(no subject)
Ryan and I broke up today. Again. I couldn't handle being a sometimes girlfriend. I deserve to be someone's full time girlfriend. He told me he doesn't want a family, he doesn't think that'll make him happy. He can't tell me if he'll ever want a family. And god damn it I love him but I'm not willing to sacrifice being a wife and mother. Those two things are very important to me. And even if I was HIS wife and the mother of HIS children, I feel as if I still wouldn't mean as much to him as he does to me.
I'm mostly okay. Disappointed. Sad. Feeling stupid that I thought we could make it work. It's nothing like last time. I'm just sad now. Instead of feeling like my entire world had just collapsed and I didn't know how to pick up the pieces. We're going to remain friends. We share a bunch of friends so being able to stay friendly is advantageous. Plus I enjoy spending time with him. I like him as a person. But now I know we're never going to work as a couple.
I feel as if I have more closure now. Which is good. I feel as if I can move on.
I'm mostly okay. Disappointed. Sad. Feeling stupid that I thought we could make it work. It's nothing like last time. I'm just sad now. Instead of feeling like my entire world had just collapsed and I didn't know how to pick up the pieces. We're going to remain friends. We share a bunch of friends so being able to stay friendly is advantageous. Plus I enjoy spending time with him. I like him as a person. But now I know we're never going to work as a couple.
I feel as if I have more closure now. Which is good. I feel as if I can move on.