Sunday night, the roof
The roof was becoming a common haunt for Bel these days, a place where he could go for privacy and contemplation. He had to make a decision soon. He'd made a promise to Angelus and he wanted his friend back. But if he brought Angelus back, people would die -- and Phoebe, as a witch, would be in danger. So would her sisters, and Kiki, who had always been nice to him, as well -- except for the part about yelling at him about Phoebe. Innocents like Allie, whom he liked, would be at risk, too. He liked to pretend he didn't have a choice, but, as Cameron, Isabel, Lana, and Blair had insisted, he did.
He turned the Dragon Blade over in his gloved hands. This time he wouldn't fail. The power of the Dragon Blade wasn't like some risky spell. If he did this, he had to be fully committed to bringing Angelus back -- and the consequences thereof. Could he take that risk?
Phoebe stepped out onto the roof. It wasn't hard for her to find out where exactly he was.
"Cole?" she said softly. "I need to talk to you... and Angel's here with me."
Bel spun around, hiding the Dragon Blade behind his back. "What do you want? What the hell are you doing with him?" he demanded.
"We're just here to talk," Angel said. "Preferably without anybody getting hurt, though I'm open to that as an option."
Phoebe frowned at Angel and then sighed looking back at Cole.
"He's here because I asked him to come with me," Phoebe admitted calmly. "I'd really prefer that no one else gets hurt, alright?"
"Phoebe, get out of here," Cole told her, but he kept his gaze on Angel, the Dragon Blade still behind his back.
"Neither one of us is leaving, Bel," Angel said. "So let's skip past that part and get to where you listen."
Phoebe nodded in agreement.
"Cole, I know you and I know what you're thinking of doing. I know about the Dragon Blade, so does Piper." She looked at him steadily. "You think you don't have a choice, both because of the promise you made and because of what he did for you." She took a deep breath. "But, this is wrong, Cole. It's very wrong... and I think you know it."
Bel brought his free hand up to his head. "I am tired," he said slowly, "of everyone telling me what's right and what's wrong. No one understands. No one can."
"Try me," Angel said, patiently.
"If anyone at this school can understand what you're feeling love, it's Angel. I feel everything you're feeling, but he understands it. You've spent so long despising him because he's not Angelus. You forget one very simple thing." She looked at Angel and then looked at Cole.
"Both struggle with the concept of the soul."
"It's not the same," Bel snapped. "I was born with one. His was forced into him against his will. And I promised him I would do everything in my power to free him from it."
"It's not a promise that you have to keep," Angel said. "Angelus isn't honorable. He doesn't deserve that kind of loyalty. Not from anyone."
"Your promise doesn't mean the same thing to him that it means to you," Phoebe said softly. "He'll use you as a means to an end."
Bel looked from Phoebe to Angel. "Of course you're going to say that," he said. "Both of you will say anything to get me to stop. Next you'll be saying he'll kill me, too."
Angel made the motion of someone who'd just had their next argument deflated before it even got off the ground. "Well... yes."
Phoebe was silent for a very long moment and then looked at Cole seriously.
"He probably won't kill you first. He'll have you help him murder others... he'll kill people you have come to care about. You're much better than that, I know you are. You don't need Angelus, love, you don't. I don't care what he had you convinced of, you're a better man than he ever could be...than he would ever give you credit for being."
"He won't kill me, I know he won't," Bel said. "And what do I care about anyone else in this school except you, Phoebe? And you I can protect."
"From Angelus?" Angel asked. "You sure about that?"
"Cole? What makes you think you can protect me from him?"
"I'm not helpless!" he said angrily. "And he'll owe me. I won't be stupid enough to leave you alone with him, Phoebe, but I can make sure he won't hurt you. He can do whatever he wants to the rest of the school for all I care."
"What kind of friend is that?" Angel asked. "One you can't trust with your girlfriend? Your soulmate? And are you going to stand here and tell me you're not better than some soulless monster who doesn't care if the innocent die?"
Phoebe stared at Cole with shock in her eyes.
"You really have no concept of what you'll cause to happen, do you?! You'll protect me? What about my sisters? Kiki, Lana, Angela... Veronica? These are people I care about, Cole! Do you think I will just let them be harmed? You don't know me at all." Phoebe's voice was sad as she shook her head.
