that's where mine grows...
i think it's funny how many people, myself included use the internet to express thoughts they don't really want anyone else to hear.
memories and feelings and the millions of "if" factors mixed with a few drinks and double the bongs have left me burnt to a crisp and contemplating every decision i've made in the past month. i'm too young to know what i want, and i probably won't know what i want until it's way too late to do anything about it. but i'm not worried about it...but what if ? there are a lot of things about you i miss. a lot of things about being with you i miss. laughing. playing. smoking. drag after drag, toke after toke, the beauty of something so perfect at the time, that it didn't need any make up, it didn't need any agression. passion and lust co-existed so perfectly, i've never seen balance so brilliant...what if ? i couldn't even talk to you unless i was drunk. it was embarassing. but that moment made my day, and made me smile from ear to ear, my heart and stomach skipping and jumping, a split second of sedation from my surroundings. and you, you know so much better, could have been so much bigger. but you're small, and cowardly, and my insides will be stale and rotting for a long time from my fall into nothing, led on a leash.
memories and feelings and the millions of "if" factors mixed with a few drinks and double the bongs have left me burnt to a crisp and contemplating every decision i've made in the past month. i'm too young to know what i want, and i probably won't know what i want until it's way too late to do anything about it. but i'm not worried about it...but what if ? there are a lot of things about you i miss. a lot of things about being with you i miss. laughing. playing. smoking. drag after drag, toke after toke, the beauty of something so perfect at the time, that it didn't need any make up, it didn't need any agression. passion and lust co-existed so perfectly, i've never seen balance so brilliant...what if ? i couldn't even talk to you unless i was drunk. it was embarassing. but that moment made my day, and made me smile from ear to ear, my heart and stomach skipping and jumping, a split second of sedation from my surroundings. and you, you know so much better, could have been so much bigger. but you're small, and cowardly, and my insides will be stale and rotting for a long time from my fall into nothing, led on a leash.