stay at a job you hate. *softly* I know what that can do to you. I can feel what it's doing to you. There has to be options. There always are - it's just a case of finding them.
Trowa:
*smiles slightly* You are getting worked up over something unimportant. There are worse things than a boring job.
Quatre:
*voice raises slightly* I am not getting worked up. If this is so damn unimportant why have I been getting all this crap from you? Tell me that.
Trowa:
*grumbles* because I was careless.
Quatre:
*raises an eyebrow* So it's /careless/ to let someone who loves you know how you're feeling. *glares at you* I thought we could be honest with each other. Obviously I was wrong
Trowa:
*sighs* Quatre, this is a stupid job I'm not happy with. I can certainly deal with it. I used to deal with bigger things.
Quatre:
*looks stubborn* This is not just a stupid job, Trowa. I have not spent the last month or so wondering if there was something seriously wrong with our relationship because of nothing.
Trowa:
Do you think there's something wrong?
Quatre:
You tell me. *counts off on my fingers* Let's see. You're /bored/ at work and didn't tell me, so we have communication problems. I only worked out there is something wrong because you got /careless/. Should I continue?
Trowa:
What do you want me to tell you, Quatre? It's a job, a fucking job, it isn't supposed to be fun.
Quatre:
I know that. But it's not supposed to do this to you either. It was supposed to be a temporary thing. You were supposed to be going home. *looks down* You were helping the general out. I know you. You need to be doing something. I don't want you to be unhappy for the next fifty years. This isn't working and you damn well know it.
Trowa:
I don't regret not going home. *looks out the window* If the price of being with you and Kevin is a lousy job then I'll pay it gladly. *sighs knowing I've said too much*
Quatre:
You don't have to. There are options, love. I know there are. *Sigh* *moves closer and kisses you gently* [ You should have said something sooner]
Trowa:
It's not so bad, Cat, really. I don't even know what else to do.
Quatre:
It is so bad, Trowa. That's the point. *shakes my head* Have you thought about going back to school?
Trowa:
No. I'll leave that to you and Fei. *smiles* I'd rather work.
Quatre:
Okay. *slowly, thinking* You were a great mechanic. What about something more hands on?
Trowa:
*is silent for a moment* I think I would enjoy that, but *swallows* *shakes head* I've never had a lot. What World Ex pays is way more than I would need but *looks at you* but I need to think of you and Kevin too.
Quatre:
We don't need a lot either, Trowa. We managed before, combining what we had. Kev and I are both working part time. I'd prefer we had less and you were happy. I know Kev would feel the same way. *frowns* Are you staying in this job because of us?
Trowa:
*shifts eyes*
Quatre:
*Sighs* I had a feeling that was the case. Trowa, love. This isn't working. It's not worth it.
Trowa:
You are both worth it.
Quatre:
We want you to be happy. Trowa. You being unhappy is not worth it. *softy* This affects Kev as well. I'm gong to let him know it's safe to come home now, okay?
Trowa:
*nods* I'm happy, you two make me happy
Quatre:
Yes but you could be happier. You can't base your life just on us, Trowa. *to Kev* [ Could you come home, love? We need to talk about something.]
Trowa:
I'm not doing that but you are a great part of my life.
Kevin:
*brushes at my eyes so you can't tell I was crying* [I will be there in a minute] *stands up and brushes sand off my clothes* *picks up my satchel and teleports*
Quatre:
*frowns* [ Kev, are you okay?]
Kevin:
*sets down my satchel* *nods*
Trowa:
*pulls you into the sofa with us*
Kevin:
*settles down between you and tries to smile*
Quatre:
*puts my arms around both of you* We're okay, Kev. We've been talking about something. *looks at Trowa*
Trowa:
*shifts eyes* Work.
Kevin:
*strokes Trowa's arm* Oh.
Trowa:
*focuses on the window and the night outside*
Quatre:
*gives Trowa another look and sighs* He's not happy at WorldEx. I've told them that he needs to be happy. That the money doesn't matter, we'll be okay.
Trowa:
*mumbles* It's not that bad
Kevin:
*nods slowly in agreement* You should be happy with what you do. It is a part of who you are.
Quatre:
*raises an eyebrow and snorts* Not that bad? Right...
Trowa:
I'm happy with you, and I want you to be happy. *looks at Quatre* It's not that bad
Kevin:
*softly* I want you to be happy too. *swallows hard* If it is not that bad why were you fighting?
Quatre:
It is that bad, Trowa. Stop sidestepping.
Trowa:
Kev, if I leave WorldEx, it will affect all of us.
Kevin:
I know.
Quatre:
If you stay it affects all of us too.
Kevin:
*quickly* I can get a second job. I only work a few hours now.
Trowa:
No.
Quatre:
*shakes my head* No
Trowa:
You are studying. That's more important.
Quatre:
Trowa's right. And he has an idea what he wants to do. It just doesn't pay as much as WorldEx does.
Kevin:
*tilts my chin up* I want to do my part.
Quatre:
*softly* Kev, love. You are doing your part. You are studying and working already. That's more than enough.
Trowa:
Exactly. *pauses* I'm not studying. I have the time and the will to work. Kev, this is exactly why I didn't want to say anything about WorldEx
Kevin:
*cringes, thinks I have messed things up* *drops my eyes* [I'm sorry]
Quatre:
*caresses Kev through the bond* It's okay. It was a good thing to offer, but you are doing enough. *softly* Trowa, do you want to tell Kev what you'd like to do instead?
Kevin:
*raises my eyes to look at Trowa*
Trowa:
*puts a hand on Kevin's knee* Don't apologize. I think I would enjoy working on mechanics.
Quatre:
Trowa is very good at that.
Kevin:
Like Duo?
Trowa:
Better.
Kevin:
*has to laugh*
Quatre:
*grins* Trowa is a very very good mechanic.
Kevin:
Duo does very well being a mechanic.
Quatre:
He also managed to get a job without having to produce qualifications so this may work out okay.
Trowa:
*nods thoughtfully*
Kevin:
*hugs Trowa* I don't care what you do I just want you to be happy.
Trowa:
*smiles and returns the hug* Are you both sure?
Kevin:
*answers immediately* Yes
Quatre:
Yes. *nods, leans over and kisses Trowa* Very sure.
Trowa:
Fine, then. Thank you.
Quatre:
*smiles, feeling happier than I have in weeks* Thank you for talking to us. *softly* Promise me that next time you will before it gets this bad?
Trowa:
I promise.
Kevin:
*pulls Cat into the hug and smiles* I love you.
Quatre:
I love you too. Both of you.
Trowa:
*kisses you both* [Love you. Thank you.]