"I'm a witch, Cole! He'll see me as a threat and there is no way you can keep me safe from that! You can't be with me twenty-four hours a day. He'll KILL me, and there's nothing you'll be able to do to stop him. Piper, Paige, Kiki, they're witches, too. What do you think will happen to them?"
Phoebe looked at Angel and then looked back at Cole.
"I know what's inside you, Cole. You are so much better than Angelus ever could be."
"What's inside me is a demon!" Bel snarled. "A demon who...belongs to Angelus. He wanted me. For the first time someone really wanted me. Do you know how long I'd waited to feel that? My mother and Raynor couldn't wait to get rid of me. That's the way my entire life was. And you want me to turn my back on that?"
He let his arms hang at his sides, revealing the dagger in his right hand.
"Angelus wanted to use you," Angel said, stepping closer to him. "That's all he does. That's all he ever does. And there's more to you than that demon! You have a soul! You have a chance to be better than this!"
Phoebe hadn't expected that. She struggled to find the words to say. She shook her head and stepped closer to him, deciding that in a case like this, she was always better at showing than telling. She lay a hand on the arm of the hand that held the dagger. She didn't get too close to the blade, as she remembered what it could do. However, she wanted him to see that she trusted him with her safety... with her soul.
"I wanted you," she reminded him softly. "From the first time I looked at you, I wanted you. I didn't care that you had a demon inside. The demon is a part of you, but it isn't you. You have a soul, a soul that is good, and you have Choice. I knew that I felt complete when I was with you and I wanted you with me. I love you, Cole...I believe in you. I never stopped."
The hand that held the dagger was shaking. "I've had this thing for days now," he admitted quietly. "And every night I come up here to try to figure out what to do. I want you to be safe, Phoebe. I don't want to see you hurt, or sad. But I don't want to die, either. It's not going to be long before Raynor and the Source know that I've betrayed them."
He looked to Angel. "Angelus was my friend and the only one I know who might be able to help me against the Source. I need him."
"I would fight for you," Angel said, meeting his eyes. "Just show me you even give half a crap about redemption, Bel. That you'll actually fight for that human side and I swear by my own soul I'd fight the Source and any other monsters that came for you."
Phoebe nodded. "I'd fight for you. Let Piper blow up that dagger, and she'd fight for you, too."
"I can't be redeemed for the things I've done," Bel said sadly. "At least you have the excuse of not having a soul. I've had one all along and it never stopped me."
"The past isn't what counts," Angel said. "What counts is right here, right now. Do you want to change?"
Phoebe moved her hand down to his wrist, still keeping care not to touch the blade.
"Cole...you are not your past actions. You can start today and change everything."
Phoebe leaned up and kissed him lovingly and pulled back to look into his eyes.
"I believe in you. I want you. And you won't be doing this alone, Cole." She touched his face. "It's gonna be hard and there are things that will be seen or heard that you won't like. If you don't have belief in anyone or anything else, just believe in what you between us. Believe in your heart."
She stared into his eyes. "Trust in me, Cole. If nothing else, you need to trust in that."
Cole dropped his gaze. "I don't even know what I am anymore. All my life I wanted to be respected and feared. I did everything I was told -- and enjoyed it -- because I wanted Raynor, the Source, Angelus" -- his eyes flickered to Angel -- "to respect me. I've done...unspeakable things. I didn't remember what it was like to be human and feel and care until I met you."
He looked at Phoebe. "You awoke something in me, Phoebe. Something I thought had died a long time ago. My humanity, my ability to love. But I kept trying to tell myself I could do both...be a demon and a human, have you and Angelus. I know I can't. I keep coming up here to figure out which part of me was stronger."
"That's your choice to make," Angel said. "That's the power the soul gives you. You can be good, but only if you're willing to be strong enough to fight for it."
"Cole... your ability to love and do good is in your hands and only yours." She searched his face. "Trust in us... trust in me."
Cole took in a shuddering breath. "I'm scared," he admitted in a quiet voice. He swallowed hard, steadying himself deep breath, then flipped the Dragon Blade in his hand and held it out to Angel hilt-first. "This...needs to be destroyed."
