Losing Neverland...
It's not that I can't be in PYO, the most prestigious youth orchestra in the city because the other orchestra's making me quite. I'm much better won over with guilt and gravity than a friendly composure. So Sinfonia won out and it's killing me. They're decent and worthwhile, yes, but...it's just something about being in the best that I've lost. They won't let me do both. There's a concert conflict and they're both being really stubborn about it....so I must choose. Sinfonia...there's no other way:
PYO stops auditioning people once they turn 21.
Sinfonia's age limit is closer to 24.
I was accepted to Sinfonia first, so I should go to them, that's their claim.
If I stay in PYO, it'll be (almost) like high school again.
If I stay in Sinfonia, I still get a decent orchestra and decent repetoire (Beethoven's 5th instead of the 7th kinda thing).
If I quit PYO, I've lost that forever. No second chances
If I quit Sinfonia now (which basically promised to hold a grudge if I dropped them), I will then lose out on 2 orchestras after this year instead of just one.
So goodbye PYO, I must think of the future.
But oh the past...
In this decision, it feels like I've lost a little bit of me. I know it should be that important, it's a high school orchestra, geez. But am I doomed to second-rate community orchestras the rest of my life? I've told myself, eh I can just have a quartet but I love being surrounded by the sound of the orchestra, making fun of the violins with the cellists and fellow violists. There's just a different atmosphere that you can't really reproduce any other way. And the caliber. It's so much easier to get 4 good players together than 50 or 100.
I don't want it to be over. But I feel like it will be. And what about after I'm too old for Sinfonia? I'm losing my neverland....
PYO stops auditioning people once they turn 21.
Sinfonia's age limit is closer to 24.
I was accepted to Sinfonia first, so I should go to them, that's their claim.
If I stay in PYO, it'll be (almost) like high school again.
If I stay in Sinfonia, I still get a decent orchestra and decent repetoire (Beethoven's 5th instead of the 7th kinda thing).
If I quit PYO, I've lost that forever. No second chances
If I quit Sinfonia now (which basically promised to hold a grudge if I dropped them), I will then lose out on 2 orchestras after this year instead of just one.
So goodbye PYO, I must think of the future.
But oh the past...
In this decision, it feels like I've lost a little bit of me. I know it should be that important, it's a high school orchestra, geez. But am I doomed to second-rate community orchestras the rest of my life? I've told myself, eh I can just have a quartet but I love being surrounded by the sound of the orchestra, making fun of the violins with the cellists and fellow violists. There's just a different atmosphere that you can't really reproduce any other way. And the caliber. It's so much easier to get 4 good players together than 50 or 100.
I don't want it to be over. But I feel like it will be. And what about after I'm too old for Sinfonia? I'm losing my neverland....