God
So I forgot to add this amazing conversation I had two nights ago. There is a guy on my boat who is a crazy liberal...and we intially started this conversation as a political fight. He worked on the Kerry Campaign and I think Kerry is an idiot. Anyway, we soon discovered that we had a lot else to talk about, things that didn't make us glare at each other while sanding...and we stumbled on the topic of God. I have undergone more than one earth shattering evolution on this topic, but I think I've finally settled (at least for now) on one that makes me content and matches with what I believe and feel.
God, as far as I believe, isn't one almighty being or any shiny floaty guy with a white beard. God is the sum of humanity's collective. God is the best of humanity. God is that comfort we feel when we enjoy others who believe in this goodness. This is hard to describe but... strangely, this can most easily be described with quantum physics. QP says that we are all the same matter, electrons and protons and neutrons. we are the same matter as everything in the universe. Everything. And I think when we die, we simply become other things, our atoms become the earth and the trees and others and everything. This isn't particularly comforting for those who are afraid of losing conscious thought, but I think that its comforting knowing that I will return to what I was. This isn't completly illogical, look at Buddist thought and you will find a small part of what I am talking about. Buddists would say that we all have the chance at reaching Nirvana (Heaven) and reaching spiritual enlightenment. God was created as a way to name this positive energy humans feel. I have never believed in a omnipresent being. I have never believed that we died and our conciousness floated through pearly white gates, were given white robes and harps, and floated around in oblivion for all eternity. It just seemed....wishful and silly to me. But I do believe in the tenets of the Bible, becuase they encourage us to live honorably. But they are the same tenets as other major religions and no better or worse than the others. I believe much evil has been done in the name of GOD because men got greedy with their god and made wars on others to prove their god was better. That's religion gone wrong.
The Dali Llama once responded to the question "what is the meaning of life" by asking the questioner a question.
"what do you think it is?"
The college student responded "I don't know"
His Holiness responded by nodding and smiling.
Another person in the crowd objected, saying, "you didn't anwser his question"
The Dali Llama said " the fact that you don't know is the anwser. If you knew the meaning of life, you would cease to exist, we exist to find the meaning of life and once we have found it, we cease"
Of course, this is what Buddists hope will happen...but I loved this story.
Einstein said that what we call God is a collection of the energy humans have created. And this makes sense to me with the things I've felt and seen. Ghosts can exist becuase they are energy, just in a different form. and I have seen Ghosts..I saw my gramma. This would explain why people who encounter ghosts often feel cold. Calling up enough energy for existence on this plane would require a large amount of energy, and in Chemistry we learned about exothermic reactions and how much energy this requires.
I know this seems kinda out of logical progression, but its 3 in the am here...and I'm trying to think over the sounds of people playing grand theft auto san andres.
Suffice it to say, I haven't lost faith. On the contrary, I've never believed in God more. I never had a complete grip on how this whole God things works, and exactly what humanity was and our origins and the things controlling us. David Hume is one of my favorite authors and this works opened my eyes. Essentially he says that we make our own universe. That we have the power to change things becuase we are creating everything around us. Now....I'm taking that not so literally (not matrix - there is no spoon- like), but instead as, I have the power to control my own destiny and my own point in life. If I'm having a bad day, I can simply choose to reexamine and think of it another way and i will no longer be having a bad day...so says Hume. I find this control also comforting. God to me now is this immense energy of humanity. Our love, hope, dreams, etc...the best of humanity is God. Its the energy of humans and its beautiful. And I will still go to church and sing louder than anyone in praise of God, the collection of humanity and the source of its beauty.