"I'll get your back," Angel promised. "You won't be alone."
He looked at the blade worriedly. "I think I'm not supposed to touch that. Phoebe?"
Phoebe took off her outer shirt and took the dagger from Cole. She wrapped it up in her shirt. "Piper can blow it up."
"Now what?" Cole said, still looking at Angel. He reached for Phoebe's hand and took it in his. "Do I throw myself on everybody's mercy? I know some of them have been calling for my head." He shook his head. "Not that I blame them for hating me."
"Anybody who wants to try that's gotta go through me first," Angel promised.
"I'm not going to let anyone hurt you, Cole. No one."
"What, am I just supposed to hide behind you now?" Bel said, wounded pride at the thought now overcoming regret and new-found resolve. "If anybody tries anything with me I can still kick their asses. Anybody who fucks with me is gonna pay."
If it hadn't been so serious, Angel would've facepalmed.
"Okay this?" Angel said, gesturing between them, "This is what I'm talking about when I say you've got to at least make an effort to try to be good. That means no threatening to kick asses as step one. Fighting isn't the first answer. Talking is good."
Yes, Angel was setting new records in the Do As I Say, Not As I've Done Olympics. Shut up. He was trying to be inspiring.
Phoebe's head was pounding as she watched Cole and Angel going back and forth with their manly posturing and she shook her head. This wasn't going to help matters in the least little bit. She had to get them focusing back on the task at hand, protecting Cole from the others and the Source.
She could understand their emotions and their frustrations, they had been working towards this for months, but she didn't know how much time Cole had before the next attack of whomever.
Frustrated, and becoming slightly ill from the strong emotions the two men were throwing off, she set her shirt down with the dagger wrapped in it and Phoebe shoved her way between them. Unfortunately, she placed her hands on their chests to shove them apart... and her hands landed over each of their hearts.
"No..." she moaned as the familiar roaring sound overtook her and the scenery started shifting...
Pain... lots of pain and screaming... her screams... the face that was doing the things that were hurting her... it was Angelus...
...she kept trying to run, but she never got far. He kept appearing in front of her and attacking... causing her to try to run a different way... she was losing so much blood that she could smell it... she was hurt, badly, and he kept coming... He was playing with her, like a cat with a bird and not even screaming to the ones that promised to help was changing anything...
She saw Cole, but every time he got close enough to see what was happening, Angelus told him to stay away...and he did. She was terrified and betrayed. Angelus was going to kill her, and Cole was going to let him...
She felt herself stumble and then she was airborne crashing into a tree. When her vision cleared, she looked up at Angelus.
"Don't... please..."
"Don't ... please," Angelus mocked her stalking towards her as she tried to crawl backwards. He reached down and grabbed her, slamming her back against the tree. "Really, Phoebe, you and your humanity ... it's incredibly pathetic. Loving you, being around you, it really made Belthazor so weak. And now? Now I'm stuck cleaning up his mess because he should have just killed you a long time ago."
Phoebe turned her head to look at where he was standing just behind Angelus. "Cole...?"
Cole looked her in the eyes and then looked away. "You brought this on yourself," he murmured.
Angelus shrugged. "Guess it's up to me to take care of this mess," he said as he grabbed her and snapped her neck... He stepped back and her body...
...dropped to the ground in between the two men. The sound of her neck snapping echoed through their ears and her hands slipped away from where she had been touching their chests. She fell forward, bracing herself on her hands as she started shaking. She could still feel her neck snap and feel the pain and the terror that had led up to that moment.
She was feeling both sick and incredibly weak, as well as a little shocked. From the emotions she was picking up off of Cole and Angel, she knew that somehow they had been there with her. Somehow, they had seen and felt everything the way she had.
Not only had she never shared a premonition with someone before, she had never seen or felt herself die in one, either.
Cole quickly knelt beside Phoebe, wrapping his arms around her. "You okay, sweetheart?" he asked. "Was that a premonition? That's not going to happen, is it?" He couldn't help but look at Angel, suspicious and worried.
"You tell me," Angel replied. "Are you going to keep trying to bring Angelus back again?"
