Wherefore Art Thou And What-ith-Ya-Doing...Ith?
Howdy gang!
It occurred to me this morning after receiving a few, "miss you" messages that I might want to update people who follow Darkprism/Demented Dee as opposed to Kelly Wyre about what the dickens I'm doing.
*smooths wicked mustache and waggles eyebrows*
On the working front...
I'm tirelessly toiling over here. Well, okay. Not tirelessly. There's naps. And sunshine breaks. And lots of long walks. But in between all that, work. Yes. Definitely.
I just finished a new novel that is currently in the hands of my (beloved) editor. I am waiting to hear back on that one. It's het. *ducks fruit* I know. It's more literary-fiction-erotica than anything else, and the story is very... personal. Try as I might, I couldn't make the woman a man *laughing* She was stubborn like that. I think you guys will like her, not to mention her friends and significant other.
The story came about because of a book quest I went on in the process of getting to know a man who helped remind me of the good and sane portions of caring about crazy people. There ARE good and sane portions to caring for crazy people. But I'd forgotten them seeing as how I'd been hurt by one in the semi-recent past.
(Side note: I'm not sure I'll ever be "over" it. Someone mentioned the other day that I was probably "over it" by now, and that took me by surprise. I went to a funeral recently and ran into a long-ago ex of mine, and we can still talk and be friendly, but it's... excruciatingly painful to be near him, now. He's happy, with a little boy and a wife and a life, but I remember what was and who he used to be and vice versa, too. I think it becomes too hard, sometimes, to reconcile the When We Were with the Here We Are. Not everybody can make the journey with you. Some people are meant to be signposts of the past, I guess. I know who I am because of the people who knew me when, and now, and will know me later. There's comfort in that, but also sincere sadness. I think, maybe... I'm sad today.)
The "book journey" involved getting a book the man -- who helped remind me of good things -- mentioned in an interview he did (or may not have done, as it turned out, *laughing*), and that lead to me reading a book by an author I want to be when I grow up. And THAT lead to research on old Japanese myths and THAT, eventually, lead to this story about a woman and her past lives and the lover she must save.
I've been told by sources who have no reason to enjoy heterosexual sex that I can, in fact, make het sex just as hot as ho-smut. I took this as high praise and breathed a long sigh of relief.
In other worlds...
I'm also working on what will no doubt be my *cue dramatic voice* EPIC MASTERPIECE OF THE AGES HENCEFORTH UNTIL I WRITE SOMETHING BETTER THAT GETS TO TAKE THE PLACE OF THE FIRST THING BECAUSE I WILL DO THIS AGAIN SOMEDAY DAMN IT... Ahem.
Sorry. Sometimes I wax Monty Python.
This beast is already sitting pretty at 85K, and will be twice that before I'm done. The story's about clearing out the chaos in your life to be who you are meant to be and do what you are meant to do.
As you might imagine, THAT one's personal, too.
I love this book. There's been some art done for it, already, by some fantastic people in my life. (Come to think of it, there was art done for the het novel, too, by MORE fantastic people in my life; I don't know what the hell I'd do without you people, srsly). It will get done when it gets done, and I plan on sending it out to find a good, solid home.
Not to worry...
I'm also working on New Amsterdam, a new m/m fantasy series, and other goodies. West is around, as well. He and Micah have been rolling around in my head for months now. You'd think they'd get tired, but... nope. *shaking head, watching and slowly eating popcorn* Definitely... *tips head to one side and widens eyes* Definitely... Not tired...
The Health Shenanigans
The past eight months have been entertaining. I apparently suffer from anxiety as much as the next chap, and I discovered this the hard way by having a full-on-out-of-body-experience panic attack while trapped inside my car. I've also discovered that detoxing is a bitch and that food will be a neverending road of discovery and error. I'm gluten free (for three years) and soy free (for about the same amount of time), and I probably should be dairy free, (I am, mostly, but damnit cheese and ice cream) but just can't quite get there from here. Not yet. I do things like drink whole-food organic shakes and cook SO much more than I ever have in my life (and even enjoy it, somewhat) and blah blah. My scans are all good, my bloodwork is good, and I feel pretty good, most of the time. I still have to watch my hands/arms so they don't go numb from overuse, but I'm able to lift weight and do cardio to my heart's (heh) desire.
Currently, however, when I leave the house it feels like I'll die. *laughs* So I do what any sane person would do when confronted with something like this.
I leave the house every fucking day.
So far, not dead yet.
To be continued.
On a personal note...
I've a few thousand ideas for websites and projects that I want to do over the next five years. My to-do list is growing longer than lifetimes, and I'm good with this. The husband figure is excellent. My family's good. Friends are good. There's the usual amount of sickness and chaos (my aunt is very ill and there are kids breaking into cars in our neighborhood and I wept like a baby over Robin Williams), but it's a moderate usual amount, which I can handle. I do family dinners on Sunday with friends and my mother. I have massage appointments and dinner dates. I spend long hours on the phone to a friend who's known me since I was eight. I dream of strangers who are becoming less strange by the day in lands that are similarly becoming my normal.
I'm more me, these days. It's taken a lot to shake of the sludge of relationships that did more sucking my marrow than they did firing up my blood. Even with the anxiety and the paranoia gnawing at my insides, I can laugh at myself, comfort myself better than I've ever been able, and...
Go for a walk.
Or write a few thousand words. Whichever, you know.
Been reading and watching and delving, too, and loving it. I've rediscovered the joy of piles and piles of books awaiting my eyeballs' attention. I read science articles and memorize grammar rules and pin quotes to cork boards and take my coffee with a shake of cinnamon and cream. I say prayers when I pass funeral processions and I remember to be grateful every day for the people and love in my life.
You see...
I was reminded recently that we are quite infinite. We do not end. Ours is an energy so intrinsically linked that it can act as a series of independent systems without causing suffering to the whole. I put that into the most recent novel, and it'll likely go as a reminder into everything I write from now on.
We're connected, yo. Fuck the spatial distance. It means nothing.
And you, my friend on the other end of this line...
You are beautiful.
<3Dee/Kelly/me
PS.
Following me might be easier on my Tumblr, Blog, or Twitter. You can find all access points on my author website:
www.kellywyre.com
But don't worry; I'll update these, too, and the stories, so far as I'm concerned, will be around so long as the Internet can hold 'em.