I had thought, when I was younger, that I knew all about lousy parties. After all, most parties were, by definition, lousy. Then I went to a few good ones and began to think that maybe this whole deal wasn't so bad. The good ones, in quality even if not in quantity, outweighed the bad ones. This was until I went to my first sausage-fest. It was only then that I got a true feel for just how bad things could get. Or was it? Shortly thereafter, I got to experience the worst sausage-fest of all. Not just a party with all guys, but, even worse, a party with ALMOST all guys. One or two unlucky (or lucky, depending on how desperate they are) girls showing up. That's when it gets REALLY REALLY REALLY sad. You want to see otherwise respectable people at their worst, it's just the place to do it.
And for a long time, I believed that I had experienced the worst of it. Until I found the only thing that could make the situation any worse. One girl, many guys, and they're all OLD. Now no disrepect meant to any folks out there older than myself, but when you're surrounded by a group of 30-something guys and one female, that's rock bottom. At least, that's what it looks like now. I shudder to think how bad it COULD get from here. Not only does it make me extremely disinclined to make any advances towards her for fear of being tainted by the overwhelming stench of sausage, it makes me downright paranoid of catching some strange disease and waking up tomorrow only to find myself old. I'm left with this overwhelming FLEE response setting in, instructing me to get the hell out of there before I contract something incurable.
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