Phoebe was shaking and she leaned into him, trying not to cry. "He's... he's not," she said softly to Angel. "He said... right?"
Even though he had surrendered the Dragon Blade, the wish for Angelus must've still been on his mind. But seeing the shared premonition, he realized that if he had brought Angelus back, his human soul would've been sacrificed as well. He could never hurt Phoebe himself, but he would have caused it to happen. The sound of her neck breaking kept ringing in his head, and he felt sick.
"No...never," he swore. "I won't. I swear it." The wall of denial that he'd built came crashing down, and he knew that Phoebe would've died, and Piper, Kiki, Paige, any witch in Fandom. Veronica for her part. Marty. Rory and Logan. Callisto. And all their blood would be on his hands. Half a year ago, he wouldn't have cared. But now.... He closed his eyes, fighting back tears. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
"Forgiveness won't come easy," Angel said. "You've got to earn it. Sometimes you'll never get it. But what counts is that you want to try to atone for what you've done. I'll help you however I can."
Phoebe tightened her arms around him burying her face in his shoulder.
"I'll help, too. You've got Grace, Cole and I know you won't do anything like that." She looked up and smiled sadly at Angel and then at Cole.
"About... that... the premonition..."
"It's not going to happen, love," he assured her. "Never."
He got to his feet, pulling Phoebe with him, still keeping one arm around her. He looked to Angel. "What do I do now?" he asked.
Angel gave him a rueful grin. "One day at a time? Though if you mean more immediately I'd say spend some time with Phoebe right now. As for tomorrow... well I'm told I make a good egg breakfast if you wanna stop by."
Phoebe removed herself from Cole's arms for a moment and went to Angel. She hugged him tightly.
"Thank you."
She gave a faint smile and then returned to Cole's side, pulling his arm back around her.
"Sounds like a plan," Cole said. "We have a lot to talk about." He looked at Phoebe, then returned his gaze to Angel. "I'll find you tomorrow?"
"I'll be in my room," Angel promised. He gave Bel and Phoebe a quick smile, then left the two of them to their private time.
Phoebe watched Angel leave, and then looked up at Cole. "Take me home... our home?" She bent down and retrieved the wrapped up dagger and then wrapped her arms around him.
He held her tightly. "Yes," he said, then shimmered them from the roof.
[OOC: Pre-played, no IC interaction is possible, but OOC comments are welcomed.]
He turned the Dragon Blade over in his gloved hands. This time he wouldn't fail. The power of the Dragon Blade wasn't like some risky spell. If he did this, he had to be fully committed to bringing Angelus back -- and the consequences thereof. Could he take that risk?
Phoebe stepped out onto the roof. It wasn't hard for her to find out where exactly he was.
"Cole?" she said softly. "I need to talk to you... and Angel's here with me."
Bel spun around, hiding the Dragon Blade behind his back. "What do you want? What the hell are you doing with him?" he demanded.
"We're just here to talk," Angel said. "Preferably without anybody getting hurt, though I'm open to that as an option."
Phoebe frowned at Angel and then sighed looking back at Cole.
"He's here because I asked him to come with me," Phoebe admitted calmly. "I'd really prefer that no one else gets hurt, alright?"
"Phoebe, get out of here," Cole told her, but he kept his gaze on Angel, the Dragon Blade still behind his back.
"Neither one of us is leaving, Bel," Angel said. "So let's skip past that part and get to where you listen."
Phoebe nodded in agreement.
"Cole, I know you and I know what you're thinking of doing. I know about the Dragon Blade, so does Piper." She looked at him steadily. "You think you don't have a choice, both because of the promise you made and because of what he did for you." She took a deep breath. "But, this is wrong, Cole. It's very wrong... and I think you know it."
Bel brought his free hand up to his head. "I am tired," he said slowly, "of everyone telling me what's right and what's wrong. No one understands. No one can."
"Try me," Angel said, patiently.
"If anyone at this school can understand what you're feeling love, it's Angel. I feel everything you're feeling, but he understands it. You've spent so long despising him because he's not Angelus. You forget one very simple thing." She looked at Angel and then looked at Cole.
"Both struggle with the concept of the soul."
