(no subject)
I haven't been back here in awhile. I actually found another place to write journals. 750words.com It is actually a pretty cool place to write. Although it is only free for the first month. $5 a month after that. I just paid last night. There are a bunch of interesting features and logistics on it, but my favorite part is that it challenges you to write 750 words everyday. Another thing is that it is completely private. Although we do want to share a dose of our life to the world, its nice to have a place where you can write what ever you want. I mean anything. The goal being just to reach 750 words. This wouldn't have been for me awhile back. I'd give up someway after a week or two. It's been a month so far and I started paying to write. Sounds ridiculous. Why would you pay money that can be easily done for free? I don't know. With the way I think I have rationalized both sides, but I'll stick with the site. I enjoy it, so $5 isn't too much to ask for since it's about the cost of a meal; even less. I have to thank my first love for sharing the site to me. We recently just messaged each other after years of silence. It's been over a decade since I last saw her. I have to follow up with her again. I'd rather not go a long time not talking to her for an extended period of time. She said she remember that I liked to write. I didn't really think so, but then I remember we shared a blog together. I may not like to write, but I always did like to share my romantic feelings. I felt we were similar in a few ways. That's why I was drawn to her. I really am glad to have loved her for the short 9 months we were together as a couple. I still care about her today. I'd like to see her in New York if I ever get the chance, which I might since the next conference for SFC is in New York next year.
Why am I writing here? I was just going through my hyperlink bar thing and saw this site. I just clicked on it and decided to look through it. When I decided to write something, it asked if I wanted to restore my last draft. When it did, there were only two words, "Trust Him." It's been awhile since I stopped coming here. To see those words come up was quite a pleasant surprise. A lot has happened, and my relationship with God has grow so much. I have learned to love and forgive myself and trust my everything to Him. A Christian life really is different from any other if you put your whole heart into it. The people that I have met truly are amazing. My journey through life suddenly to a turn for the better and I have Christ and my brothers and sisters in Christ to thank for that.
It really is hard to let go of my old life. It takes effort not to look back on it in a way it will affect what I have now. Thinking about all the posts I was doing before I went on hiatus were about Jennifer, and my struggles with trying to live in my faith. Now that I'm here, my faith is stronger than it has ever been. I do still think about Jennifer. I'm really proud of how she has moved on from our relationship. There is something about her that just makes her such a wonderful person, and I'm so thankful I got to have six years of it. I don't think I can be friends with her the way I wanted to. Maybe it's because I tried to hard or just wasn't really ready. Regardless, we are still cool with each other. I care about her deeply, but I have my own life I need to focus on. I'm sure that's what she wants me to be doing. I'll always love her.
Now I can focus on being the best version of myself. I will love as much as I possibly can. My brothers say to love your wife before you even meet her. I do hope that God has someone for me. If that may not be the case, I am thankful for having a taste of what it means to love someone. I have so much more to offer, so I'll continue this path and do my best to live according to His will.
If I am not meant for the sacrament of marriage, I do hope to have children of my own. That has been an interesting childhood dream of mine. Also being a taxi driver. I just might have to sign up for Uber or Lyft sometime after I get a new car.
Why am I writing here? I was just going through my hyperlink bar thing and saw this site. I just clicked on it and decided to look through it. When I decided to write something, it asked if I wanted to restore my last draft. When it did, there were only two words, "Trust Him." It's been awhile since I stopped coming here. To see those words come up was quite a pleasant surprise. A lot has happened, and my relationship with God has grow so much. I have learned to love and forgive myself and trust my everything to Him. A Christian life really is different from any other if you put your whole heart into it. The people that I have met truly are amazing. My journey through life suddenly to a turn for the better and I have Christ and my brothers and sisters in Christ to thank for that.
It really is hard to let go of my old life. It takes effort not to look back on it in a way it will affect what I have now. Thinking about all the posts I was doing before I went on hiatus were about Jennifer, and my struggles with trying to live in my faith. Now that I'm here, my faith is stronger than it has ever been. I do still think about Jennifer. I'm really proud of how she has moved on from our relationship. There is something about her that just makes her such a wonderful person, and I'm so thankful I got to have six years of it. I don't think I can be friends with her the way I wanted to. Maybe it's because I tried to hard or just wasn't really ready. Regardless, we are still cool with each other. I care about her deeply, but I have my own life I need to focus on. I'm sure that's what she wants me to be doing. I'll always love her.
Now I can focus on being the best version of myself. I will love as much as I possibly can. My brothers say to love your wife before you even meet her. I do hope that God has someone for me. If that may not be the case, I am thankful for having a taste of what it means to love someone. I have so much more to offer, so I'll continue this path and do my best to live according to His will.
If I am not meant for the sacrament of marriage, I do hope to have children of my own. That has been an interesting childhood dream of mine. Also being a taxi driver. I just might have to sign up for Uber or Lyft sometime after I get a new car.