Sleeping all day staying up all night
Hmm apparently you cant make everyone happy all the time. Katie say shes comming to visit nov 14th but well see. i wouldnt doubt it if she cancelled. whatever i wont get my hopes up.
Apparently everyone thinks i have better things to do than drink. Well you know what, if it takes drinking to forget how much i care for u julia, then i will drink. sorry u dont like the fact that i do but u just dont understand. im so sick and tired of people thinking they know whats best for me. Only i know wahts best for me, i thought u were the best thing for me for a long time, and a lot of people said it too. but u know what u didnt think so. thats fine but dont tell me what to do. Im trying to make the best of this.
Im so pissed i wont be able to go see Story of the Year in orlando. THats another thing i hate about this place. no good concerts. well they have metallica but there sold out already.
I hate being so far from my friends. Drew has some new girl and has no time for me to come down there like we planned. i even have a ticket for whenever but i cant use it cause he doesnt have time. whatever. joey and jordan do there own thing since there in the S double C. addi and andrew are in the PBA. its so different than i thought it would be.
Whys life gotta be so hard. Why cant i find someone i love with all my heart that loves me too. sometimes i think about the past and where i went wrong. i know i fall really fast. meredeth was the first person i realyl cared about the treated me like shit. i found something a million times better in julia and nothing could ever happen. u cant find anyone at school at least around here cause we all jsut get fucked up. why cant i get a break once in life. i mean how fair is life, matt jaynes had like 5 gf's in like 4 months then tiffany and him are basically married now. why cant i find happiness like them. will i ever find the person im supposed to be with?
So im sorry if it takes drinking to forget how much i love you. The only other way to forget is to open the window to my dorm and jump. Ive thought about it but the chances of actually dying arent that great. i would prob just break my other arm. or my leg.
you probably wont even see this and thats fine i dont know as that i really would want u to read this. am i crazy for thinking all this probably, but ill be crazy til the die i die then.
Apparently everyone thinks i have better things to do than drink. Well you know what, if it takes drinking to forget how much i care for u julia, then i will drink. sorry u dont like the fact that i do but u just dont understand. im so sick and tired of people thinking they know whats best for me. Only i know wahts best for me, i thought u were the best thing for me for a long time, and a lot of people said it too. but u know what u didnt think so. thats fine but dont tell me what to do. Im trying to make the best of this.
Im so pissed i wont be able to go see Story of the Year in orlando. THats another thing i hate about this place. no good concerts. well they have metallica but there sold out already.
I hate being so far from my friends. Drew has some new girl and has no time for me to come down there like we planned. i even have a ticket for whenever but i cant use it cause he doesnt have time. whatever. joey and jordan do there own thing since there in the S double C. addi and andrew are in the PBA. its so different than i thought it would be.
Whys life gotta be so hard. Why cant i find someone i love with all my heart that loves me too. sometimes i think about the past and where i went wrong. i know i fall really fast. meredeth was the first person i realyl cared about the treated me like shit. i found something a million times better in julia and nothing could ever happen. u cant find anyone at school at least around here cause we all jsut get fucked up. why cant i get a break once in life. i mean how fair is life, matt jaynes had like 5 gf's in like 4 months then tiffany and him are basically married now. why cant i find happiness like them. will i ever find the person im supposed to be with?
So im sorry if it takes drinking to forget how much i love you. The only other way to forget is to open the window to my dorm and jump. Ive thought about it but the chances of actually dying arent that great. i would prob just break my other arm. or my leg.
you probably wont even see this and thats fine i dont know as that i really would want u to read this. am i crazy for thinking all this probably, but ill be crazy til the die i die then.