"It's not the same," Bel snapped. "I was born with one. His was forced into him against his will. And I promised him I would do everything in my power to free him from it."
"It's not a promise that you have to keep," Angel said. "Angelus isn't honorable. He doesn't deserve that kind of loyalty. Not from anyone."
"Your promise doesn't mean the same thing to him that it means to you," Phoebe said softly. "He'll use you as a means to an end."
Bel looked from Phoebe to Angel. "Of course you're going to say that," he said. "Both of you will say anything to get me to stop. Next you'll be saying he'll kill me, too."
Angel made the motion of someone who'd just had their next argument deflated before it even got off the ground. "Well... yes."
Phoebe was silent for a very long moment and then looked at Cole seriously.
"He probably won't kill you first. He'll have you help him murder others... he'll kill people you have come to care about. You're much better than that, I know you are. You don't need Angelus, love, you don't. I don't care what he had you convinced of, you're a better man than he ever could be...than he would ever give you credit for being."
"He won't kill me, I know he won't," Bel said. "And what do I care about anyone else in this school except you, Phoebe? And you I can protect."
"From Angelus?" Angel asked. "You sure about that?"
"Cole? What makes you think you can protect me from him?"
"I'm not helpless!" he said angrily. "And he'll owe me. I won't be stupid enough to leave you alone with him, Phoebe, but I can make sure he won't hurt you. He can do whatever he wants to the rest of the school for all I care."
"What kind of friend is that?" Angel asked. "One you can't trust with your girlfriend? Your soulmate? And are you going to stand here and tell me you're not better than some soulless monster who doesn't care if the innocent die?"
Phoebe stared at Cole with shock in her eyes.
"You really have no concept of what you'll cause to happen, do you?! You'll protect me? What about my sisters? Kiki, Lana, Angela... Veronica? These are people I care about, Cole! Do you think I will just let them be harmed? You don't know me at all." Phoebe's voice was sad as she shook her head.
"I'm a witch, Cole! He'll see me as a threat and there is no way you can keep me safe from that! You can't be with me twenty-four hours a day. He'll KILL me, and there's nothing you'll be able to do to stop him. Piper, Paige, Kiki, they're witches, too. What do you think will happen to them?"
Phoebe looked at Angel and then looked back at Cole.
"I know what's inside you, Cole. You are so much better than Angelus ever could be."
"What's inside me is a demon!" Bel snarled. "A demon who...belongs to Angelus. He wanted me. For the first time someone really wanted me. Do you know how long I'd waited to feel that? My mother and Raynor couldn't wait to get rid of me. That's the way my entire life was. And you want me to turn my back on that?"
He let his arms hang at his sides, revealing the dagger in his right hand.
"Angelus wanted to use you," Angel said, stepping closer to him. "That's all he does. That's all he ever does. And there's more to you than that demon! You have a soul! You have a chance to be better than this!"
Phoebe hadn't expected that. She struggled to find the words to say. She shook her head and stepped closer to him, deciding that in a case like this, she was always better at showing than telling. She lay a hand on the arm of the hand that held the dagger. She didn't get too close to the blade, as she remembered what it could do. However, she wanted him to see that she trusted him with her safety... with her soul.
"I wanted you," she reminded him softly. "From the first time I looked at you, I wanted you. I didn't care that you had a demon inside. The demon is a part of you, but it isn't you. You have a soul, a soul that is good, and you have Choice. I knew that I felt complete when I was with you and I wanted you with me. I love you, Cole...I believe in you. I never stopped."
The hand that held the dagger was shaking. "I've had this thing for days now," he admitted quietly. "And every night I come up here to try to figure out what to do. I want you to be safe, Phoebe. I don't want to see you hurt, or sad. But I don't want to die, either. It's not going to be long before Raynor and the Source know that I've betrayed them."
He looked to Angel. "Angelus was my friend and the only one I know who might be able to help me against the Source. I need him."
"I would fight for you," Angel said, meeting his eyes. "Just show me you even give half a crap about redemption, Bel. That you'll actually fight for that human side and I swear by my own soul I'd fight the Source and any other monsters that came for you."
Phoebe nodded. "I'd fight for you. Let Piper blow up that dagger, and she'd fight for you, too."
