Truth and Reconciliaton - now what?
I'm a little confused by the whole Truth and Reconciliation Commission process at this point. This is bad, because I'm a white Canadian, a minister in a church that ran a handful of the schools, and I have ethnic roots that go back as far as two hundred years in one case. Obviously, I have had relatives who at least permitted the Residential Schools to happen, possibly voted for it in referenda, potentially agreed in principle with the idea of educating native children with Western ways, because the White Man was here, and He wasn't going away! I can assume that my white, European forebears allowed, encouraged, or otherwise engaged the practice which, in many ways, amounted to an attempt at cultural genocide. I get that.
But I didn't do it.
Twenty years ago, the PCC issued a formal apology on behalf of the denomination to all those who had attended the schools that we operated, all of which closed before I was born. I realize that not all of the schools were closed before 1971 - a few operated well into the 90's! But the ones that we were responsible for as Presbyterians were shut by 1970.
Am I still to blame?
Am I still "part of the problem"?
I'm not sure how I would be.
Herein lies the difficulty, I suppose. A friend of mine posted a pic of handcuffs supposedly used to drag children off the reservations and to these schools. The caption was essentially, "We can't pretend that this didn't happen!" No, we can't. But the issue isn't over whether or not it happened; it's over what to do now.
In South Africa, the T&RC was enacted within months of apartheid falling out of use. Ours waited almost fifteen years before starting, and I'm really not sure what the outcome can possibly be. In SA, people who had been directly oppressed or discriminated against told their stories, had names and faces and nightmares all around them, and in many cases (so I heard) the people who had directly harmed them were brought forward to say, "I am sorry for what I did to you; please forgive me!" Are we waiting, perhaps, for the surviving teachers to come forward now and say that they are sorry for what they did, thinking it was best, and realizing upon reflection that they were wrong? How many surviving teachers can there be? And even if they were to say the same thing as those white SA's, would their apology be accepted?
In Germany, the postwar, post-Holocaust world got to watch as top Nazi officers and officials were tried for their crimes against humanity (again, starting right away, in 1946!). Many were hanged. Others were given life sentences in prison. Some who escaped were hunted by Jewish search teams for years. Still others were set free, with only the guilt of their conscience to plague them through the rest of their lives. The real question wasn't so much of guilt as complicity - "I was just following orders" was complicity; "My country was at war and I fought in it" is only guilt. Those civilians who cleaned up bodies in concentration camps or were otherwise exposed to the horrors that their country committed vowed to not let such a thing happen again, if they could help it. Germany is now Israel's largest European trading partner. Somewhere, somehow, true "reconciliation" has occurred. Many said they were sorry for what they had done, and the other side accepted the apology. But by this point in time, almost all of the "vets" of both sides are gone - even a child born in a camp is at least 70 years old now! For that child to hear from a German child, born perhaps the same day in different circumstances, "I'm sorry for what my father allowed to happen to your father," evinces an understanding of the situation that is on one hand touching and on the other hand assuring, "This won't happen again." But as an apology, I'm not sure how sincere it can be.
There's my bind. How can I be "reconciled" to someone I've never met? How can I be "reconciled" to someone I've never personally offended, but who may well be offended at me simply because of my white skin? I had no more choice over that than they did! What could I be "sorry" for, other than that what happened, happened, and that they feel the way they do. And I was taught that "sorry" is not the word for that situation, because it implies that a) I did something and b) I won't do it again!
As a world, I think we're breeding more alcoholics than we used to, and not just because we have more people than we used to. Everyone has stress. Everyone has troubles. And far too many try to drown some manner of abuse or horrific exposure or whatever with a bottle of this or that, a drug of choice, a prescription or otherwise. There comes a point where we have to own our problems, though, and say that we aren't going to let them keep us down. There comes a point where you have to look at your bottle or whatever and say, "This isn't helping." At THAT point, come talk to me and let's talk about what will. I can't help you with your guilt or your shame or your pain or whatever as long as you are drowning it, as long as you keep throwing yourself back down the hole and then asking for yet another boost out of it. Climb out,with or without my help, and let's see what we can do about filling it in so that we're not afraid of it any more.
Side-note: surely the natives realize that the next generation of Canadians will not care about these matters. When the Canada-born children of Indian, Chinese, African and etc. immigrants become the next generation of politicians, and the white faces are crowded out of politics and are no longer the majority, the governments that will be elected will not care about the native concerns, at least not with the same amount of ingrained guilt. They will tell them that they can keep their culture, and that they can practice it in their own ways and places, but the sweat lodge and Diwali will be on the same level. "Your grandfather's brother died in a residential school? My grandfather lost seventeen of his relatives to death squads and had eight female sisters and cousins carried off in night raids to become wives and concubines to warlords and their lieutenants, when they weren't being taught in a two-room schoolhouse that they had to walk three hours to get to. I win. Suck it up."
