intellectually numb

[desensitize_me]

so i sit here
and i crave
to suck in my carcinogen
and swallow my escape
and taste the sweet taste of numbness

so i sit here
and i long
for an everlasting sleep
and a knive in my skin
to tear into my pain

so i sit here
and i wish
for a bottle in my hand
to drown my sorrows
in an endless cycle of shame