"I can't be redeemed for the things I've done," Bel said sadly. "At least you have the excuse of not having a soul. I've had one all along and it never stopped me."
"The past isn't what counts," Angel said. "What counts is right here, right now. Do you want to change?"
Phoebe moved her hand down to his wrist, still keeping care not to touch the blade.
"Cole...you are not your past actions. You can start today and change everything."
Phoebe leaned up and kissed him lovingly and pulled back to look into his eyes.
"I believe in you. I want you. And you won't be doing this alone, Cole." She touched his face. "It's gonna be hard and there are things that will be seen or heard that you won't like. If you don't have belief in anyone or anything else, just believe in what you between us. Believe in your heart."
She stared into his eyes. "Trust in me, Cole. If nothing else, you need to trust in that."
Cole dropped his gaze. "I don't even know what I am anymore. All my life I wanted to be respected and feared. I did everything I was told -- and enjoyed it -- because I wanted Raynor, the Source, Angelus" -- his eyes flickered to Angel -- "to respect me. I've done...unspeakable things. I didn't remember what it was like to be human and feel and care until I met you."
He looked at Phoebe. "You awoke something in me, Phoebe. Something I thought had died a long time ago. My humanity, my ability to love. But I kept trying to tell myself I could do both...be a demon and a human, have you and Angelus. I know I can't. I keep coming up here to figure out which part of me was stronger."
"That's your choice to make," Angel said. "That's the power the soul gives you. You can be good, but only if you're willing to be strong enough to fight for it."
"Cole... your ability to love and do good is in your hands and only yours." She searched his face. "Trust in us... trust in me."
Cole took in a shuddering breath. "I'm scared," he admitted in a quiet voice. He swallowed hard, steadying himself deep breath, then flipped the Dragon Blade in his hand and held it out to Angel hilt-first. "This...needs to be destroyed."
"I'll get your back," Angel promised. "You won't be alone."
He looked at the blade worriedly. "I think I'm not supposed to touch that. Phoebe?"
Phoebe took off her outer shirt and took the dagger from Cole. She wrapped it up in her shirt. "Piper can blow it up."
"Now what?" Cole said, still looking at Angel. He reached for Phoebe's hand and took it in his. "Do I throw myself on everybody's mercy? I know some of them have been calling for my head." He shook his head. "Not that I blame them for hating me."
"Anybody who wants to try that's gotta go through me first," Angel promised.
"I'm not going to let anyone hurt you, Cole. No one."
"What, am I just supposed to hide behind you now?" Bel said, wounded pride at the thought now overcoming regret and new-found resolve. "If anybody tries anything with me I can still kick their asses. Anybody who fucks with me is gonna pay."
If it hadn't been so serious, Angel would've facepalmed.
"Okay this?" Angel said, gesturing between them, "This is what I'm talking about when I say you've got to at least make an effort to try to be good. That means no threatening to kick asses as step one. Fighting isn't the first answer. Talking is good."
Yes, Angel was setting new records in the Do As I Say, Not As I've Done Olympics. Shut up. He was trying to be inspiring.
Phoebe's head was pounding as she watched Cole and Angel going back and forth with their manly posturing and she shook her head. This wasn't going to help matters in the least little bit. She had to get them focusing back on the task at hand, protecting Cole from the others and the Source.
She could understand their emotions and their frustrations, they had been working towards this for months, but she didn't know how much time Cole had before the next attack of whomever.
Frustrated, and becoming slightly ill from the strong emotions the two men were throwing off, she set her shirt down with the dagger wrapped in it and Phoebe shoved her way between them. Unfortunately, she placed her hands on their chests to shove them apart... and her hands landed over each of their hearts.
"No..." she moaned as the familiar roaring sound overtook her and the scenery started shifting...
Pain... lots of pain and screaming... her screams... the face that was doing the things that were hurting her... it was Angelus...
...she kept trying to run, but she never got far. He kept appearing in front of her and attacking... causing her to try to run a different way... she was losing so much blood that she could smell it... she was hurt, badly, and he kept coming... He was playing with her, like a cat with a bird and not even screaming to the ones that promised to help was changing anything...
