(no subject)
around new year's, I tend to get reflective in an annoyingly nostalgic way.
there are so many wonderful things about my life right now and i want to just list them and look at this list....
repairing my marriage into something beautiful
seeing my son grow into brilliant curiosity and personality
continuing my studies and doing well as they grow more challenging
of course there are things i regret from this year, and i will live with those things. shadowy trinkets of my humanity, trailing me as i forge on into the jungle of my life.
my brother, the one i am closest to, is getting a divorce. this is very troubling, as my soon to be former sister-in-law is a close family friend. they have known each other as long as i've been alive (my brother is thirteen years older than i) i am deeply saddened by this news. my parents are very angry with her and refuse to talk about it much. my mother especially. i haven't seen her this way in quite some time. she rarely loses form about life, she's spectacular at keeping her cool no matter what happens, and she is acting quite childishly about all of this.
i do feel anger, but more than anything, i feel confusion and sadness. my brother is one of my dearest friends. this is his second failed marriage, and he and my sister-in-law have a child together. i don't know why i'm not angry. i still love this woman, as i have always gotten along with her, and consider her a sister. i plan to write a letter telling her this, because she is no doubt feeling shunned from the rest of my family. maybe i feel close with her because i nearly left my husband a handful of months ago. c'est la vie.
i am recovering from bronchitis. i have finished my antibiotics, and i feel much better. i got sick on christmas eve, of all times. it was strange, i've never had bronchitis before.
let's hope for peace of mind as this year turns into a new one.
there are so many wonderful things about my life right now and i want to just list them and look at this list....
repairing my marriage into something beautiful
seeing my son grow into brilliant curiosity and personality
continuing my studies and doing well as they grow more challenging
of course there are things i regret from this year, and i will live with those things. shadowy trinkets of my humanity, trailing me as i forge on into the jungle of my life.
my brother, the one i am closest to, is getting a divorce. this is very troubling, as my soon to be former sister-in-law is a close family friend. they have known each other as long as i've been alive (my brother is thirteen years older than i) i am deeply saddened by this news. my parents are very angry with her and refuse to talk about it much. my mother especially. i haven't seen her this way in quite some time. she rarely loses form about life, she's spectacular at keeping her cool no matter what happens, and she is acting quite childishly about all of this.
i do feel anger, but more than anything, i feel confusion and sadness. my brother is one of my dearest friends. this is his second failed marriage, and he and my sister-in-law have a child together. i don't know why i'm not angry. i still love this woman, as i have always gotten along with her, and consider her a sister. i plan to write a letter telling her this, because she is no doubt feeling shunned from the rest of my family. maybe i feel close with her because i nearly left my husband a handful of months ago. c'est la vie.
i am recovering from bronchitis. i have finished my antibiotics, and i feel much better. i got sick on christmas eve, of all times. it was strange, i've never had bronchitis before.
let's hope for peace of mind as this year turns into a new one.