Poetry Means Something (Hey...that anagrams to PMS, lol)

[demonfire]

--You know sometimes I really wonder what I'm here for. I mean, whose life am I making better, who's making my life better and what's the point of it all? I don't know, I just don't feel like I'm making that big of an impact on anything. I mean sure, a few people read my poetry, they say, oh well that's great, I feel that. But when it comes down to it, is that enough for me? I don't think so, I want to be able to reach out to as many people as I can, make things better for them while making things better for myself. I have to be apart of someone's life and influence, I have to be someone's role model or else I'm nothing. I know it may seem self-centered and everthing but it's something that I need and it would make me feel better.
--I'm staying home from school today. I don't see the point of even going anymore. I mean sure I'm missing out on a Geometry lesson, but whatever, do I really need gemoetry to be a writer? And if I can't write for a living is it even worth living? I can't stand not being able to write, if I had to work it would be so much worse because I'd have to write on the weekend, my social life would be shot to hell and I'd go on that long long downward spiral that I'm on now. I don't know, it just keeps getting worse, all of it. Nothing's getting better, they all said it'd be okay after awhile but nothing's changing, at least not for the better.