But I didn't do it.
Twenty years ago, the PCC issued a formal apology on behalf of the denomination to all those who had attended the schools that we operated, all of which closed before I was born. I realize that not all of the schools were closed before 1971 - a few operated well into the 90's! But the ones that we were responsible for as Presbyterians were shut by 1970.
Am I still to blame?
Am I still "part of the problem"?
I'm not sure how I would be.
Herein lies the difficulty, I suppose. A friend of mine posted a pic of handcuffs supposedly used to drag children off the reservations and to these schools. The caption was essentially, "We can't pretend that this didn't happen!" No, we can't. But the issue isn't over whether or not it happened; it's over what to do now.
In South Africa, the T&RC was enacted within months of apartheid falling out of use. Ours waited almost fifteen years before starting, and I'm really not sure what the outcome can possibly be. In SA, people who had been directly oppressed or discriminated against told their stories, had names and faces and nightmares all around them, and in many cases (so I heard) the people who had directly harmed them were brought forward to say, "I am sorry for what I did to you; please forgive me!" Are we waiting, perhaps, for the surviving teachers to come forward now and say that they are sorry for what they did, thinking it was best, and realizing upon reflection that they were wrong? How many surviving teachers can there be? And even if they were to say the same thing as those white SA's, would their apology be accepted?
In Germany, the postwar, post-Holocaust world got to watch as top Nazi officers and officials were tried for their crimes against humanity (again, starting right away, in 1946!). Many were hanged. Others were given life sentences in prison. Some who escaped were hunted by Jewish search teams for years. Still others were set free, with only the guilt of their conscience to plague them through the rest of their lives. The real question wasn't so much of guilt as complicity - "I was just following orders" was complicity; "My country was at war and I fought in it" is only guilt. Those civilians who cleaned up bodies in concentration camps or were otherwise exposed to the horrors that their country committed vowed to not let such a thing happen again, if they could help it. Germany is now Israel's largest European trading partner. Somewhere, somehow, true "reconciliation" has occurred. Many said they were sorry for what they had done, and the other side accepted the apology. But by this point in time, almost all of the "vets" of both sides are gone - even a child born in a camp is at least 70 years old now! For that child to hear from a German child, born perhaps the same day in different circumstances, "I'm sorry for what my father allowed to happen to your father," evinces an understanding of the situation that is on one hand touching and on the other hand assuring, "This won't happen again." But as an apology, I'm not sure how sincere it can be.
There's my bind. How can I be "reconciled" to someone I've never met? How can I be "reconciled" to someone I've never personally offended, but who may well be offended at me simply because of my white skin? I had no more choice over that than they did! What could I be "sorry" for, other than that what happened, happened, and that they feel the way they do. And I was taught that "sorry" is not the word for that situation, because it implies that a) I did something and b) I won't do it again!
As a world, I think we're breeding more alcoholics than we used to, and not just because we have more people than we used to. Everyone has stress. Everyone has troubles. And far too many try to drown some manner of abuse or horrific exposure or whatever with a bottle of this or that, a drug of choice, a prescription or otherwise. There comes a point where we have to own our problems, though, and say that we aren't going to let them keep us down. There comes a point where you have to look at your bottle or whatever and say, "This isn't helping." At THAT point, come talk to me and let's talk about what will. I can't help you with your guilt or your shame or your pain or whatever as long as you are drowning it, as long as you keep throwing yourself back down the hole and then asking for yet another boost out of it. Climb out,with or without my help, and let's see what we can do about filling it in so that we're not afraid of it any more.
Side-note: surely the natives realize that the next generation of Canadians will not care about these matters. When the Canada-born children of Indian, Chinese, African and etc. immigrants become the next generation of politicians, and the white faces are crowded out of politics and are no longer the majority, the governments that will be elected will not care about the native concerns, at least not with the same amount of ingrained guilt. They will tell them that they can keep their culture, and that they can practice it in their own ways and places, but the sweat lodge and Diwali will be on the same level. "Your grandfather's brother died in a residential school? My grandfather lost seventeen of his relatives to death squads and had eight female sisters and cousins carried off in night raids to become wives and concubines to warlords and their lieutenants, when they weren't being taught in a two-room schoolhouse that they had to walk three hours to get to. I win. Suck it up."