She saw Cole, but every time he got close enough to see what was happening, Angelus told him to stay away...and he did. She was terrified and betrayed. Angelus was going to kill her, and Cole was going to let him...
She felt herself stumble and then she was airborne crashing into a tree. When her vision cleared, she looked up at Angelus.
"Don't... please..."
"Don't ... please," Angelus mocked her stalking towards her as she tried to crawl backwards. He reached down and grabbed her, slamming her back against the tree. "Really, Phoebe, you and your humanity ... it's incredibly pathetic. Loving you, being around you, it really made Belthazor so weak. And now? Now I'm stuck cleaning up his mess because he should have just killed you a long time ago."
Phoebe turned her head to look at where he was standing just behind Angelus. "Cole...?"
Cole looked her in the eyes and then looked away. "You brought this on yourself," he murmured.
Angelus shrugged. "Guess it's up to me to take care of this mess," he said as he grabbed her and snapped her neck... He stepped back and her body...
...dropped to the ground in between the two men. The sound of her neck snapping echoed through their ears and her hands slipped away from where she had been touching their chests. She fell forward, bracing herself on her hands as she started shaking. She could still feel her neck snap and feel the pain and the terror that had led up to that moment.
She was feeling both sick and incredibly weak, as well as a little shocked. From the emotions she was picking up off of Cole and Angel, she knew that somehow they had been there with her. Somehow, they had seen and felt everything the way she had.
Not only had she never shared a premonition with someone before, she had never seen or felt herself die in one, either.
Cole quickly knelt beside Phoebe, wrapping his arms around her. "You okay, sweetheart?" he asked. "Was that a premonition? That's not going to happen, is it?" He couldn't help but look at Angel, suspicious and worried.
"You tell me," Angel replied. "Are you going to keep trying to bring Angelus back again?"
Phoebe was shaking and she leaned into him, trying not to cry. "He's... he's not," she said softly to Angel. "He said... right?"
Even though he had surrendered the Dragon Blade, the wish for Angelus must've still been on his mind. But seeing the shared premonition, he realized that if he had brought Angelus back, his human soul would've been sacrificed as well. He could never hurt Phoebe himself, but he would have caused it to happen. The sound of her neck breaking kept ringing in his head, and he felt sick.
"No...never," he swore. "I won't. I swear it." The wall of denial that he'd built came crashing down, and he knew that Phoebe would've died, and Piper, Kiki, Paige, any witch in Fandom. Veronica for her part. Marty. Rory and Logan. Callisto. And all their blood would be on his hands. Half a year ago, he wouldn't have cared. But now.... He closed his eyes, fighting back tears. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
"Forgiveness won't come easy," Angel said. "You've got to earn it. Sometimes you'll never get it. But what counts is that you want to try to atone for what you've done. I'll help you however I can."
Phoebe tightened her arms around him burying her face in his shoulder.
"I'll help, too. You've got Grace, Cole and I know you won't do anything like that." She looked up and smiled sadly at Angel and then at Cole.
"About... that... the premonition..."
"It's not going to happen, love," he assured her. "Never."
He got to his feet, pulling Phoebe with him, still keeping one arm around her. He looked to Angel. "What do I do now?" he asked.
Angel gave him a rueful grin. "One day at a time? Though if you mean more immediately I'd say spend some time with Phoebe right now. As for tomorrow... well I'm told I make a good egg breakfast if you wanna stop by."
Phoebe removed herself from Cole's arms for a moment and went to Angel. She hugged him tightly.
"Thank you."
She gave a faint smile and then returned to Cole's side, pulling his arm back around her.
"Sounds like a plan," Cole said. "We have a lot to talk about." He looked at Phoebe, then returned his gaze to Angel. "I'll find you tomorrow?"
"I'll be in my room," Angel promised. He gave Bel and Phoebe a quick smile, then left the two of them to their private time.
Phoebe watched Angel leave, and then looked up at Cole. "Take me home... our home?" She bent down and retrieved the wrapped up dagger and then wrapped her arms around him.
He held her tightly. "Yes," he said, then shimmered them from the roof.
[OOC: Pre-played, no IC interaction is possible, but OOC comments are welcomed.]