because yes i am a little fucking sad
why does he always get so mad at me when i say stuff? i miss him, and im so confused about us right now. he is so happy being away its fucking ryan all over again and im sorry im compairing the two but you know what its the same fucking thing. it is. im not gonna lie. two boys that i love(d) and they leave to go somewhere else where their happiness is and it doesnt include me so why do i have to be stuck wanting them still when they are so fucking happy with me not in their life? all i am is a fucking phone call. i get it im psycho i get depressed i get attached to quickly i like attention i want a boy that wants me back just as much. and he just gets so fucking mad at me all the fucking time for it. why is it so bad that i want to be with him? and now im so scared that if he doesnt want to be with me he is just going to feel so sorry for me that he doesnt want to break up with me. when will i ever learn? boys obviously dont like me enough to want to stay with me, so why bother why waste my time if i know im going to wide up hurt and alone in the end?